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I'd like to get this off my chest now...


What the hell is up with everybody subtle being anti-German in the past two weeks?! You don't DO that! Especially when you're talking a girl with a name (first AND last) that's more German than apple pie is American. gonk
I seriously get pissed off when people are inclined to hate Germans in my Jewish Community because of the Nazis. Okay, so the Nazis were German. But not many Germans are Nazis today. If you are, you get shot in the balls. When we were in Yad Vashem, the Holocaust Memorial Museum in Israel, a German tour group was behind us, and the guide kept saying "And the Nazis did this...and the NAZIS did that." OBVIOUSLY Germans don't feel that way nowadays.
I asked my teacher why she felt so angry about being offered a trip to Germany when she was telling a story about it.
And she said "Well, it's Germany."
And I said "What's wrong with Germany?"
I could tell she was trying not to be a bigot, and I applaud her for actually recognizing the pure anger in my voice, which was very calm, but still.


The other day when I was putting things up for the art show, my friend was insulting me as a joke. The last insult she said was "You're German". I beat her up. Well, as well as I could without being unfair, since she had her right arm in a sling. (She can punch like a mother with either arm).

scream scream scream I AM A FREAKING JEW SO I AM THEREFORE NOT A NAZI. THE NAZIS WERE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE HOLOCAUST. THE GERMANS OF TODAY WERE NOT INVOLVED. I AM A GERMAN BEFORE I AM A JEW. I AM A GERMAN. I AM NOT BIASED. I AM NOT A HATE-MONGREL.


Okay. I needed to do that to avoid screaming at the next person who gets on my nerves.

But we always beat each other up. 4laugh

I've said it once, and I'll say it again, I'm a semi sado-masochist. xd

I dunno, a lot of Germans i have spoken too are willing to talk about it, but in a very shameful and apologetic kinda way. I think its kinda sad ^_^

I finally understand something now.

My mother overreacts a bit.
A few pages ago I talked about how she freaked out about how I lost some white gloves in the snow at a neighbor's house.
Ofcourse she yelled at us for it and wouldn't let it go untill later.
She yelled that we were screwed, she took the computer priviledges, she gave us this burning hell looks, it was just an overall horrible time.
Why? She overreacts.

Sadly, I realized that I took this. And it kicked in during math class.
No, I don't angry overreact.
I sad overreact.
I break down into tears.
I only cried a little in Math and nobody except Hannah and the one I was talking to and being bullied by at that time, Darcy, noticed. Only a few tears.
But I still cry.

I think my mother and I, the way our minds work could potentially be this.
We'll take in some information.
If it makes her angry (or in my case, sad or depressed) the mind will take one aspect that could possibly be a reason for the feeling, and said aspect will be intensified aswell as intensify the emotion. Thus causing our overreaction and taking in a problem worse than it truly is.

This is bad for me.
Not because I'm thus more fragile.
Not because I'm under the control of a mother who overreacts.
But because of both.

To make matters worse, I have this fear of crying in public.
Hell, I have a fear of crying infront of ANYONE, EVEN family!


>.> I hate yooooou miiiiind!

lolz biggrin great idea for a thread

Aw Egga. D: I have quite a bit of German in me too but no one really brings it up because my last name is French. No one knows I'm German unless I (very proudly) say so. And "April" isn't very German either. xp

We had a few German exchange students at my high school and no one gave them any s**t about Nazism at all. They were very nice people, and so we were nice back. But, I do come from a small town where everyone is pretty closely knit. We do have our share of assholes, but we're nothing compared to the kids from some schools. stare