• as time passes the drugs settle in
    as time progresses the drugs take there toll
    as the time oh time searches unknowingly forward
    for the truth of why i do what i do
    i cannot say sorry anymore
    i cannot say please forgive me
    all i can do is the drugs .....slowly ...very slowly
    let them take over my whole being
    let them become my life
    destractions become trivial
    love incoherent
    speech the process strickens to a point where no language escapes my cracked lips
    again i lean on the drugs and again
    i sit in a daze
    not thinking not eating
    just a thing that does not wish to move any more
    a thing without a purpose
    to exist and have no purpose
    you are better of not living at all
    the love i once had for humanity ...gone
    the love i once had for myself is hastily diminishing away to nothingness
    to see through the eyes of another and be able to make different choices
    i wish i had that
    but no i being full of deperession cannot go on
    so i sit on the couch with a loaded gun
    goodbye world sorry mother but as i listen to you
    cry every night because of me i connect with something inside of myself
    i feel pure and utter anguish
    the drugs no longer work
    so i have only one way out
    SUICIDE