His brother >=(

[Testicular Diabeetus]

Uhg. Ok so I do not get along with my fiances brother.
He is always making me feel stupid and pointing out my flaws, and me with my temper I usually start smarting off to him which just adds fuel to the fire.
I know that I should just keep my mouth shut but he is just so irritaitng.
And I just found out that he is saying really mean things behind my back. =(
He has been calling me the "b word" and the "c word" mostly.
=(

I want to get along with him and possibly be friends whith him again, we used to get along in high school.
I don't know what happened, but he is just so mean to me.

Oh and to make it worse he acts, he will hug me and stuff.
But it is all FAKE.

What do I do guys I really need help on this one.

 

[faithful quenga]

I am a sinner... "1 John 1:8"

I want to say that I am very sorry that you are facing difficulties with this. I and my sister in-law do NOT get along and she not allowed anywhere near my family, most especially my daughter.

From what you say about being friends in high school, is there a possibility of his actions toward you being his way justifying it to himself why he shouldn't like you? I mean to say, is it possible he had a crush on you in High school and since you are engaged to his brother that could cause him anger and to act out in such a way as to point out your flaws so he can say in his head "oh she's a hot headed angry person, she is beneath me I didn't need that in my life". This is in no way to trash talk you, and I fear I am being confusing. But it's like the school boy who likes the girl but will push her in the dirt because he likes her and doesn't know how to deal with it?

I say pray for him and for yourself to grow closer on a family basis. If you can with as little smarting off as possible try to have an adult conversation asking him what his true problem with you is? Why does he feel the need to point out your flaws as if he is perfect? Try to be open and honest with him and if he does not respond in a like wise manner I would say, just do your best to not speak to him and to not engage in his attacks.

You can love someone as Christ has called us to do and choose to not accept their abuse. I say, if you haven't yet, forgive him for his rudeness and abuse and try to talk to him as little as you can. Don't out right ignore him, but don't go looking for his input on things. If he says things about you that are harsh and rude, Kindly leave the room and do not allow him to continue it. Try your best not to talk back, but pray for him and for yourself when you feel like smarting off. It's okay to be angry with him for his actions, but you don't have to act on them. You cannot control what he says, but you can control what you say.

Do you know the Serenity Prayer? Just in case, I'll give you the short version so that you can repeat it to yourself in your head or out loud when you feel upset and powerless over him:

God
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to changes the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference,
AMEN!

...Saved by God's grace "Acts 15:11"