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Posted: Thu Dec 04, 2008 10:35 pm
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Mmmkays I know I'm here a lot sweatdrop ( I got issues ok) but this isn't the usual stuff I'm used to.
I have never ever ever EVER, been asked out before. I've never heard rumors about some guy liking me -I don't quite think the little boy from preschool counts- and the most I've ever been to a guy is a friend. And now I've got 3 guys supposedly after me O.O yes, I shall pause to let the shock set in for a while.
Now my best friend(Let's call her Jenny) tells me that her best friend(Let's call him Jay) -which is a guy- likes me. I've been crushing on him for a while now but I don't feel the same adrenaline and giddyness when I see him nowadays but maybe its just that I've gotten used to it. We're both too shy to say anything bout it and we just act normal in front of each other which is something I like. But I think I'm starting to see him more as a friend then "in that way" because I've been waiting too long for him to say he liked me. -Actually I've been waiting a while for someone to ask me out-
Guy numuro 2 is Jenny's ex boyfriend. They just recently broke up but he(Let's call this one James) is a really great person to talk to. We don't really share a common interest except to fight with each other but we both know it's in good fun and games. So now he goes and tells me over the net that he likes me. He's smart, funny, sensitive, helpless at times and all that stuff that should make a girl wanna eat him up except I see him more as a brother. Nothing more so when he told me he "loved" me I stupidly said haha love ya too bro!
James has a twin. His twin (I'm gonna name his Jimmy) is someone I just recently started talking to. He is the smartest person I've ever spoken to. And he has his life planned out ahead which is something I admire in people. He helps me a lot with hw and sticks up for me when James is being a dickhead. But he is a bit uptight and talking to him is like talking to a robot. Even when it's just IM he talks like this: Hello Michelle, what fine weather we are having today. Wouldn't you say the cloud formations are rather something to behold? And the only time I've ever been able to make him laugh was when James first introduced us.
So who to choose? Because quite frankly, I feel stupid. And I know I should be when this is just stupid puppy love and it's not as if any of this will last forever. Each one has pro's and con's but my hearts only ever gone to one but they were too late to notice it. *sigh* Maybe I'll just stick to my studies. But a little bit of "love" can't hurt can it?
I also forgot to mention =='
My other best friend -This one I'll call Ashlee- along with my half cousin -Uhmm I'll call her Amy- both like "Jay". Actually a lot of girls are after Jay . . . Ashlee is super "in love" with Jay. She's been crushing on him longer than me and she practically ruins all her friendships with other people with her intensity to get him. It's annoying though cos I tell her Jay isn't a game or object to be won but she just says it's hard for her to live seeing him with other chicks. So when I told her I liked him last year, she just stood there and said something along the lines of "Oh, I guess we're rivals then" so afer that I pretended I got over Jay and we became friends again.
Now I'm scared that if she finds out I still like him our friendship will become awkward and ruined.
Ashlee's" mental health is like unstable. She's suicidal and inflicts harm on herself. She has more issues than me but I just don't understand either on why she would do that over "Jay" I'm just scared for her safety, that's all. But I told James that I didn't like him in that way and he's going out with Ashlee. Thing is that he knows Ashlee is only using him to get to Jay which I think is sad but what can I do? She is my closest friend. I also sympathize for James, Ashlee was his first crush and he only liked me cos we got close after his break up with "Jenny."
BTW heres how we're all connected:
Jenny- My best friend, awesome friend Jay- Jenny's best friend, kindest heart I've ever met Ashlee- My best and closest friend James- Former best friend of Ashlee, Now going out with Ashlee, Ex of Jenny Jimmy- incredibly cute and smart twin of James
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Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 11:37 am
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Posted: Fri Dec 05, 2008 2:49 pm
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Posted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 6:46 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 08, 2008 7:40 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 08, 2008 7:50 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 08, 2008 8:53 pm
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l-miho_chan-l beautiful expression lol i kinda identify with you lol. Shakespeare wrote "The course of true love never did run smooth." I'm one of those retarded people that believe in fate and true love. I know it's really corny but i feel like one day God will help us find the one we're supposed to be with when the time is right. Don't focus on who's the smartest or hottest or any of the drama that comes with that. Who do you look forward to talking to the most? When you hear a love song who do you picture in your head? If the answer is all of them wait till your sure about the one. lol i know super lame hahaha in my defense....you asked razz Haha yeah Jay ticks all the boxes but lately I don't feel the same connection :S Maybe something important was lost while he was still getting to know me ><
Same thing with this guy... let's call him Tim lol I use to feel butterflies but over time it's not the same. Well I guess boys just suck like that. Maybe you'll find out why the feeling left.
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Posted: Tue Dec 09, 2008 12:35 am
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beautiful expression l-miho_chan-l beautiful expression lol i kinda identify with you lol. Shakespeare wrote "The course of true love never did run smooth." I'm one of those retarded people that believe in fate and true love. I know it's really corny but i feel like one day God will help us find the one we're supposed to be with when the time is right. Don't focus on who's the smartest or hottest or any of the drama that comes with that. Who do you look forward to talking to the most? When you hear a love song who do you picture in your head? If the answer is all of them wait till your sure about the one. lol i know super lame hahaha in my defense....you asked razz Haha yeah Jay ticks all the boxes but lately I don't feel the same connection :S Maybe something important was lost while he was still getting to know me >< Same thing with this guy... let's call him Tim lol I use to feel butterflies but over time it's not the same. Well I guess boys just suck like that. Maybe you'll find out why the feeling left.
Haha so true
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Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2008 4:37 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 10, 2008 11:27 pm
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Posted: Thu Feb 05, 2009 8:29 pm
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Posted: Fri Feb 06, 2009 9:44 pm
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Wow. Talk about your teenage soap operas. lol. Nah sweetie you aren't stupid in any way shape or form. You share a similar characteristic with me, we both care more for others then we do ourselves. (Example being your friend ashlee and how she is sucidal when it comes to the first guy you mentioned, and how she is obsessed with him.) I understand how you wouldn't want to screw up any relationships, believe me i've been there. However, you should be doing what you feel would make you happy. About the first guy, who i think you should prolly go for(although give it some time and thought,cause the 3rd is also a pretty good candidate although... a relationship with him may seem like it wouldn't workout.) Have you ever thought that maybe perhaps Jay(think thats the right one lol, 1st guy) had the same problem you did in being afraid to tell you how he feels about you.. until now? I know you are worried about your friend ashlee, but to be honest.. if she was your friend she would accept you for going with Jay(if you choose to)because.. a friend should be happy with whatever you accomplish or what makes you happy, despite what it could benefit for themselves. This may sound harsh, but..she WILL find another crush eventually, she just needs that boost to tell her.. hey this guy is off limits for the meantime. My advice, do what will make YOU happy, and do what you feel is right for yourself. Everything will fall into place where it may, when it does.
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