⎾ MOROSIS ⏌

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Tonight had been nothing but a disaster and he had only himself to blame. He had wanted to take Abel out and for them to have a good time. Instead, all he could do was talk about Kieran, ask about work, and make everything awkward. He felt as though he ruined everything and wouldn't blame Abel if he wanted to leave. As the waitress took care of the bill, he sipped on his drink while Abel focused on his milkshake. At least he was able to get something right tonight. Another minute or so passed, and the waitress soon returned with his card, two slips of paper, and a pen. "Alright, well thank you for coming out tonight. I hope you enjoyed everything and have a lovely evening. Jakob smiled his thanks before she left them. He then filled out the merchant slip, and pocketed the customer copy. He replaced his card in his wallet and glanced across the table, wondering if Abel wanted to finish his shake here or take it with him. "Ready?"

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



It didn't take long for the waitress to return with Miguel's card along with the check to finish completion. He sat enjoying his milkshake which was hardly easy to screw up. Abel watched as Miguel thanked the waitress before she left. He waited in no rush as Miguel placed his card back in his wallet before pocketing it. Abel felt eyes on him as Miguel soon turned his attention toward him and questioned him. He nodded as he moved to stand, he finished off the rest of his milkshake quickly before setting his cup on the table. Abel didn't feel like carrying it all the way back to Miguel's apartment even though it wasn't that far.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

With the bill settled and their plates taken, Jakob didn't see much reason for them to linger. He didn't mind if Abel wanted to stay and finish his shake. But when he asked him, he watched as Abel quickly drink the remainder of his dessert and stood from his seat. Sliding out of his own, Jakob put his wallet back into his pocket and led the way out of the restaurant. He passed through the doors and into the night air. It was much quieter out here than before. Some surrounding shops had closed for the night and it seemed that the restaurant was about ready to do the same. Jakob took the lead to get them back to his apartment. He hoped that Abel would continue to stay with him tonight. He didn't want him to go, but he understood if he no longer felt welcome.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



With their meal done and paid for, Abel stood to leave. He waited for Miguel before following after him. Abel stepped outside to see that it was getting later and there was hardly any activity. He followed beside Miguel to the walk back to his apartment. It continued in silence as it seemed they were done talking. Abel was used to silence with Kirean however with Miguel he hated it. He knew he had upset Miguel although he wasn't sure how to fix it.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Stepping out into the still night air, Jakob took the lead to get them back to his apartment. It was now noticeably quieter with few people walking the street and some shops having closed for the night. Jakob walked by the males side, the silence still weighing on them. He didn't like when things got quiet, it usually meant something was wrong and he had screwed up. He wanted to reach out and take Abel's hand like before. At least on the walk over it was a good kind of quiet, one that was filled with giddiness and stolen glances. Now, he didn't know what to do. They were nearly a quarter of the way from the restaurant when Jakob glanced towards Abel then back towards the road ahead. "I'm sorry for bringing up Kieran so much." he said, at last breaking the silence. "I didn't mean to ruin dinner." He didn't know why this was so hard. His mind kept going back to Abel's question. He knew how he wanted him to miss him, but he didn't want to say it out loud. He was scared that what he felt would once again be one-sided.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



As they walked in silence, Abel too had wanted to reach out to Miguel. He didn't like becoming uncomfortable with him. Abel knew Miguel wasn't completely to blame for how things turned out. He continued down the sidewalk with Miguel. Abel could feel Miguel's eyes on him before he spoke. He listened as Miguel spoke, apologizing. Abel didn't understand what Miguel was thinking. He didn't know what to say that wouldn't start another argument. Abel reached down to take Miguel's hand. He laced their fingers together as he continued walking alongside Miguel.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

Walking along side Abel, he felt it easier to apologize. He may not have been the only one to blame, but he certainly hadn't helped matters what with all his talk about his ex. He knew that Abel had some sort of jealousy towards the man, though he didn't exactly understand it. He had hoped with him starting to talk Abel might say something in return. Instead he was only given silence. Jakob was about ready to give up for the night when he felt a hand take his own. He glanced down as Abel laced their fingers together and held on tight to him. Jakob smiled to himself and leaned up and over to press a kiss to the male's cheek.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



While Abel was jealous of Kirean, he was not about to explain such feelings. He didn't blame Miguel for talking or asking questions about Kirean. It had been only reasonable. Abel had been nothing but a target to Miguel initially. However over time, he'd become someone Miguel had relied on. He was hardly someone to like much less love.

Taking Miguel's hand in his own, Abel didn't exactly want to talk though he wasn't upset with Miguel. Perhaps it was merely jetlag finally settling in. He felt Miguel lean over and kiss his cheek as they walked. Such a kiss was simple though he didn't want to push it as he continued walking.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

At this point he wasn't expecting any sort of explanation for their jealousy of one another. Kieran had never offered to explain away his jealousy and Abel rarely gave him straight answers when asked. Now, he didn't see how it mattered as much. He'd been broken up unofficially with Kieran for over two years. Looking back, his relationship with Abel had taken some weird turns. He'd gone from being curious, to absolutely hating him, back to curious, and somehow starting to like him. He wasn't sure he could call what he felt for him love, but it definitely something stronger than a normal friendship.

As they continued the rest of the block, Abel took his hand while they walked. In response, Jakob leaned over to peck a kiss to his cheek. He wasn't expecting any sort of reaction. It was his own way of showing affection, as well as apologizing for being such a mess. He didn't care if Abel didn't understand the meaning and wanted to think it was harmless. It was late and the poor man was likely beyond exhausted. Anything they had to say to one another could wait.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



Abel didn't want to overthink right now. He chose not to question Miguel about his affection. Abel knew it wasn't surprising. He continued down the sidewalk. Abel wasn't exactly tired, it was still early in the morning. He couldn't say if he'd sleep anytime soon. Abel though guessed the same for Miguel who had slept all day.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

He could understand not wanting to overthink right now. To be fair, Jakob also didn't want to overthink this whole night. He didn't want to think about how he could be misinterpreting Abel's words or his actions. Nor did he want to think about how even if his feelings were reciprocated, he still couldn't have what he wanted. It was easier to care about him like this with no strings attached. Holding on to the male, Jakob led them from the first block and on to the second. He wondered if Abel would want to sleep or shower when they got back. Personally, Jakob wasn't too tired. Even if he was, he didn't think that he would be able to sleep. His mind was too busy to allow it.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



Indeed their feelings for one another were not likely to be reciprocated. Both were at different points in their lives. It was easier to ignore such thoughts than act on them. He didn't want to give Miguel hope for what he could not provide.

The idea of a shower sounded welcoming, however he didn't want to intrude. They hadn't really discussed if he would be staying with Miguel or would he need to find his own accommodation. He didn't want to assume. Abel continued walking with Miguel down the street toward his apartment.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

The last thing he needed tonight was more heartache. Jakob already knew that by telling Abel his feelings for him would be a waste. He didn't want to have a long distance relationship or to be caught up in in his world again. Living without a target on his back...it was kind of nice. Jakob couldn't ask Abel to leave all that, no matter how much he cared about him. He imagined Abel would sooner die in that field that leave it. Hell, he nearly did and he still went back.

It seemed to late to go out looking for a hotel room. He didn't mind sharing his bed and shower with him. But he understood if Abel wanted his own space, his privacy. To this day it baffled him how Abel had allowed him to practically take over his bedroom when he was injured. Especially after reopening the wound when trying to make his grand exit. He never forgot the look on Abel's face when he found him in his office, attempting to close the wound with nothing more than a few lousy staples. Abel may not have been a medical professional by any stretch, but he had saved him that night. For that alone he would always have a place in his home.

 

[xDarkWinterx]

⋮ ۩ ) • • • ❛ 𝙅𝙪𝙙𝙜𝙚, 𝙅𝙪𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙀𝙭𝙚𝙘𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙧.❜



To leave his life would be completely hard. He wasn't entirely rich to live with the money he had for the rest of his life. Abel though wasn't prepared to find a job to provide for his way of life. He knew that his way of life would likely get him killed as it almost had though he still continued. Abel wasn't ready to leave though he didn't know if there would be a point that he would.

He hardly wanted his own privacy though understood if Miguel wanted his own. Abel found it only fair to intrude. He didn't want to deal with the issue of finding a hotel, much less leaving Miguel alone. Abel could invade Kirean's hotel though he wasn't in the mood to deal with him. He wasn't entirely thrilled by the idea of getting Kirean and Miguel together for a conversation either. Abel didn't want to think about it too much. He continued walking with Miguel down the street.

 

[Pure Acid Dreamer]

It was only fair that Abel was able to invade his space. After all, he had taken up more than his share of Abel’s own while he was temporarily living with him. Besides, it was late and he was likely tired. It would be rude to send him out to fend for himself. If need be, Jakob could crash on the couch and allow Abel to take his bed. He wondered if Abel did leave, where he would go. Surely not to stay with Kieran. Then again, the idiot would deserve it. Jakob could only imagine what sort expression Kieran would have if Abel were to suddenly show up outside his hotel room. A part of him wished he could witness that, then again he supposed he would be able to whenever Abel set up their meeting.