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I don’t know her... yet. Her name is a puzzle to me. But despite not having to know her name, I feel like I’ve known her- known her beyond her name. I do not even remember how I met her. Maybe I have met her in my one my dreams or she may be a part of me, of the being that I would want to be me if ever I was given a new life. Then, does that mean I already know her? She scares me though and at the same time I pity her. The only memory of her past that I have is that of her fall. The princess’ downfall..
I think that once in her life she was surrounded by luxury-that I wanted to experience but what happened to her changed my heart. During that painful event in her life as it was happening I was only but an observant looking at her tearful face and when I cannot bear it I decided to close my eyes painfully. I don't want to see them hurting her. She was begging for their mercy. I can hear the pain and fear in her trembling voice. I tried to reach for her hand but just like a ghost I could not touch her. Whenever my hands touch her body mists form around my hands. Out of frustration of not being able to help her I, too started shouting. I even remember the words I said back then, I wanted them to stop and I kept shouting the words help her! Help her! But no one came. Not even a single person in that once lovely neighborhood came. My voice... why can’t it reach them? Are they deaf? Is my voice not loud enough to even reach them?
Stop!
This memory, all I ever wanted is for this memory to be erased from my mind. But it kept pouring in like it wanted me to remember that day three years ago. My heart is in pain. It was only a dream. A dream that was not meant to be shown twice; it was not a recurring dream but my memory just keeps repeating that said dream. Every day since that day, the guilt that started living in my heart just keeps eating me. It was only a dream yet that same dream gave me a heavy burden. It was my fault. I should never have stopped trying to reach for her. I should never have stopped shouting for help for maybe someone will pass by finally. Sigh Even though I was afraid to know, I wanted to dream her again. In my heart I know she’s out there, only I wish she has escaped that time and is living a peaceful life now.
Maybe it’s best to remember the pains of the past so that in the days to come- in the future we are stronger and much wiser than before. You are a part of me. You are in me- in my mind, my heart and most especially in my dream state you are real. Will I ever have the chance of knowing you more?
Just like yesterday and the day before, when I sleep tonight I wish to dream of you..
- by imyoursifyouwant |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 07/27/2010 |
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- Title: DreamState 1: Connections
- Artist: imyoursifyouwant
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Description:
If I could slip myself inside your heart, I want to steal away all your sad memories, so that you can reach the place you always dreamed of, without getting lost...
I always look forward to when the sun sets so that the moon can show its radiance. Why? Because that would mean seeing you again in my sleep.. - Date: 07/27/2010
- Tags: dreamstate
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Comments (1 Comments)
- Night Kunoichi - 01/08/2011
- I thought this was well written. I love how it had a kind of veil of mystery about it too. The pain and longing of the narrarator was very moving too. ^_^ Good job!
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