Stress at home and how to deal with it

[Roland Karloseth]

Tell me, exactly what does freedom mean...

I have done so. The only option is to wait for now. My dad got a payraise this year, and we will probably lose the medicaid anyway. at that time my dad will HAVE to put them on the insurance his work provides and I will get my insurance from my college. Then I will be free to get a job and move out.

...if I'm not free to be as twisted as I want to be?

 

[lazycommie]

Sanzoskitsune

lazycommie

Sanzoskitsune

lazycommie

Sanzoskitsune

@Lazy I'm sorry I have a huge problem with the whole "screw your siblings" mentality, especially since it sounds like they haven't done him any wrong. I don't think its right to advice him to let his siblings health insurance disappear just because he's having problems with his mom.

My reasoning for saying that is simple. Why should his siblings be his responsibility? He's not the parent.

No but that doesn't mean they should have to suffer either. Look I grew up helping take care of my little sister, I have no obligation to take care of her or make sure she has anything but if I can protect her or help her I will. It's not about obligation its about wanting to take care of people you love because you love them.

He has no obligation to them. Frankly, his well-being, at this point in his life, should be priority 1, with family a distant second. The situation he's in now isn't exactly benefitting anybody except possibly his mom.

And frankly, it's his mom's responsiblity, not his, to be taking care of his siblings.

I'm not saying he has an obligation, I'm saying I understand not wanting to leave the people you love in the lurch. Yes its his mom's responsibility but that doesn't mean he doesn't want to protect them. And yes he should be his own top priority and take care of himself but that doesn't mean family should be a distant second. It's not like he's being physically abused or anything either, he's having problems with his mom and its a stressful situation that he needs to get out of true. It is not like his life is in danger though.

And I have to ask, just to understand where your coming from, do you have siblings? and if so, do you get along with them?

My logic is that he can't do much now, so unless he changes the situation to where he can, he can't help them much at all. The best thing he could do to help any of them would be move out and then go from there.

As for my siblings, I have a brother and two half-sisters. My half-sisters I've met all of once, and are the result of my father "setting up franchises". I don't know them and don't have much of an opinion about them. My brother is pretty much a miniature version of my father, to the extent that if I could get away with it I'd kill him just to be rid of him and his wasteful, useless existence. Same goes for my father, as well.

I also have a "sister", who's not blood but I consider her family. I think highly enough of her that it sorta balances out my utter hatred of my brother.  

[Sanzoskitsune]

@Roland yeah that sounds like a good idea. If that's gonna happen anyway. You should start looking for a job now then, even if it'll be a while before they take away the medicaid, it'll be awhile before you find a job. That's my suggestion at least.

@Lazy see that actually does a lot to explain your reasoning to me. I'm very close to my sister and I can't imagine doing anything that would cause her harm in any way, even if its as simple as her just not having medical insurance for a while. I'd also like to point out that there's a difference between not being able to do anything to help, and doing something that in the end... is kind of damaging to his siblings. I don't see how causing his siblings to lose medicaid when he's not sure they'll get another kind of medical insurance is the best thing.  

[lazycommie]

Sanzoskitsune

@Lazy see that actually does a lot to explain your reasoning to me. I'm very close to my sister and I can't imagine doing anything that would cause her harm in any way, even if its as simple as her just not having medical insurance for a while. I'd also like to point out that there's a difference between not being able to do anything to help, and doing something that in the end... is kind of damaging to his siblings. I don't see how causing his siblings to lose medicaid when he's not sure they'll get another kind of medical insurance is the best thing.

He gets a job. He moves out a couple months later. They either wind up back on medicaid(due to him being out of the house) or, better, his father steps up and puts them on his plan.  

[Sanzoskitsune]

lazycommie

Sanzoskitsune

@Lazy see that actually does a lot to explain your reasoning to me. I'm very close to my sister and I can't imagine doing anything that would cause her harm in any way, even if its as simple as her just not having medical insurance for a while. I'd also like to point out that there's a difference between not being able to do anything to help, and doing something that in the end... is kind of damaging to his siblings. I don't see how causing his siblings to lose medicaid when he's not sure they'll get another kind of medical insurance is the best thing.

He gets a job. He moves out a couple months later. They either wind up back on medicaid(due to him being out of the house) or, better, his father steps up and puts them on his plan.

....ok did you read the part where he said that if he left they would lose the medicaid? They wouldn't just lose it from him getting a job but from him leaving too. With that said, it looks like his dad will have to step up anyway since he's getting a raise so that seems to be taken care of. I figure if that's gonna be taken care of then yeah he should get a job and move out. But like I said I understand not wanting to harm his siblings by taking away their medicaid through his own actions.  

[lazycommie]

Sanzoskitsune

lazycommie

Sanzoskitsune

@Lazy see that actually does a lot to explain your reasoning to me. I'm very close to my sister and I can't imagine doing anything that would cause her harm in any way, even if its as simple as her just not having medical insurance for a while. I'd also like to point out that there's a difference between not being able to do anything to help, and doing something that in the end... is kind of damaging to his siblings. I don't see how causing his siblings to lose medicaid when he's not sure they'll get another kind of medical insurance is the best thing.

He gets a job. He moves out a couple months later. They either wind up back on medicaid(due to him being out of the house) or, better, his father steps up and puts them on his plan.

....ok did you read the part where he said that if he left they would lose the medicaid? They wouldn't just lose it from him getting a job but from him leaving too. With that said, it looks like his dad will have to step up anyway since he's getting a raise so that seems to be taken care of. I figure if that's gonna be taken care of then yeah he should get a job and move out. But like I said I understand not wanting to harm his siblings by taking away their medicaid through his own actions.

I did not miss that part. See, it's not when he leaves that they lose medicaid, but rather when he gets a job. It's income based. They can reapply for medicaid after he leaves and should be able to get it(depending on where they fall now).

Since his dad is likely to step up anyway, the whole issue is moot.  

[Sanzoskitsune]

Um... no he said that if he LEFT they would lose Medicaid, since well.. I asked what would happen if he left. My guess is if that's the case then its not just income based but based on how many people are in the home.  

[TieselGirl09]

Sanzoskitsune

Um... no he said that if he LEFT they would lose Medicaid, since well.. I asked what would happen if he left. My guess is if that's the case then its not just income based but based on how many people are in the home.

That's stupid being based on how many people are in the home!


x

 

[Roland Karloseth]

TieselGirl09

Sanzoskitsune

Um... no he said that if he LEFT they would lose Medicaid, since well.. I asked what would happen if he left. My guess is if that's the case then its not just income based but based on how many people are in the home.

That's stupid being based on how many people are in the home!


x

It's based off of both, actually. The total family income divided by the number of people in the home.  

[Izumi Iris]

I would have said no, left and brought her a masseuse ^^

But agreed, she's out of her damn mind.
My dad is a bad drunk, and he constantly asks me to come out of my room, down the hall and pass him to get to the kitchen so I can refill his glass.  

[Roland Karloseth]

Tell me, exactly what does freedom mean...

Well, it seems to me that she enjoys yelling. She just got done yelling at me because MY laptop powercord is screwed up (nevermind the fact that I got it for christmas, and it used to be HERS-she is the one who screwed it up in the first place) Her excuse is that she told me to be careful with it, and I have. It's just screwed up.

...if I'm not free to be as twisted as I want to be?

 

[Izumi Iris]

Possibly. You are the older one... so she probably feels like yelling is the only way to get you to talk. And she's crazy.. 3nodding  

[Roland Karloseth]

Tell me, exactly what does freedom mean...

She is. You wouldn't normally expect someone who is on VICADIN to be so angry all the time though.

...if I'm not free to be as twisted as I want to be?

 

[Izumi Iris]

Lol. My puppy is on vicodin right now ^^  

[Roland Karloseth]

Tell me, exactly what does freedom mean...

Why is puppy on Vicodin?

Also: xd *points to your siggy*

...if I'm not free to be as twisted as I want to be?