I Am not a Hero

• Artist: summonergirl001
• Description: My first ever attempt at poetry. My school NEVER teaches us how to write poetry. The last time I did was in middle school when I was in sixth grade or something. Anyway, this is supposed to be for a college writing portfolio and I would appreciate it if people looked it over and gave me some opinion on it.
  
  P.S I STINK AT WRITING POETRY! D:
• Date: 09/17/2008
• Tags: hero

A Hero takes up a sword
Bringing the blade against shadowy foe
They step forth to battle
But metal shall not sing

A frightened hero is no hero
Cowardice is not wanted
The bold and brave
Bring Victory

So what can I hope to achieve
In a world not meant for faint of heart


Countless times I've tried so hard
To make someone see the person I'm meant to be
But all the times I've tried I fall
Then no one can see me

All this time I have watched
While others claim the prize
One day maybe I can take that step forward
And become a hero to me

Comments

[LightOfMyHeart]

I actually love this. This is full of so much meaning and I love the way it has been written. I also feel so closely related to the poem because I would love to be the hero smile
It has so many different levels of meaning to it and this is one of the reasons it is so fantastic. Not so sure I like the first three lines in the first stanza very much and I think you could improve that a bit by maybe re-writing and experimenting with what you can write.
Hope I helped ^_^

[The Love of Money]

Try more to choose every word, not every phrase, and let each word mean something.