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 Posted: Sat Oct 20, 2007 9:36 pm
I miss my friend. im a little teary right now. i know its stupid but still. ever since i started college i was only able to hang out with one of my best friends on weekends. were like sisters, she use to come to my house every day. we use to have soo much fun. i was ok with it since we would hang out on weekends. but then she stopped coming, she started doing stuff for the school, and hanging out with her other friend, even when shes doing absolutely nothing she doesnt even try to communicate with me . we use to talk on the phone and online all the time. and now she doesnt even call, or visit. i have to call her to check if shes ok. its like she doesnt give a..damn about me anymore. its like ive been replaced. so i put myself as invisible on yahoo, and i just decided that im not going to even try to keep our friendship. whats the point if she doesnt care anymore. although it hurts like hell and shes a really close friend. I get the picture. so im losing her slowly and soon ill loser for life. my other best friends thats in another state keeps in touch with me more than she does. lets see if she cares to show up for my b-day crying
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Posted: Sun Oct 21, 2007 7:10 am
meleny7 I miss my friend. im a little teary right now. i know its stupid but still. ever since i started college i was only able to hang out with one of my best friends on weekends. were like sisters, she use to come to my house every day. we use to have soo much fun. i was ok with it since we would hang out on weekends. but then she stopped coming, she started doing stuff for the school, and hanging out with her other friend, even when shes doing absolutely nothing she doesnt even try to communicate with me . we use to talk on the phone and online all the time. and now she doesnt even call, or visit. i have to call her to check if shes ok. its like she doesnt give a..damn about me anymore. its like ive been replaced. so i put myself as invisible on yahoo, and i just decided that im not going to even try to keep our friendship. whats the point if she doesnt care anymore. although it hurts like hell and shes a really close friend. I get the picture. so im losing her slowly and soon ill loser for life. my other best friends thats in another state keeps in touch with me more than she does. lets see if she cares to show up for my b-day crying I think you need to tell her how you feel. maybe in an email. I met my best friend when we were in 2nd grade. 2nd grade! and now we are both 36 years old and we are still best friends, still keep up with eachother, even tho I'm now in TN and she's still up in NYC (where I come from). the key to any deep and long lasting relationship is communication. not just the 'keeping in touch' type of communication, but the open communication relaying ones feelings. I've got a life and family of my own now, with a job and responsibilities, and so does she.. so its not always easy to remember to keep up with eachother. but even if i dont hear from her for 3 or even 6 months.. I still know she's there. the years have made our relationship very deep and very special. now not all friendships can turn out like mine. I think it's a rare thing to find. but you never know, and you will never know unless you openly communicate with the other person. remind her of your birthday and see what happens. if she doesnt remember when the time comes, then tell her how you are feeling.
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Posted: Sun Oct 21, 2007 12:06 pm
hey im from NYC too! and im still here.
i know what u mean with the communication, but im not the type of person to communicate with people. especially how im feeling. shes my best friend and everything but she doesnt even know what makes me angry, or hurts my feelings. and one time she was doing something that really bothered me and i actually was very opened. but then she took everything i told her and just forgot about it and continued doing what i told her that bothered me when she said that shes sorry and that it wont happen again. but i forgave her for that. i talked to her yesterday for a bit. and i told her that she doesnt come over any more and she just laughed it off, said i miss you too and didnt respond back. so ill just forget about her. because im really close to convincing myself that friends arent necessary if they just dissapoint you and betray you.
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Posted: Sun Oct 21, 2007 12:57 pm
meleny7 hey im from NYC too! and im still here. i know what u mean with the communication, but im not the type of person to communicate with people. especially how im feeling. shes my best friend and everything but she doesnt even know what makes me angry, or hurts my feelings. and one time she was doing something that really bothered me and i actually was very opened. but then she took everything i told her and just forgot about it and continued doing what i told her that bothered me when she said that shes sorry and that it wont happen again. but i forgave her for that. i talked to her yesterday for a bit. and i told her that she doesnt come over any more and she just laughed it off, said i miss you too and didnt respond back. so ill just forget about her. because im really close to convincing myself that friends arent necessary if they just dissapoint you and betray you. friends are necessary. even if all you have is 1 friend it is better than none at all. it's no fun being all alone in the world. but friendship is a give and take. it wasnt right that she disregarded your feelings when you told her something bothered you. it's a sad fact that not everyone is capable of being real friends. but putting her aside, you said that you dont communicate or tell your friends your feelings... I say, how could they know you if you dont share yourself with them? not everyone will respond to you the way this particular person does. life is a risk... putting trust in people is a risk..a gamble.. but you have to place good bets.. if you have a good judge of character and pay attention to the other persons behavior (towards both yourself and others) you can generally see who you can trust and who you cant.
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Posted: Sun Oct 21, 2007 4:16 pm
I agree with you. I dont know i guess i wont be angry at her anymore, and the truth is that no one really knows me. People know me by my actions but dont know whats going on inside my head. People think they know me but they really dont. and most likely they never will because i refuse to let them know. last time i tried to express myself i almost lost a friend, almost dragged to counceling etc. even though i still talk to this friend(not my best friend a different one) it hasnt been the same ever since. and the problem is that i did what you said i looked at this person actions, how they behaved i even got to know them, and in the end it wasnt enough they just turn on me. i dont have a lot of luck with good friends. I have yet to find one that could understand me and not judge me. life is a risk and thats why i will always play on the safe side and keep my feelings to myself.
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 1:28 am
That's happened to me before too. I was too young to understand completely what was going on. We were best friends for 12 years!!!! And just like that after he moved away. I became just another friend who's close. And the funny thing is I tried what you were doing and we lost touch for about a year. Then I decided I couldn't take it anymore.... drove to where he lived asked for an explanation and now it was like nothing had happened and time had stopped for us because we are back to buddies. So learn from my mistake and take care of the friendship you still have. Friends can be forever. You just need to keep going when things are tough.
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 5:42 am
well the best thing for me to say is to move on. my old best friend started to play video games too much and now all he talks about is video games.
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 7:35 am
there was once a time in my teens when my best friend (now of 30 years) and I lost touch. I got married, and she was with her bf, and our lives just basically separated. I would hear from her once every 6 months or so. but we always knew we would be there for eachother if something bad were to happen. friendship needs understanding and flexibility. any good relationship needs to be flexible. the more inflexible the easier it will break.
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Posted: Sun Oct 28, 2007 6:59 pm
I guess you guys are right.^_^ its just that sometimes I get pissed off and when im angry my mind works differently and I believe that i need no one and im better off alone. thanks everyone!
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Posted: Tue Nov 06, 2007 3:10 pm
I'd say ask your ?friend? if they're still with you or not or whats happening. They could be busy. I don't know. "Ask and ye shall recive"
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Posted: Tue Nov 06, 2007 8:15 pm
i brought it up and she couldnt give me a valid explanation, and i know she's not that busy. she just loves hanging out with her new friend that she sees every day and afternoon. and leaves me to rot. its all cool, im over my friendship. shes not my enemy, but we are no longer close because she doesnt care.
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Posted: Sun Nov 11, 2007 8:30 am
meleny7 I miss my friend. im a little teary right now. i know its stupid but still. ever since i started college i was only able to hang out with one of my best friends on weekends. were like sisters, she use to come to my house every day. we use to have soo much fun. i was ok with it since we would hang out on weekends. but then she stopped coming, she started doing stuff for the school, and hanging out with her other friend, even when shes doing absolutely nothing she doesnt even try to communicate with me . we use to talk on the phone and online all the time. and now she doesnt even call, or visit. i have to call her to check if shes ok. its like she doesnt give a..damn about me anymore. its like ive been replaced. so i put myself as invisible on yahoo, and i just decided that im not going to even try to keep our friendship. whats the point if she doesnt care anymore. although it hurts like hell and shes a really close friend. I get the picture. so im losing her slowly and soon ill loser for life. my other best friends thats in another state keeps in touch with me more than she does. lets see if she cares to show up for my b-day crying I've got a friend that moved away and she never sends me letters any more but I cope.
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Posted: Sun Nov 11, 2007 10:26 am
Evil-husky meleny7 I miss my friend. im a little teary right now. i know its stupid but still. ever since i started college i was only able to hang out with one of my best friends on weekends. were like sisters, she use to come to my house every day. we use to have soo much fun. i was ok with it since we would hang out on weekends. but then she stopped coming, she started doing stuff for the school, and hanging out with her other friend, even when shes doing absolutely nothing she doesnt even try to communicate with me . we use to talk on the phone and online all the time. and now she doesnt even call, or visit. i have to call her to check if shes ok. its like she doesnt give a..damn about me anymore. its like ive been replaced. so i put myself as invisible on yahoo, and i just decided that im not going to even try to keep our friendship. whats the point if she doesnt care anymore. although it hurts like hell and shes a really close friend. I get the picture. so im losing her slowly and soon ill loser for life. my other best friends thats in another state keeps in touch with me more than she does. lets see if she cares to show up for my b-day crying I've got a friend that moved away and she never sends me letters any more but I cope. im coping with it.^_^ i dont even care anymore. because i have better things to worry about than someone who doesnt give a damn about me.
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