The Guild's Incorrect Quotes

[MJ Spooks]

Harbinger: Leave me to do my dark bidding on the internet!

Dominique: What are you bidding on?

Harbinger: I'm bidding on a table.

source: What We Do In The Shadows
characters involved: Sasha "Harbinger" Dobrev, Dominique Bellamy-Hallwyd  

[MJ Spooks]

Dominique: I went into the lounge yesterday and there was blood all over my nice antique couch.

Dante: Which one? The red one?

Dominique: Well yes, it's red now.

source: What We Do In The Shadows
characters involved: Dominique Bellamy-Hallwyd, Dante "Bedlam" Ross  

[The Forgotten Weasley]

Hermolaos: //gets down on one knee//

Celeste: Oh my god, it's finally happening!

Hermolaos: //collapses//

Celeste: The poison is kicking in!

source : tumblr
characters involved : Celeste Kinsley, Hermit Lice  

[MJ Spooks]

Frida: This year, I lost my dear husband Olan

Olan's ghost: Stop telling everyone I'm dead!

Frida: Sometimes, I can still hear his voice.

source: Brother Bear
characters involved: Olan and Frida Borson  

[MJ Spooks]

Cel: //talking to Maura// Your mom is named mom…my mom is named mom… dude don’t freak out but I think we’re related

source : tumblr [x]
characters involved : Ceallachan O'Madaidhin, Agnes Maura McDonald  

[The Forgotten Weasley]

Random Cat: //meows//

Jesse: You sly b*****d, I never would have thought of that.

Jojo: I'm sorry, can he actually speak cat or is he just messing with us?

Elliott: Knowing him, it may very well be both.

source : SAO abridged
characters involved : Jesse Calvert, Jojo blake, Elliott Holt  

[Cinnabun Gryffie]

*at Hooters*

Milo: Where are all the f*cking owls?!?

Wyatt, to waitress: I'm so sorry



source : tumblr
characters involved : Milo Abrams, Wyatt Abrams  

[Cinnabun Gryffie]

James: Did you hit your brother with a ball?

Maya: Yeah.

James: And what should you say to him?

Maya: ... Duck?



source : tumblr
characters involved : James Masters, Maya Masters  

[Yukina101]

Sebastian: Ok, now close your eyes

Balder: //closes them//

Sebastian: Now what do you see?

Balder: Nothing

Sebastian: //choked up// That's my life without you, bro!

Balder: //chokes up// Bro...

source: tumblr
characters involved: Sebastian Blythe and Balder Borson  

[addaellis]

Vespera, over the phone: It’s Vespera.
Alex: What did she do this time?
Ves: No its Vespera, it’s actually me.
Alex: What did you do this time?

“He’s like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgement.”
—Jonah or Rhea about Rion, probably

Rhea: Tell her she’s cute, what’s the worst that could happen?
Jonah: She could hear me.

“My life isn’t as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like.”
--Rion, probably.

Rion: I’m the type of guy who likes to think things through!
Jonah: Remember that time you tried to eat a marshmallow while it was still on fire?

Ves: Why are we stopped?
Sona: The light’s red.
Ves: : THERE ARE NO RED LIGHTS IN A CAR CHASE!


source : tumblr
characters involved : Vespera Salazar; Alexander Mason; Jonah, Rhea and Orion Lane, Sonora Li  

[The Forgotten Weasley]

Vio: Top reasons for us to get married?

Ivy: Firmly saying 'THAT'S MY WIFE!' before knocking someone out in one punch. And love.

source : tumblr
characters involved : Violante Bishop, Ivy Bishop  

[The Forgotten Weasley]

Celeste: This isn't some simple task like say, riding a bicycle, or cracking an egg, or committing premeditated murder.

Finny: ...What was that last one?

Celeste: Cracking an egg.

source : tumblr
characters involved : Celeste Kinsley, Delphinia Meadows  

[Cinnabun Gryffie]

Wyatt: Truth or dare, James?

James: Dare, of course.

Wyatt: Kiss the prettiest person in the room

James: Milo?

Milo: (blushing) yes?

James: How the ******** do I kiss myself?


source : tumblr
characters involved : Wyatt Abrams, James Masters, Milo Abrams  

[Cinnabun Gryffie]

Kam: Hey Iggy, get me a drink from the kitchen

Iggy: Sure, what kind?

Kam: idk surprise me

Iggy: Here ya go

Kam: ....... this is a spider.


source : tumblr
characters involved : Kameron & Ignatius Hepburn