• Finding out the world is THIS big and I'm this small, and that saving an elephant as an ant is hard. The mouse could do it, but I'm a fraction of the size of the mouse and I'm trying to help something a million trillion gagillion times bigger than me, and I don't know if I can do it.
    You ask with your eyes about my sea otter backpack, cute Japanese stickers, and baby doll t-shirts, and I'm responding with my heart that when you find out you're only so big compared to the grand scheme, it makes you feel small in more than just the literal way.
    When I only see the same faces in the day because we have classes together, and otherwise I wouldn't recognize anyone if I saw them thrice, it's odd to be just one of thousands, not to mention one of millions, not to mention one of billions.
    And then you WANT to give up, but I won't.
    I don't think I'm capable of it, if I was than that would be one thing I'd leap face first into the nothing out there.
    But I keep on keeping on because that's all there is left.
    The people in my head who are me but not me argue with me about all the things I do, the loudest voice somehow still the softest shouting, "Everything will turn out okay somehow, it always does... somehow" and that tiny, nagging little squeal who insists I'm wasting time and that I could be doing so much more.
    But I'm doing what I want to do, so it's right...


    Right?