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 Posted: Wed Jun 11, 2008 7:52 pm
Okay it started out like this.....My Name is Ally, I met this guy, he's totally cute and i wanna go out with him, but i'm super shy, What should i do? Then more Drama was added to the mix..... so it looked like this....I'm totally inlove with this guy, at first i thought it was a crush, but i do love him.... but at the same time i'm trying to hook him up with one of my friends, i know i'm stupid, but seriously, we would never work out, How do i get over him? Well the first hook-up didn't work, but then a few months later he met this second girl, my best friend, he asked me to find out if she was interested, she was.... They ended up together and i ended up Heart-Broken. FAST FORWARD 5 MONTHS!!!My friend and the guy i was still n love with were having problems, leaving me playing Mail Man, some how in all this unessisary Drama, i find out he knew i loved him all along, and for a while he's secretly loved me back, heres where the problem comes in, He broke up with my best friend ((not for me, they were having problems before that... like her taking off her shirt in public, just to show she could have any man she wants)) and she immedialtly assumed that it was my fault because she knew i was hopelessly inlove with him, she stopped talking to me and broke up with him. its been 4 months, she's showing no signs of talking to me or him, for about a week we've been friends with benifits, i have a feeling he's gonna ask me out.... ... time for the killer question What do i say?
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Posted: Wed Jun 11, 2008 8:16 pm
First of all your friend should not have blamed you for losing the guy if she was like that. As for going out with this guy, what do you want? If you want to go out with him and want to be more than just "friends with benefits", let him know what you want out of the relationship and just be honest with him.
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Posted: Wed Jun 11, 2008 8:58 pm
  Well, do you still love him?
And it's truly not your fault... she just needed someone to blame, we all get that sometimes. When you don't understand, it's easier to blame someone else. Look at the Holocaust. Look at the different wars we had over the centuries. Is it anyone's fault? Not really, everyone plays a little part, but no one is completely at fault.
So, don't be so hard on yourself, sweetheart. Do what your heart tells you. If you are still interested in him and he to you, try it out, but let him know exactly what you expect (since you guys were friends with benefits and all that). A relationship is a give and take. Both people have to work towards it.
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Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 4:16 am
bah. first of all its not your fault obviously, so maybe talk to your firend about it and work it out. maybe find her a new boyfriend and she wouldnt care if you went out with her ex. Also dont do friends with benifits. k. its just ....not right. He will get what he wants without making a commitment...and if he loved you he would want to be your boyfriend. But if he is getting it already then he doesnt need to be.
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Posted: Thu Jun 12, 2008 7:27 pm
YES! YOU SAY YES! now here iz the big word BUT if he waz only goin out wit your friend 2 make you jealous then no. WHY? cuz he hurt you once and you shouldn't let him hurt you again. now az 4 ur SO CALLED friend, she seemz alittle slutty dont ya think. now that iz no friend. she new you liked him and although she liked him 2 she should have atleast have talked 2 you about it. but you guyz should try and work it out. and the friendz with benefitz thingz iz a NO NO. itz either ur friendz or ur a couple but definetly not both.
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Posted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 6:10 am
YES!!
I think you deserve him..
Anyway you give up a lot already..
For your best friend part..
Hmmm..
How bout this..
Let her be..
You know..
She's not the only person in the world but i know it's hard to forget her since she's ur best friend..
And it would be much harder if you have been friends for a long time..
Just hope that she'll realize one day that it's not your fault..
And ur not the reason she broke up with him..
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Posted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 12:36 pm
Well ur friend thinks its ur fault this is what happened to me before with my friends if u have more friends tell them what happened and try to conduct a plan to convince her that it wasnt ur fault.
And if that works u have the friendship thing fixed now 4 the guy
I would say "but what happened to [insert bestfriends name here] ya know try hard to get but if he starts to give up on u go soft and talk to him for a while get to know him let him talk mostly and if he says he want u to tell about urself give a short but detailed story then if he says he really likes u and he says "will u go out with me" then say yes
i know this is long but trust me it will work if not pm me
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 9:27 pm
first off, its not ur fault that he broke up with ur friend. second, if she blames u, i wouldnt rly consider her a friend, considering:
1. she knew u liked him all along and didnt care and still went out with him not rly caring whether u liked it or not
2. u were nice the whole time even playing messenger 4 them, so if she has any1 to blame its herself, and honestly if she blames u, she doesnt rly sound worth it as a friend
now about ur question, what should u say, i cant tell u exactly what 2 say, mainly, just be urself. if he asks u out, then say yes, but dont sound over eager.... the main thing tho, BE URSELF
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Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 3:55 pm
I think you should say yes if you really like the guy... and 'friends with benefits' NO thats bad! Anyway, if your friend blames you, then she is just irresponsible. You should never blame others irrationally. She sounds kind of slutty. Sorry if that offends you, but she took her shirt of in public. You should try to talk with her, and if she just ignores you and continues to be a b*tch, then shes not worth it. You sound like a really nice person, so if she is willing to let someone like that go, then it is her lose. If you are to nice then people will only take advantage of you! If she wants to act like a child then apparently she has not grown up, and needs to be treated like a child.
So, for the guy. Say yes if you love him, and no if you don't
For the girl. Try to smooth it out, but be mature about it.
Good luck!
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Posted: Sun Jun 15, 2008 9:25 pm
ok if youve gone through the trouble to remember all this then i say if he asks you out say YES!!! you dont if you say no and you still like him then hell go on to other girls and once again your there heartbroken
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Posted: Tue Jul 08, 2008 5:02 pm
there's two ways (u dont need to pick either, its ur choice anyway)
1. Say yes cuz its the guy of ur dreams no matter what others tell you.
2. If he's kinda like a jerk in the long run just say no, cuz it'll make u hope for nothing.
But if i were u i'd pick the first one! XD
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Posted: Wed Jul 09, 2008 6:23 am
You tell him you would love too, if you lose friends over a guy, (especially like that) then I don't think you've had that strong of a connection.
My friend got a boyfriend who was really not nice to me and I told her, "He's a jerk you could do better" and she hid it from her parents and she would ask me what I thought of him and I would say that. Then she had a fight with her parents and she was just ranting and I was agreeing with everything she said. "You might just be happier if your mom left your dad...." Blah blah blah, "Your dad was always a little weird" <<< she said it before I agreed to it. Turns out she's been holding everything I said against me because I was trying to make her feel better. And another friend and I where joking around about having met some boys on MSN, you could tell from the story that was not real, we are really bad liars, anyway, my friend asked her if she was jealous of me because I had a phone number on my arm. And she said.
"Why should I be jealous of her? She hasn't had a boyfriend all year and she can't attract anyone to her."
^^ Almost exact words.
The point? Even thought I thought we were best friend it seems that guys were more important to her then I was, she was willing to give my friendship up so she could have a guilt free realtionship with a guy 5 years older who's going to join the military and just got kicked out of his house who is now living with his boss. He also has no money to get anywhere...
She chose a loser boyfriend over a friend who would have been there for her. That's what your friend did, she chose bros over hoes. -lol-
Sorry for the ranting, I just thought I would share. biggrin
Then when she starts complaining about it, ignore her.
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Posted: Fri Jul 11, 2008 10:19 am
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Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:52 pm
Id say go with it ive been in the same situation. Ask the girl and its been since may 15 ive been with her if it mean losing 1 person and gaining someone you love its worth it id say. And if they hate you why? Its not your fault and its his/hers if she hates him thats her bizzness and you should not be in the lot.
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Posted: Fri Jul 18, 2008 10:57 pm
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