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 Posted: Fri Jun 19, 2009 2:47 pm
Okay, this has been bothering me for a few months now, and it's really messing up my head. And before any awquard questions get asked, yes, I am a guy.
One of my best friends started touching and twisting my nipples just after christmas. Strange behaviour, but I passed it off as just taunting. But slowly, it's grown worse and worse. During breaks, he's taken to grabbing me from behind, groping me, and other 'suggestive' acts. But sometimes, he acts as if I'm not even there. I'm pretty sure I like him, but things start to get complex around here. Whenever I try to respond positively, like touching back, he quits whatever he's doing and beats me up. With him being stronger than me, there's not much I can do. I've asked him what the f*ck he's trying to say, but he insists he's got no emotions towards me, but he's said on a few occasions he wants to rape me 0.0 He's driving me mad, and I honestly have no idea what to do. Help, anyone?
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Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 10:11 am
sounds like your friend might be feeling alittle curious (i'm assuming hes "straight") but if hes actually told you that he wants to have sex with you then alarm bells should be ringing .if you dont want anything to happen subtly distance yourself or react slightly more negatively to the groping. if you want something to happen just do the opposite they all snap eventually wink but bear in mind that you could be just an experiment to him so i woudnt really go for this option unless you feel strongly (i know from personal experience, i used to "play" alot with a friend of mine from school, we sometimes wrestled using waay to many grappling moves,cover pinning me agaisnt a wall then subtly girating,kneeling face pins etc . i kept at it and eventually we started getting up to things in class and sometimes at each others houses. before you ask we did NOT have sex. now a year later were still friends and he has a girlfriend xp )
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Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 7:18 pm
Well im not sure how old you are, but it does sound like your friend here has some kind of feeling towards you wether it is sexual, or he is just curious... i don't know. Not to be stereotypical but guys always play that thing that they dont have emotion .. especially the guy you are talking about. I dont know if he is doing it to bug you, or if he likes you.. but you might want to try talking to him. I can see how this is hard for you especially because you don't know why he is doing this .. because usually when a guy is gay, you can tell .. lol! You can try talking to him, or maybe try some way to get him to tell you. Im sorry that I can't give you any real advice, and im sorry that it is hard for you.
I am gay myself, and I find it awesome that you can come out and write this .. good luck with everything!
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Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2009 8:04 pm
Well, sounds like its bugging you a lot, so I say you should try to stop him. This guy sounds very sexually curious, or as you said he may just be taunting you to an extreme level - which is not right in the least.
To start the process of stopping him (sounds ironic, huh?) start reacting in a negative way. Tell him to please stop that when he does it again, and if it persists walk away from him. It doesn't sound like theres a way to completely ignore his behavior, but if you can, by all means go for it. To be honest, its one of the best ways to stop a harmful person from... being harmful.
Next, I'm going to bring up "I" statements. They help others gain your point of view so that they can understand you better, and that helps prevent any outbursts (any kind of actual fighting.)
Here are some examples, and notice the pattern in them:
"I got really upset when you told the teacher I spit at her."
"I got mad when he started calling you names."
"I just got really upset - I want the best for you."
Stuff like that.
Best of luck, hope I helped. heart
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Posted: Mon Jun 22, 2009 3:15 pm
Thanks for the advice guys. I decided he was just taunting me to extreme lengths, and after a peaceful argument, followed by a not so peaceful fight, he finally stopped. It doesn't seem to have affected him in the slightest, so looks like my feelings were misplaced sweatdrop Anyway, thanks again.
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