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Chapter Five: A TERRIBLE ATTACK
I moaned in pain. The Werewolf was eating me alive. Eichi looked at me sorrowfully. I glared at him and moaned in pain again. The Werewolf was on the brink of killing me. It placed it's front paws on me and Eichi flinched. He covered his nose and mouth, struggling not to attack me.
The Werewolf bared it's fangs and bit deep into my neck. I groaned in pain and nausea. Eichi's eyes turned crimson and he jumped onto the wolf. It's fangs drug through the back of my neck. I cried silently as I scrambled to my feet.
The Werewolf attempted to shake Eichi off, but he failed. Eichi bore his fangs deep into the wolf's neck. The wolf howled, then laid dead. I opened a window and Eichi tossed the Werewolf out of it.
We sat on the bed, gasping for breath. Eichi pressed his ice cold lips against my forehead, cheek, then he rested them upon my lips. He finally trailed his lips down my chin, then my throat. He bit down - hard. I groaned in pain once more.
My blood trickled into Eichi's mouth. I winced in pain and tried pushing him back.
"Eichi... was that enough?" No answer.
"Eichi, that's enough!" My face turned crimson. Still no answer.
"Eichi, no. Get off." I tried to push him away. He finally pulled his mouth away, licking some extra blood off his cheek. "Sorry, I got carried away," he muttered. I told him that it was ok. He looked at me, smiled half-heartedly, and whispered into my ear, "Get to sleep." I climbed into bed and waved him away. He teleported out. I never knew Vampires could do that...
* * *
I woke up. Takuto was sitting on Eichi's bed, which I can now call my own. Takuto's eyes had a hint of crimson in them.
"Hey... Takuto."
"Ayu," he sniffed my neck. Oh crap, I thought. Not another attack. Takuto pressed his lips on mine.
Then he subtly bit my neck. Harder than Eichi ever would, surprisingly. My blood flowed freely down Takuto's throat. I winced in pain, but said nothing. Takuto's eyes locked with mine, his eyes darker red than my blood.
"Takuto, get off!" I was nauseous. Again.
He finally released my neck and licked some blood off his lips. He coyly grinned.
"I would've sucked you dry if Eichi didn't care about you."
"He's a vampire. He doesn't need a human."
"According to him, he does. But I want you too." Takuto's lips slid onto mine. He had the taste of my blood in his mouth.
I gripped Takuto's shirt and tried to pull him off me. It worked.
"Ayu, Eichi and I... we love you."
I gasped. "You too?"
"Yup." His grin turned wider.
"What... what the Hell are you thinking?"
"About a half-human baby."
I gasped again. I wasn't ready to get pregnant. Not at seventeen!
I started hypervenilating. "Breath in, then out..." I tried telling myself. My breath came out uneven and in short gasps. I pressed my hand on my chest were my heart would be. My heart was racing like it never has before. Takuto gripped my jaw with his hand and whispered, "Relax. I'll be gone soon. Just one more nibble." I shivered when he said "one more nibble". That didn't calm me down any more than I already was.
Takuto licked my lips and chin, then starting licking my neck, his tounge darting in and out. He finally bit my neck and blood traced down my neck, down my chest, then seeped into my skin around my stomach. I moaned in pain, wincing every few seconds. The blood trailed into Takuto's mouth, his tounge picking up a few drops and tossing them down his throat. I screamed and that scared Takuto. He bit harder and pressed me onto a wall.
Eichi ran in and gasped. His eyes turned even more crimson than Takuto's. Eichi dashed to Takuto and tugged at his waist, trying to free my neck. My face was turning pale; almost paler than Eichi's. Eichi almost got Takuto out of my neck, he pulled Takuto and Takuto's fangs drug through my neck. Takuto finally let go of my neck.
Eichi apologized to me and drug Takuto into his own bedroom. Eichi came back and helped me back into bed. He sat near my side and put his hand on my head. "Tell me everything that happened," it sounded like a question. I started off with when I first noticed Takuto, then ended with when he pressed me on the wall. When I said that Takuto had kissed me, Eichi froze and clenched his teeth.
"He kissed you." He hissed. I nodded. He shouted, "That son of a bi-" I pressed my index finger to his lips, making him pause mid-sentence.
"It's ok," I whispered.
Although I was seventy-five percent sure it wasn't.
- by Miss Dizzy Redhead |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 04/04/2010 |
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- Title: Bloodthirsty Ch. 5
- Artist: Miss Dizzy Redhead
- Description: Yes, ACTION! FINALLY! 'Tis be Chapta Five, and it'll be long. Hope ya got time on 'yer hands! And this'll have gore. sadly, Chapter Six... won't. Yeah, I said it. Well... typed it. ENJOII!!!
- Date: 04/04/2010
- Tags: bloodthirsty
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Comments (5 Comments)
- ThetaNine - 12/11/2010
- by the way she wouldve pasted out like alot because of the blood loss make it a bit more realilistic
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- Mario the Davidic Hero - 07/28/2010
- wow..... very good! i can give u a 4/5
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- Dolly Akezai - 04/05/2010
- Try to slow down with the chapters, make it flow. I agree with Complicated, a little bit fast. And the confessing part, a bit to fast. Should of waited a bit longer! 4/5
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- Mon Amour Antoinette - 04/04/2010
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(continued)
Something else I noticed is that, in this chapter, after Ayu was being eaten alive by the werewolf, she went to bed right away. I would think that she would need major fixing up xD
I'm not dissing you, just some friendly criticism :3
Of course, I'm just very OCD too xD - Report As Spam
- Mon Amour Antoinette - 04/04/2010
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I've been skimming through your chapters but I couldn't help but notice a few things sticking out to me.
One thing is that it seems as though you're rushing everything; I'm confused as to how many days has gone by, or months, or even years because it seems like many things happen in one chapter (e.g. confessing love in the 4th or 3rd chapter after it sounded like Ayu just arrived). - Report As Spam