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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 12:56 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 1:13 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 1:29 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 1:58 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:07 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:21 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:45 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 2:59 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 3:10 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:24 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:26 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:28 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:31 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:33 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 4:36 pm
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Initially, I found the introduction to the paper confusing. Though the short narrative piece is well done, it doesn’t fit well with the academic tone of the paper and does not alert the reader to the fact that this is going to be an academic paper. Additionally, the introduction needs to be strengthened. The introductory paragraph needs to let the reader know exactly what to expect for the rest of the paper. If the paper is going to deal with wolf-myths and the Quileute tribe and how these ideas relate to issue in Fools Crow, Twilight, and Power, then this needs to be in the introductory paragraph. The introductory paragraph also needs to answer a “so what?” question. What makes this topic important, worth writing about, or worth reading about? How do all of these ideas come together, and what is their significance. This should be the topic of the thesis statement. Additionally, you want to make sure that each of your paragraphs clearly ties back to the thesis statement in a way that is concise and straightforward for the reader.
Okay, I can agree with the fact that the beginning of my introduction didn't seem like an academic paper, but more of a fictional story. So I can work on getting rid of that part.
Hmm... I do mention about wolf-myths and the Quileute tribe... but I guess I should include information about the other texts. As for the "so what?" - I already addressed that in the thesis. rolleyes
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