• And then he kisses me . It is a wonderful kiss, it makes me feel alive. But would Juliette really want me kissing her brother ? Right after she died ? I break from the kiss.

    " Sorry I shouldn't have did that "

    " No you shouldn't have "

    " ummm ... well I'm just gonna ___ "

    " Leave ? "

    " Ya leave "

    I watch as Tyler leaves. Thinking about the kiss the whole time. My first kiss. And it was with my dead best friend's brother. I don't think she would have wanted us to forget about her this fast.

    I take the knife to my wrist again. This time stopping to think about what Tyler said. Then I cut into my skin watching the blood run down the side of my arm and then fall onto the floor. I move the knife up farther and then cut again. I cut a total of twelve times before stopping.

    And then I sit there and cry. Why didn't I stop him from leaving ? Why did I let him go ? I shouldn't have broken the kiss . I shouldn't have been so mean to him. Why did I do that ? Do I like to hurt myself ? Do I like to feel pain ? Was Tyler right ? I'm I Depressed ? Of course Tyler was right. I am depressed. My friend died. She was murdered by Kelley. It's all Kelley's falut . Now what am I going to do about it ?