[rider] Py'n of bronze Malnarth [Critiqued]

[Rhea Izar]

Name: Py'n (Pynsean)
Age: 28
Sex: M
Sexual Orientation: Bisexual, male leaning
Weyr: High Reaches Weyr
Rider Rank: Wingrider
Previous Rank/Craft: none
Physical Description:

Of average height and build with lean muscles, Py'n is a fighter. He has been boxing for years, finding it his favorite sport, and this is on top of carring for a very demanding bronze. He has shaggy black hair and tanned skin, and almost always has a smile on his face. His eyes are a blue-green in color, with long lashes.
Personality:
Py'n is a cheerful personality who loves a job well done, but tends to also find himself as a bit of a flirt. He's a hard worker who takes the 'play hard, work hard' saying to heart. The man enjoys lounging as much as he loves working, which bothers his dragon on many occassions. He can become rather selfish with his time, and usually has no problem saying 'no'.
Positive Trait List cheerful, friendly, hardworking
Negative Trait List selfish, flirtatious, distracted
History:
He exercises and boxes for fun. He was found as a candidate at the age of 8, and worked to make himself stronger, thinking he was destined to be a great dragonrider. It took a few years, but he finally impressed his powerful bronze. Together, they work to become the best fighters and flyers.
Other:


DRAGON
Name: Malnarth
Age: 13
Color: Bronze
Size: 45'
Physical Description:
A very large bronze, dark brown in color with markings similar to a skull mask on his face, making him look extra fierce
Personality:
Malnarth carries himself with confidence that comes from his size and position. He can be very stern and doesn't really get much humor. He's very dedicated and a hard worker, and was actually thrilled when Thread returned and dragons had a purpose again. He fights with an almost frightening fierceness. The only time he shows any softness is with young dragons, who he somehow tolerates and tries to impart his 'wisdom' onto.
Dragon Art or Proof of Obtainment:

Wanted Clutch:
3560.05.11 - Non-Affiliated Queen
Sioneth x Ruvath
19 Eggs
1 gold / 1 bronze / 1 brown / 5 blues / 11 greens  

[Masterharper]

Hey Rhea!

I think his history just needs a little bit more fleshing out, and then he should be good to go. He's 28 turns but it doesn't really tell much of anything about him. Where did he grow up? Who taught him boxing and a love of exercise? Was he good at it or did he require a lot of training? Did he do it for fun or for marks? Is he Holdborn or from High Reaches Weyr?

One thing to note is in our shop is our age minimum for Candidacy is 14 Turns old so you'll need to bump that up a little bit, sorry! gaia_star As for what happened after Impression, did he keep up his boxing when he could? Is his new focus on just training hard to become a great wingrider? Does he have more ambition than that? He's been a dragonrider for almost 14 Turns, so just getting a little better handle on what he's doing would be awesome and then he should be golden!