• As thoughts consume me,
    Paranoia prevails,
    I grow restless
    But will-power fails

    I can’t get up,
    From this padded seat,
    I lack the strength,
    To rise to my feet

    Loneliness surrounds me,
    And drags me down,
    I feel depression grab at me,
    In this desolate town

    I grab for the drink,
    My one “fix all,”
    But as I fall to me knee’s,
    I can't even crawl

    I can’t see what’s right,
    lost in the haze,
    My self-respect,
    Sets itself ablaze

    I try to wake up
    and do something right,
    but all I can see is the dark,
    I'm surround by the night

    I consider suicide,
    a way to end it quick,
    but reality strikes me,
    like the crack of a whip

    I cant squeeze the trigger,
    it's like someone holding me back,
    but maybe it's the courage,
    or the fortitude I lack.

    all I know is I can't make it happen,
    so I just reach for my glass,
    look death in the face,
    and scream, "kiss my a**."