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 Posted: Fri Dec 14, 2007 11:43 pm
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Posted: Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:00 pm
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Posted: Sat Dec 22, 2007 9:22 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 4:56 pm
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Posted: Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:31 am
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 Nixsi:: -stares down at her hooves for a moment before looking back up into Kai's emerald eyes- I... -closes mouth again and looks away briefly before finding the courage to allow her gaze to fall upon the stallion again- Kai... so you have any feelings for me? -releases a small sigh; somewhat assuming a negative response from the stallion-
Kai: -pauses- "Probably not. And I have warned you before. I'm NOT nice whatever you may think. And I don't get involved with." He paused, as he gave the mare a glance from head to hoof. "With mares like you.. I prefer my tastes to be sophisticated by all means." His words were a subtle hint for Nixsi, that indicated by his tone and words that he had no feelings for the mare. But as easy as the words were to say.. It was no truth. Since the very first meeting, he had cared for the mare.
Nixsi:: -stares at Kai in disbelief- With mares like me? -is offended and attempts to glare at the stallion- You certainly make a convincing point when you say you aren't nice. Though I think your words really don't reach that deep. You aren't really like this Kai... -her voice softens and she tilts her head- No one can hide behind a facade forever....
Kai: Becoming slightly un-nerved by the mare's words, He scrambled to make a cunning reply. "I can make a convincing point because it is the truth. No matter how you look at it, darling." He said to the mare, his voice became cold and rough as he adopted a frosty expression. With a distasteful glance to the mare, "When did you know so much about me?" He asked, his tone mocking. "What makes you think it's all a facade?"
Nixsi:: -shakes her head persistently- No. It's not the truth. -refuses to allow herself to think that- ... Darling? -furrows her brow in confusion at the sudden name which Kai chose to refer to her as- 'He wouldn't call me darling if he didn't care in some way...' -ponders for a few moments as to why the stallion would choose such a name- I doubt I know a fraction of who you truly are; though I think you are simply trying to hide who you are because you are afraid.
Kai: Afraid? Is that what she thought of him? 'When will you stop believing in fairy tales?" He scorned, his expression twisting into one of disbelief. "Why would I hide who I am? What do I have to hide?" His tone, demanding and taunting. What did a mare know about him anyways? Granted he wasn't afraid, but there were a few that knew he hid behind a mask. It was impossible to believe that someone could see through his facade only after a few days time.
Nixsi:: -frowns- I can't stop believing when I don't think of it as a fairy tale. And I don't know why you'd try to hide it... But there is a saying that everyone has something to hide. -flicks her tail- Perhaps you carry it upon your shoulders as if it's your sole purpose to cover it up. Sometimes the past is painful; is that what you're trying to hide? -continues frowning as she stares at him-
Kai: "Perhaps you are too childish to understand the difference between a fairy tale and reality." He shot the comment at her, while sparks of anger flickered within his emerald green eyes. He stepped a few steps closer to the mare, until his frame over towered hers. He couldn't care less about her fairy tale dreams but her questions angered him. "What right do you have to my past?" He gritted his teeth slightly, and his words were curt. Nixsi was stepping beyond her boundaries, But never would he display such anger to a mare or any mare for that matter. He did NOT want to be called a brute by any means.
Nixsi:: You're the one being childish in my opinion. Though it's not as if my opinion matters to you in the least bit anyhow. -glares at the incorrigible stallion before quickly backing away from him a few paces as his expression changes to that of rage- I... -tries to find words- I don't necessarily have any right... And I'm not forcing you to share your past with me. I'm merely pointing out that you might be so reserved because of an incident that occurred in the past. And if that's the case... -frowns slightly as she tries to make Kai understand- Shouldn't you let it go?
Kai: Closing his eyes briefly, he was glad to see that his anger no longer boiled but only simmered at the top. He was relieved to see that she didn't pry into the issues further. "What if I did?" He said, his tone slightly accusing. "It's none of your business to ask in the first place. So if you COULD, please refrain from asking at all.. it would be most welcome." His eyes narrowed, as he watched her back away. She was asking too much of him.
If anything, he couldn't let go.. The memories still haunted him. Even if.. she no longer happened to reside in this world. His expression softened he recalled a memory. But the issue at hand was far more important than his memories. Snapping back to reality, "Childish..? How so?" He said, with such sarcasm that it was clear, that he didn't believe her.. "I am above such antics."
Nixsi:: -shakes her head and sighs- Why are you so determined to push me away Kai? I'm sorry if I have upset you by my inquiries but I only have felt the need to do so since I care about you. -wishes Kai would reciprocate her feelings though she doubts it possible- It's quite obvious. -glares- If you were to open your eyes and observe yourself you would understand exactly what I mean when I say you are being impolite.
Kai: "Pushing you away? I don't actually recall." He noted, raising an eyebrow. "As a matter of fact, we're talking now aren't we? We also happened to be talking before, but I do have other prior engagements, you know." He pointed it out to her. If she didn't cause so much trouble for him, he would have admired her keen perceptiveness. But nonetheless, It was incredibly troubling. He admitted to himself that her words of 'pushing her away' was indeed quite accurate.
He just wanted as much distance between them as possible.. From the start, he knew that she was too naive and innocent for her own good. it would result in both their downfalls, Logic dictated. There were far too much the opposites to ever get along. Unfortunately, he had followed his feelings rather than logic. Stepping back, "I can see myself. And I don't put myself above the behavior of being impolite. if I claimed to be polite, I would indeed acknowledge that I'm being impolite. But obviously, I didn't."
"Or do you just want attention Nix? Is that what you want?" He was aware that wasn't the real reason why she had come.. But his heart wouldn't to allow anyone to come close to it. All she wanted was to care for him, and from the first meeting. He had known that.. And yet, he had hurt her and he continued to do so.
Nixsi:: Nixsi furrowed her brow at the stallion; wondering if he was being manipulative or if he really wasn't aware of the emotional attachment she felt towards him. The mare's voice was nearly inaudible as she spoke. "If it hurts those around you... wouldn't you feel compassion and mentally try to stop yourself?" Perhaps Kai was too insensitive.... Though Nixsi doubted that. He understood that he was hurting her... At least only someone completely oblivious wouldn't realize that she was currently enduring pain. Kai lacked compassion Nixsi decided; either that or he choose to ignore the feelings he felt and she wondered how anyone could be capable of such. Again the stallion seemed to make it about her. She didn't want attention; apparently she hadn't made that clear enough. " I don't understand what you mean by that." The mare stated, shaking her head as she spoke. Kai certainly was a confusing stallion.
Kai: "It's exactly for the purpose, of why I don't keep anyone close to me. I'm only human. By no means, am I the devil." His voice softening, but his tone remained less than friendly. "I don't ask others to care for me .." One of the first truths to come out of his mouth and probably the last. "It's only for those who believe they can, only to end up with heartbreak or disappointment." He let his gaze drift over her, before turning away. The moon shone brightly .. but it only pained him to look at the moon. It was a night like this, that had encountered Nixsi.
But his words was the truth. He hadn't asked the mare to have feelings with him. If Nixsi had any feelings for him whatsoever, it was better to be heartbroken earlier than later. And he was certainly trying.. no other rake could blame him for the lack of not. "If you don't know what I mean by attention.. Allow me to enlighten you in easier words." he murmured as he walked up to her. With a whisper in her ear, 'If it isn't just attention you want, perhaps you prefer something more intimate?"
Nixsi:: The mare wondered how anyone could choose to be withdrawn from others and force themselves to endure solitude. Nixsi knew that she for one would not enjoy being alone constantly. And overly... Kai wasn't just attempting to be alone by avoiding others... The stallion implied his disposition was for the sake of pushing others away. The mare couldn't believe that her and the stallion seemed to be on completely opposite ends of the spectrum. "How can you sit there and convince yourself it's not your fault when you have affected someone else in such a way?" The mare's tone again was pleading; trying to reason with the stallion. He seemed so heartless and cruel... Nixsi frowned at Kai; still not understanding. "Sexual attention?" She repeated before shaking her head. "How on earth could you even suggest that I would desire attention in that form at a time like this." She wondered what would have made the stallion suggest such a preposterous thing.
Kai: "How delightfully boring." He thought out loud, with a sigh. "To answer your question, It ISN'T my problems when someone else's feelings interfere with their actions. I didn't ask FOR it, okay?" He shrugged, while shaking his head. "I don't convince myself. Like I said before, it's the truth. Believe it if you will. It doesn't affect me whether you do or not." His words rang loud in the air, as he glanced off in another direction before turning his focus back on the mare in front of him. But her pleading voice nagged at his consciousness. Pushing the annoying thought away, "If you won't provide me entertainment.. Than explain why I should even be here?" He said, with a questioning yet mocking stare.
Nixsi:: Nixsi frowned and continued to wonder just how the stallion was able to live with himself when he acted in such a manner. Didn't he feel even the slightest quiver of remorse or regret as he continued to say such harsh words? Kai was continuing to crush Nixie’s hopes of uncovering the side he choose to hide; though... the mare was beginning to think that side didn't exist. Perhaps what Kai had said was true... Perhaps she was simply wishing for a fairy tale; one that would never come true. Though... There was something in his tone that provided her with a flicker of hope. It would be impossible to inform another just exactly what it was. Suddenly though the stallion's words outraged the mare. Was this simply a game to him? "Entertainment?!" Her tone was defiant and extremely irritated. "Is that all you want out of this? Entertainment?" How could the stallion be so tactless; how could he even begin to think of sexual relations as entertainment.
Kai: "Life is entertainment." He said in a questioning tone. "As one often says says, Live life to the fullest." His manner was nonchalant. "But the question is how." He admitted a little slyly. "Sexual entertainment is fun AND it helps to pass the time. It's actually quite enjoyable. I'm not the only stallion .. or mare for that matter you'll find who enjoy the same things I do."
Nixsi:: Nixsi was become more and more infuriated by the stallion as he continued to speak. It really was as if this entire encounter was simply a game for him; nothing more than entertainment. "Sexual relations should not occur simply for the sake of entertainment or to pass the time." Her tone was matter-of-fact like and she wished that at this moment she were deaf so she didn't have to hear his opinion on the subject since it was rude in her opinion. "It's insulting to compare such relations and I can't believe you would say such a horrendous thing." The mare didn't know what to say; everything Kai was saying was making the mare angrier by the second though it wouldn't be becoming to act on her emotions when they were that of rage.
Kai: Now she was becoming angry? If it were anyone else, the conversation would have ended LONG ago on an angry note. "This will be quite a sight." He thought silently to himself, with a smirk. Interestiing. Or at least, the situation was becoming more so. "Believe it or not." He said with an amused smile upon his face. "It's like I told you before." He scoffed "Unlike the saying. Opposites DONT attract. As you can see, and I’m sure, being convinced.. You should give up by now.. Don't you think so?" His voice became slightly more enthusiastic, hoping that Nixsi WOULD give up on her ideas. And Hopefully, this would be the end of it.
Nixsi:: The mare couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Maybe they don't." She said; her tone cold as she glared at the stallion. The pair couldn't be more opposite even if they tried. Maybe it was time Nixsi did give up; after all if they weren't getting along now how would they ever? Though, that was what Kai wanted. He wanted her to forfeit and leave her alone and she supposed he would continue to treat everyone else how he was currently treating her in order to maintain his solitude. Yet Nixsi was one who cared about other's feelings and if he really wanted her to leave then maybe it was best if she did? Even though Kai had infuriated her she still couldn't help but to carry the feelings she had for him from close to the time when they had first met.
Kai: With a feeling of satisfaction, he watched as she gave up the fight. But something inside still nagged at him. Pulling back slightly, a few steps away from the mare. His determination wavered, as the mare became cold. Granted, that was the reaction that he was trying to get. But actually RECIEVING it was a different matter. Not that he wasn't used to a cold attitude, but it was as if the mare had done a complete turnaround in a matter of seconds. From pleading and gentle to irritation and cruelty.
.. But hadn't he done the same to her? Ignoring his facade for a moment, he sobered up, becoming serious. “What do you want from me?" He asked, his no longer mocking or angry. As if he was talking to someone, a friend rather seriously. But however serious he was, didn't mean that he would be friendly either.
Nixsi:: Nixsi was taken back by his question and his sudden change in tone. "I..." The mare stuttered; unable to find words. Her mouth quickly shut again. What did she want from him after all.... Clearly she wanted something since her mind had been pushing her to converse with the stallion even if it was futile. Nixsi knew that she possessed feelings for Kai... It made sense that she would want the same from him. Even if he wouldn't be able to feel the same for her it was her obligation to answer his inquiry. "I want you to feel something towards me... and if that means being in a relationship..." Nixsi paused for a moment as she considered the stallion. "Then that's what I want..." She concluded; her voice trailing off.
Kai: "I'll be truthful than, Nix. All I feel is friendship towards you. I can't give you the relationship you want. I can't give it to anyone." He was obviously frustrated with her request, letting his emotions show upon his face. He had known that a serious relationship was what she wanted. "It'd be better if we just said our good-byes here and now." He concluded the conversation with the statement. It was really too bad that she wasn't like other mares, but instead, had a sensible head on her shoulders. "At this rate.. You'll be the one hurt by this relationship If you, not I, should choose to continue it." He warned her.. Hoping she wouldn't get hurt. "You'll be better of if find someone else who can provide you with a family and a GOOD life. I'm not willing to offer myself in this exchange, which is precisely what you want." He struggled to sound composed, with a expressionless face. "All I'm willing to offer you in a night of pleasure." His voice soft, as he turned his head away. There was no doubt that she would refuse the stallion..
Nixsi:: The mare repeatedly shook her head; attempting to refrain from hearing the stallion's words. The mare was certain that the stallion had some sort of feelings for her even if he wouldn't admit it to her or himself. "No." She said; holding back the tears that would surely spill from her eyes at the thought of saying good bye so abruptly. They had parted a few times before and ran into each other but that wasn't a guarantee that after this they would meet again and the mare wasn't ready to give up on the stallion. "You won't be hurt at all?" She retorted; her tone resentful as she considered the stallion's words. She was already hurting and he was oblivious to her pain; the mare thought that she couldn't be hurt much worse than she already was by the stallion. She choose ignore his advice of finding another stallion; rather distraught and half listening to the stallion as she tried to gather her thoughts. "Now there's an idea." She added; even though she meant to be sarcastic her tone wasn't in the least due to her current state. "A night of pleasure." Her voice was that of a whisper as she repeated his words though not really considering what they meant.
Kai: Nixsi’s eyes appeared to glisten within the moonlight, he noticed out of the corner of his eye. he had dealt with enough mares to know that those were tears in her eyes.. He had seen many tears in the past, but he was hardly affect by it.. until now. But it was inevitable, that he would have hurt her. Everyone who came close to him with such intentions usually did/ He only kept a few genuine relationships, where both sides knew not to pry into the other's secrets. There were long and quiet moments, where Kai and his friend sat together in long silences. Simply.. understanding, without speaking.
But what COULD he have offered her? Nixsi wasn't thinking along the same lines that he was.. She didn't want a sort of friendship with an affair.. or so he had thought. He was quickly surprised by her words. "W-what?" He wasn't planning on this.. at all. Hell, it wasn't even a question this time! .. Nevertheless, the silence went on for a few moments before he finally replied with an answer. Didn't he just want to run away from this mare an hour ago? Jesus, what was wrong with him? He asked himself the question repeatedly, as he stepped back to take a look at his behavior. But despite his thoughts.. Lord knew, that he wanted it. If only she had refused.. He would have been able to walk away with regrets on his mind, but a peaceful life afterwards. But the point was, that she hadn't refused.
"Will you regret it?" His voice low, stepping close enough to the mare that they made body contact. Hesitantly, he reached out to her.. his face in her mane. He waited to see if she would shake him off or not.
Nixsi::The mare couldn't help but to let a few tears slid down the sides of her cheeks as she attempted to cope with all the emotions she felt. Nixsi was unable to look up at Kai face and therefore missed the vulnerable expression that seemed to grace his features. Was it possible that the stallion could be compassionate? She heard his question yet couldn't respond; everything was a blur and she didn't even know why he was asking 'What?'. Nixsi felt the stallion's neck arch over hers and she flinched at the sudden contact between them; she wasn't sure if she should be comforted by him or protest. The mare shook her head at the stallion final question though she wasn't sure exactly what she was getting herself into as she made the gesture.
Kai: Despite the sudden tenseness between both parties, he didn't move. "I don't know what I'm thinking.. or even what I'm doing." He muttered his emerald green eyes downcast. "But I suppose you may be acting the same way." After all her earlier protesting.. It was strange for her to be so quiet. But wasn't it the same for him? he observed quietly. After his evasive, and rude answers.. Why did he still do this? When the outcome could only result in grief.
Both of them knew.. that this wasn't right. but neither was it wrong. But who had expected a happy ending, or the typical love that couples usually had? Perhaps Nixsi had dreams like that once.. or still. No one could determine what the future would bring after all. He found those to be his last thoughts before the darkness fully enveloped them, like a blanket.
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Posted: Tue Jan 01, 2008 5:07 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 2:27 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 2:32 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2008 2:33 pm
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Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 11:29 pm
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Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 11:31 pm
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Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2008 10:49 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 4:43 pm
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Posted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 6:37 pm
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