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hi plz read it and give me some feed back thx ^.^
My name is Moriko i was told my name meant "forest child" what ever that meant i never truly under stood why that was the name given to me, i am 16 years old. my life was normal that is until my father died. after fathers death mother decided we had to move from our home town in North Carolina to England for she had family there that to me had come as a surprise father had once told me he and mother were all the family i had every thing was so confusing there were so many questions in my head . what had happened to father? why exactly were we moving? it still felt like we were running away from some thing but what could it be? i had a feeling that it was connected to fathers death but i still hopped i was wrong . i could still remember the day father died we were on our way to the mall going to get clothes for back to school and he was getting mad at me saying i should never enter the forest and that it was a dangerous place..
"I'm not a child dad i can take care of myself besides you know the school trip is in two weeks i have.." i was cut off by my dads loud
"no ! you will not go do you understand?"
"but dad " i said
"we are not discussing this you wont go and.."
suddenly he slammed the brakes i was thrown forward and hit my head in the dashboard then every thing when black. when i opened my eyes everything was blurry i couldn't see "dad?" i called when i turned my head i saw him but i wish i hadnt. He was looking in front of him with a look of pure horror i tried to see what was scaring him so much. Had we hit some one? what was wrong but before i could ask he look at me and said so softly i thought i was imagining it " I'm sorry i failed you forgive me"......
- by sassy2kt4u |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 08/23/2009 |
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![](https://graphics.gaiaonline.com/images/arena-images/ic_paper_corner_32x32.gif)
- Title: "Moriko" faries
- Artist: sassy2kt4u
- Description: um this is the first time i post its an excerpt from my original story plz read and give me feedback thx if u wanna read more add me and u can read it there its a work in progress =P
- Date: 08/23/2009
- Tags: moriko
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Comments (4 Comments)
- rilakkuuma - 09/21/2009
- The two comments below are true . No sense for me to restate them . Listen to her !
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- -Deathly Destruction- - 09/15/2009
- Finally, unless you've lived in Japan or are Japanese, don't use aspects of their culture you've no experience in. This goes for any and all cultures. Writing about what you know is always best, and the english language has some pretty complex and inspiring names out there at your disposal. Good luck!
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- -Deathly Destruction- - 09/15/2009
- Punctuation is all off and the formatting is non-existent. Please check out my entries in the arena for good exampleramms of what the formatting for this story should look like, especially when it comes to dialogue and the punctuation that should go with it. Also, lots of gar issues here- please proofread thoroughly.
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- Ken-sympathy1 - 08/23/2009
- this is really nice plz continue
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