Why Did You Divorce the Person Above You?

[Kalstolyn]

Because you wouldn't stop acting jealous when I wore other hats.  

[CR Kyrie]

Because my threads became so ridiculously popular that you just couldn't handle my fame anymore, and became very unlovable, and I just couldn't deal with it anymore.  

[Taeryyn]

Because you kept singeing the bed-sheets. I do, and I do, and I DO for you, scrimping and saving to buy 1000 thread-count egyptian cotton sheets, and what do you do? You traipse into bed all fiery and wreck it all! Even the pillow shams, goddamn you, EVEN THE PILLOW SHAMS! WHY?! WHY THE SHAMS, RANUU? WHYYYYYYY?  

[Kalstolyn]

Becauthe you wouldn't thtop lithping and it wath getting on my nerveth.  

[pickle relish]

You never told me you were a woman. It's illegal for women to be married in this state, and I'm not moving to Canada for you, Kalsie-poo. I'm sorry, but this is the end for us.  

[Red Glacier]

Your fear of rain has ruined a night out for the last time!  

[Kerrigan_dragon]

Because.... I find your lack of face disturbing. D< (Love you Viral. x3)

ninja It's a Star Wars reference, don't you see? Replace face with faith.... Darth Vader said it.... Come on, am I the only one who remembers this quote? D: ninja  

[Red Glacier]

Because every time we hugged I got impaled too!

(Love you too :3)  

[pickle relish]

Because you kept making fun of my fear of the rain! It's a legitimate fear, dude!! Geez!! >.<  

[Kalstolyn]

Because you refused to immigrate even though I clearly live in the superior country. And also because you thought I was a dude? srsly?! Do you know any other dudes with such humongous luscious breasts? gonk  

[pickle relish]

Yes, and I'm leaving you for him.  

[Kerrigan_dragon]

Because you always wore that bloody skirt, even to bed. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO GET IT ON WHEN YOU'RE WEARING THAT SKIRT?! D: So I guess you could say I'm leaving you because I'm dissatisfied with our physical relationship. *sniffs indignantly*  

[Red Glacier]

No matter how hard I try to be colorful with you always say you're better than me

(X3)  

[Kerrigan_dragon]

I'm divorcing you because you make small grammatical errors that don't actually inhibit one's ability to understand what you're saying. 3nodding Like you should have said "No matter how hard I try to be colourful with you, you always say you're better than me."

Geez Louise! >.<

(>w< love you V)  

[Red Glacier]

I'm divorcing you again because I am tired of paying tickets for you because of you dressing indecently in public!

(Love you too :3)