• first one

    Doing Business with the darn Stock Broker

    A man goes up to a stock broker says, "I want to open a so-and-so trading account!"

    Blanching, the lady replies, "Excuse me, sir, what did you just say?"

    "Listen you, dag-nab it, I said I want to open a trading account this instant!"

    "Pardon me, sir, but we do not stand for that sort of talk in this institution!"

    The stock broker leaves her desk and goes to her boss and tells him about her predicament. They both come back to her desk where the boss asks the man, "Is there a problem, sir?"

    "I don't have a dang problem," the man says, "I just inherited 100 million and I want to open a so-and-so trading account with this blankety-blank brokerage!"

    "I get the picture sir," the boss says, "and this wench of a broker is causing you a problem?"



    next one

    The Christian Bear

    There was a man who one day didnt feel like going to church so he decided to go hunting instead.

    He was out in the bush when he was aproched from behind by a bear. He dropped his gun by accident but didnt bother to pick it up.

    He ran for his life. Weaving in and out the trees with the bear on his trail. Curving around a tree he triped over its root.

    He looked up and the bear looked down. The bear was about to strike at him. He put his hands together and prayed:

    "Dear lord, Please let this bear be a christian."

    the bear sat down on its bum and held the mans hands, closed his eyes and said: "Dear lord, Thank you for the food that i am about to recieve"
    thanks for reading comment!