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Vampires Vs. Chuck Norris Goto Page: [] [<] 1 2 3 ... 4 5 6 7 [>] [»|]

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WhoWould Win?
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wakusei
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:47 pm
    I'd have to say Mr. T as Omni has mentioned.

    Chuck Norris jokes ran their good run, but I'm about done with 'em.
    I like the Twilight series, but I guess to a much more casual extent then other fans I tend to come across....
 
PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:49 pm
Yeah, Chuck Norris jokes are overused... but know who's better than Mr. T?
Jareth, the goblin king! =D
'Cause Mr. T doesn't have magic powers, a kingdom, and a bunch of incompetent puppets for subjects >.<  

Lobo-chan


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:54 pm
You know what?! No one can beat Sean Connery >.> cause he is the only one

EDIT: or Morgan Freeman..........Wait! Sean Connery vs. Morgan Freeman ?! O.O who would win? now thats a battle o.o  
PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 7:56 pm
    Yeah, but Jareth is just a character. Now David Bowie.... He could...uh...glam rock them all to death?


Viral C
You know what?! No one can beat Sean Connery >.> cause he is the only one

    He's the man now, dog.

    Morgan Freeman couldn't fight. But he could definitly narrate a fight.
 

wakusei
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Jafthasleftthebuilding
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PostPosted: Tue Dec 16, 2008 10:45 pm
To Chuck Norris, Brokeback Mountain isn't the name of a movie about two gay men, it's what he calls the pile of dead ninjas he has in his backyard.  
PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 1:08 am
Viral C
You know what?! No one can beat Sean Connery >.> cause he is the only one

EDIT: or Morgan Freeman..........Wait! Sean Connery vs. Morgan Freeman ?! O.O who would win? now thats a battle o.o


It would obviously end in a tie, but only because Christopher Walken and Samuel L. Jackson would jump in and the powers of awesome would therefor all cancel out the others people awesome. No one could win.  

AlcoholicPancake
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YunieCookie

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 2:57 pm
According to the GD, Chuck Norris is more likely to win.

Also, I'm wondering if I should change the poll options here, just to be sneaky ninja  
PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 7:31 pm
YunieCookie
So, my English teacher saw the Twilight movie this past weekend, and my class had a huge discussion about it.. One of the people in my class REALLY does not like the entire thing >>
This spawned a conversation (though I have NO IDEA how..) about Chuck Norris vs. Vampires between the people sitting near me (including the Twilight-hating person..)

So ATG:
Who do you think would win?
How do you think they would win?
Do you like the Twilight series? (I think there's already a thread for this, but, oh well, it's relevant)
Chuck Noris jokes, do you have a favourite?
Vampires, of course.  

pumalily


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 17, 2008 8:15 pm
No way could a shiny vampy's teef pierce the skin of Chuck Norris LOL  
PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:59 am
I'm along with the apparently minority in this thread who think Chuck Norris jokes are over used I mean... they're just not that funny anymore.

And with that said, since real life Chuck Norris kind of well... sucks I'm betting even the Twilight vampires could beat him. Beating Sean Connery on the other hand... I mean that man is made of awesome so he wins hands down... or Morgan Freeman... or Mr T... or anyone that awesomely cool.  

Sanzoskitsune
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Omnileech

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:13 am
CHuck Norris
Atheists from England to the West Coast of America are stepping up their efforts this year to make a bigger antagonistic splash on the Christmas scene. From London and Washington, D.C., buses to Colorado billboards, skeptics are skewering religions with little respect to the adherents of the religions.

At the forefront is a group's government-sanctioned posting of a sign by a Nativity scene in the Capitol of Washington state (and now also in Wisconsin and Illinois): "At this season of THE WINTER SOLSTICE may reason prevail. There are no gods, no devils, no angels, no heaven or hell. There is only our natural world. Religion is but myth and superstition that hardens hearts and enslaves minds."

I am a patriot, and I believe that atheists are free to believe, speak and post whatever they want. This is America, and that's their First Amendment right. But to do so with harassment and hatred under the guise of free speech is despicable. An anti-religious poster filled with spite is in no way equal to a religious symbol, such as a Nativity scene. Where are the political correctness police when religious followers are the victims?

If such words were written against any social minority group, protests would be ubiquitous. But anti-religious bigotry is in vogue these days. Still, there is absolutely no justification for these atheists' written revile. And if they want to keep using hate-filled language against theists -- particularly Christians -- then they shouldn't be surprised when they meet up with a yuletide (written) roundhouse kick.

Anyone can spew disdain for religion, but is that what America's Founders created our rights for? Just because they post such verbal vomit, does that demonstrate intellectual superiority or the type of moral decency our Founders hoped we would perpetuate?

What profit would there be if I posted a taunt that atheists had no vital part in the founding of our country? As Benjamin Franklin noted in his 1787 pamphlet for those in Europe thinking of relocating to America: "To this may be truly added, that serious religion, under its various denominations, is not only tolerated but respected and practiced. Atheism is unknown there."

What profit would there be if I posted a claim that atheists are un-American because they try to suppress theists' freedom of religion by the false notion of separation of church and state?

What profit would there be if I posted the accusation that atheists are imprudent because they exhaust too much time trying to convince everyone else of the absence of a being who doesn't exist?

What profit would there be if I posted a retort that atheists are igmos because they try to replace Christmas with winter solstice celebrations, which are ancient pagan festivals entrenched in polytheistic religions?

What profit would there be if I posted that atheism hides behind a false pretense that it is scientific when eminent scientist Paul Davies -- the renowned British-born physicist, agnostic and professor of cosmology, quantum field theory and astrobiology -- once spoke against the certainty of atheism to Time magazine (in the column "Science, God, and Man"): "Agnosticism -- reserving judgment about divine purpose -- remains as defensible as ever, but atheism -- the confident denial of divine purpose -- becomes trickier. If you admit that we can't peer behind a curtain, how can you be sure there's nothing there?"

What profit would there be if I posted that atheists are totally blind to the pristine beauty and ordered complexity of creation, so they cannot see the hand of a Creator? As the Bible pointed out 2,000 years ago, "For since the creation of the world, God's invisible qualities -- his eternal power and divine nature -- have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse."

What profit would there be if I posted the fact that atheists denigrate every religion and prayer that ever has been offered? To say God doesn't exist is to say every religious leader in every age was delusional at best. And it also is to say that not one prayer on any continent in any era of human history has been answered. That premise alone rules atheism preposterous and foolish.

Finally, what profit would there be if I posted that I agree with my friend Mike Huckabee, who said on his book tour via Fox News that atheists shouldn't be fighting for a holiday in December when they already have a holiday: April Fools' Day (a holiday also grounded in sacred Scripture, "The fool says in his heart, 'There is no god'")?

We all know I would be labeled as an extremist, irrational and a bigot if I posted any of the preceding ideas. Yet atheists do and get away with First Amendment murder.

I'd like to remind our nation that it was only a short time ago when Ronald Reagan freely spoke for the majority by explicitly and passionately conveying belief in Jesus Christ during his presidential Christmas addresses. Compare the message in his Dec. 23, 1981, speech with that of the present day, when the very term "Christmas" is being erased from every corner of culture.

As long as different displays line the corridors of Washington state's Capitol like Christmas potpourri, let me posit this last idea as a final pre-Christmas posting. At the base of the bust of George Washington (which stands between the atheists' winter solstice sign and the Nativity scene in the Washington state Capitol), I suggest the posting of one more sign, which would contain the wisdom from George Washington's farewell address: "Of all the dispositions and habits which lead to political prosperity, religion and morality are indispensable supports. In vain would that man claim the tribute of patriotism, who should labor to subvert these great pillars of human happiness, these firmest props of the duties of men and citizens."


See, this is why he sucks.

Mr. T are least is so awesome that he regularly ignores the laws of physics.  
PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 8:51 am
Vampires! Chuck Norris is the Devil in disguise. All Vampires would destroy him! Of course a Vampire wouldn't suck his blood because who knows what kind of disease would plague the Vampire race.  

Spokane Native 2609

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 9:18 am
User Image

Y'know, for a while I didn't actually know who the hell Chuck Norris was. I mean, he's not important, really.

And as for the quite that Omni posted from him, that only serves to lower my view of him.


@Topic: Neither would win, because Vampires don't exist and Chuck Norris sucks.

biggrin

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 12:13 pm
Who cares about his political views, he is still the greatest man ever. Omni is just a tool for the left anyway we can't trust his views at all!  

Saverio C.

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Omnileech

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 19, 2008 12:26 pm
Saverio C.
Who cares about his political views, he is still the greatest man ever. Omni is just a tool for the left anyway we can't trust his views at all!


Uh huh. Sure. Tool of left for caring about a person, not a lame internet meme that's grown almost as stale as your shtick.  
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