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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 5:50 pm
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So, lately the boyfriend and I have been talking about what we would do if I ended up pregnant. Not that it's likely, you see, as we're pretty careful. But nothing's 100% except abstinence, and I personally feel that this sort of thing ought to be discussed ahead of time. I'd rather give it lots of thought now, since I guess it would be hard to think as clearly if I had a bun in the oven and a deadline.
So, ATGers: What would you do if, at this point in your life, you either became pregnant or got someone pregnant?
How would you have handled it 3 or 4 years ago? How do you think you would handle it in the future? I'm all ears. Or, well, eyes.
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Posted: Thu Sep 09, 2010 6:08 pm
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 8:18 am
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 10:23 am
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 10:47 am
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I swear I haven't been watching you. x3 That sounds really stressful, though. I'm glad the test came back as negative!
My parents are both adamantly pro-life. If I were to become pregnant, I believe I would likely choose to have an abortion, although I would obviously prefer it never come to that.
If my parents (who are typically very laid back about other things) ever found out I'd aborted, I don't think they'd ever accept it, and I would not be surprised if I were nearly disowned.
My friends and I were talking about this, too, and one thing we talked about was the idea of giving it up for adoption. I tried to imagine going through an entire pregnancy and dealing with all the questions and comments from friends, family, co-workers, and acquaintences...
"Oooh, when are you due? Do you have a name picked out? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl? Aren't you excited?"
"Well, actually, it's being given up for adoption. I don't want it."
*Insert awkward silence here*
I'm not sure if I could deal with that, to be honest. And keeping it is absolutely out of the question. I am not maternal in the least, and I can most certainly not afford to give a child a decent standard of living right now.
All in all, not a fun situation, regardless of what I'd decide to do.
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 12:58 pm
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Posted: Fri Sep 10, 2010 2:48 pm
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Jafthasleftthebuilding Vice Captain
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2010 2:57 am
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2010 1:30 pm
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If I get pregnant, it's my own damn fault for having sex; therefore I have to deal with the consequences of my actions by giving birth to and raising a child. I am old enough and have enough experience to be able to raise a child on my own if I had to, and my family would certainly support me. I would never ever consider terminating my pregnancy, unless it was medically necessary (ie. I would die if I didn't do it). Even in the case of raep (and I have had a pregnancy scare under those circumstances, so don't you dare tell me I don't know how I would react), I would keep the baby. It's not the baby's fault its father is a violent abusive scumbag; it doesn't deserve to die because its manner of conception was less-than-pleasant. I totally understand how some people might feel otherwise, but that is how it is for me.
I also have come to the decision that I ought not to reproduce, for genetic reasons. I think it would be morally irresponsible of me to do so. However, if I somehow manage to get pregnant despite my best efforts to avoid it, I would still have the baby. I do hope to adopt children in the future, once my life becomes a bit more stable and I have a partner to help me out with parenting. I just think it's a bad idea for me to deliberately create new lives when there are so many that have been discarded.
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Posted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 10:13 am
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We too were like "WHA?!?" You sure do have a grabby title! ^_^
As many kids as I have right now, and the stupid instinct in me telling me to have more right now, I NEED to pass on it. I really want o go to school and I'm so close to doing it! I actually have to call them today and find out when the last day to get in is. But ya, no kids for me for now.
Years ago, we were totally ok with having kids and so we did. Each time we thought about abortion as we didn't want to have a child in a broken family, or one who couldn't care for/love them. But we always decided to stick it through. Now we have Lydia going to school every second day. I can't believe how fast they're growing up!
I think I would be totally ok with being preggers in the future, I did however have a dream not too long ago about having twins and instantly we had 5 kids.... That's a bit too many for me! I would like to have 4 kids and that would be it. With any luck another boy because I would feel so bad if Dante was the only boy we had. I got pissed with having ONE sister, I couldn't imagine 3!
Also, having one kid really doesn't change much. I mean you can't go out drinking all night long (I never liked that anyway), but for the first year or so you can take them pretty much anywhere with you. Also most people don't have a problem babysitting one kid for free every now and then. Having 2 is when things change. Gets harder to carry both around, you notice expenses more, and people start saying no to babysitting. I wouldn't change what I have for the world though. My kids may get on my nerves, and Guin can be quite a handful on her own, but I love being a parent and watching them grow and learn. Watching them develop personalities, humor, compassion... Everything really. I LOVE being a parent!
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Posted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 10:48 am
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Having even one kid would majorly change my life. I work 5 or 6 days a week, for at least 8 or 9 hours a day. I don't live anywhere near any of my family, and I don't have any friends who could look after the kid, because my friends work as much or more than I do. I certainly can't afford day care, or diapers, or formula, or...well, any of the associated expenses.
I simply don't like looking after children and I don't think I'd be a good mother. sweatdrop I used to babysit a bit when I was in high school, and although the kids seemed to like me just fine, I was ready to pull my hair out after only a few hours. I cannot imagine doing that job for the rest of my life...it sounds like my idea of hell, to be honest.
I am very happy for you and your kids, GRM. :3 People who ENJOY parenthood just...amaze me, and I find it beyond impressive that you can have three kids and still consider having more. Kudos to you, because it's definitely not something I would be able to handle.
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Posted: Mon Sep 13, 2010 3:40 pm
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Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 5:46 am
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Posted: Tue Sep 14, 2010 8:08 am
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You don't need any of that s**t. For Dante, who came out 11 lbs 1 oz, I had one shot of pain killer. Soaking in a bath is where it's at!
Does giving birth hurt? ******** ya. But what people don't tell you is that you can't remember the pain. If you asked someone who gave birth what it felt like, they can't remember, all they know is that it hurts, a lot. It's really weird because as soon as you hold your child for the first time, there's no pain at all. Just complete peace.
Also, that staying off your feet thing is horrible. You want to be active as long as possible. Working out doesn't harm the child at all in fact it helps to keep it, and you, healthy. If you stay off your feet the whole time you'll become a fatty. There are cravings that you NEED to satisfy, odd really, and if you're not doing anything to stay fit you'll just gain a s**t load of weight.
You know I would love to make a class for men and women about the truths and lies about being preggers.
Truthfully though, you don't need pain killers, it just helps you stay more calm. Oh and if you don't want to feel any of the pain of birthing just get an epidural.
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