The lands were new.
That was something that made Kumul uneasy, but Cesa seemed happy. They’d split off from their group upon hearing about this place. It was an older pride - probably one of the oldest, as far as Kumul could tell. He couldn’t help but feel uncertain. Their home in the desert was one he has been born into.
But so was Cesa.
Cesa adapted more easily to change. She flourished in it. Kumul found this new area a bit daunting. It was similar in a way that gave him comfort, but just different enough to shove him into a fit of anxiety. He was glad that Cesa was patient with him. He sucked in a deep breath, settling off at the fringes of their new clan.
Mantis, it was called.
He’d wandered away from his mate earlier, trying to catch his barings and get himself together, but the anxiety only grew without his mate by his side. It bit at him like a fire. He missed his children and their group. He wondered if Ofke and Bozkir would join them soon. Would the rest of the group follow?
He swallowed against the feeling in his throat, trying to quell the tiny bit of trembling in his frame.
It was a sign of weakness. He couldn’t display that, not here. Not in a new place.
Kumul was so wrapped in his thoughts that he almost didn’t notice that someone had approached him from his left. He eyed the figure that appeared like a blurry shape next to him.
He tensed up, but the figure cleared as it neared.
“Cesa,” he breathed out softly. His frame trembled more freely when he saw it was her. He gave a small huffed sigh of relief, and Cesa gave him a small smile in turn.
“I thought I’d let you try to work through your thoughts on your own before I interupted them,” his mate spoke softly. It was a softness she only ever showed to him. She’d press her face sweetly against him and whisper sweet nothings at him and then turn around and rip the throat from a rival.
He felt safe around her.
Kumul smiled a bit. He was grateful she showed up before the anxious thoughts made themselves worse. “Thank you,” he said, quiet. He tembled against, pressing himself towards his mate. He could feel her bury her face into his mane, breathing him in a bit.
“Care to share your thoughts?” She asked, concerned lacing her voice. Her sweet mate wouldn’t tremble for no reason, after all. He was a warrior just as she was. He might be softer than she was, with more insecurities, but trembling was something he only did when something was very wrong.
Kumul shook his head though, frowning at his mate.
“Just... Taking more than I thought it would to adjust,” He murmured, mostly to himself. Like it was a secret he was trying to keep to himself. Cesa gave a small, understanding hum. She nuzzled into his mane, pressing her body more fully into his.
She gave a small comforting rumble. “Take as long as you need,” She told him. “It’s different from our old home. Softer, and kinder. It’ll take some time to drop our defenses.”
Kumul made a questioning noise, taking in the comforting weight against him and the scent of him mate until it filled all his senses. It made him feel like he was home again in the sun-baked desert. It almost made him feel homesick for that place, but that wasn’t quite it.
She gave a small chuckle.
“Of course. It’s a change for me, too. I’m sure this is the place for us, though.” She smiled against his fur. “We’ll get used to it, and this place will feel like home.”
Kumul’s shoulders sagged a bit. “You are my home, Cesa,” he said, sincere in every word. “I’ll be fine, I promise.”
She laughed against his fur. “You’re such a sap,” she pulled back to grin at him. He laughed too, pushing her over. She laughed even harder, but launched herself up to tackle him to the ground. She was pound for pound stronger than he was, bringing him down much easier.
Cesa laid her body across his. She smiled at him softly.
“I love you, Kumul,” the feeling bubbled in her chest, suddenly stronger than before. Kumul gave a soft, breathy laugh and reached his muzzle up to nuzzle his mate.
“I love you too, Cesa. With every part of my being.”
The two remained there at the fringes of the clan for the longest time, just taking in the presence of one another. She could feel Kumul’s tension start to leave his body. They hadn’t been this free in their affections until recently. Their old home had been a lot of watching your back.
The pair had grown up together, protecting one another from danger. Cesa had always been stronger, but Kumul would never mind that. He was so in love with his mate, he was glad to finally be able to show her how much.
Their first litter was small. The desert provided little nutrition and it was hard to keep a litter. Cesa had failed twice before she bore a litter of two. He remembered how tired she looked while she was nursing. She’d been so skinny after, but he could see the light of joy in her eyes.
That wouldn’t be a problem here. They are well enough, and there was a supply of water. One they didn’t have to battle to the death for. Cesa turned to face him, her body laying over nearly his entire body. He bumped his forehead to hers, giving a small smile.
“I was thinking...” He started, but the words caught in his throat. Cesa pressed into him a bit more, nuzzling his face and encouraging him to speak silently.
He gave her a small, shy smile. He started again, “I was thinking what it would be like, to raise a family here.”