lonley road

• Artist: ms curiousity
• Description: sad poem
• Date: 07/05/2009
• Tags: lonley road

here it is a tears form in my eyes a river of sorrows forms that depends by the minute. as my shadow disapears and i with it i fade into the background of emptyness a voiceliss. screamng out but not noticeable walking around faceless without an identy.as i walk i keep going to a rodeless path of sorrow

Comments

[mirynlee]

This has the potential to be such a powerful poem. However, I feel it's being held back both by the format and the spelling. If you write it out in the more traditional form of a poem,
Say, writing it out
something like this,
it will help to add
emphasis.

Also, your spelling does cause unnecessary stops in the poem; it's a distraction. Work those two things out, and you'll have something very deep and moving. smile