|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 3:18 am
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 6:42 am
i think, sir chazz, you have every right to be jealous. but maybe you don't need to be. i would be a little upset about the picture comment thing (but i happen to be an insanely jealous person) maybe -i could be wrong- she does find him more attractive than she does you, but that isn't anything to worry about. think of it as a compliment 'i think he's hot, but i'd much rather be with you' you know? perhaps you can accompany her on this road trip? or if that is out of the question..... tell her you love her and maybe get her some flowers. oh and make sure you tell her to be careful and that you will be thinking of her every second.
sorry if this wasn't any help, i am not all too great with advice. sweatdrop
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 7:49 am
Well, you could try the old fashioned way of dealing with things: talking it out with your partner! It's always better to talk about what is bothering you. Sit her down and just have a long discussion of how you feel about this person, what she feels about this person, and what you both feel about each other. I suppose she could always lie, but still, that doesn't seem likely with she isn't the type to play around. Just sit down and talk to her about it and see what happens from that.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 9:20 am
My goodness! If my husband were to ever "fraternize" with a girl like that, he would be slapped up every direction sideways and silly.
But he knows that.
My best advice is spill the beans like you've never spilled them before! This has always worked for both my husband and I when we talk to one another. Everything you just said her? Tell her. Tell her you just can't help but feel jealous, and why. Tell her that you know what she has said about the guy and not to worry, but you just can't help it. Say you know she might be angry at you for bringing it up again, but you need to just to get it off your chest and that you need her to accept it. Go as deep as you can to make it all better.
That's my advice. But I'm always telling people to communicate. Usually it is the best policy in a relationship. Total openness. Even when it seems silly or foolish. If they love you, they'll understand, or they'll open their heart up enough to accept it.
Good luck! biggrin heart
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 10:59 am
Chazzzzz zentlair My goodness! If my husband were to ever "fraternize" with a girl like that, he would be slapped up every direction sideways and silly. But he knows that. My best advice is spill the beans like you've never spilled them before! This has always worked for both my husband and I when we talk to one another. Everything you just said her? Tell her. Tell her you just can't help but feel jealous, and why. Tell her that you know what she has said about the guy and not to worry, but you just can't help it. Say you know she might be angry at you for bringing it up again, but you need to just to get it off your chest and that you need her to accept it. Go as deep as you can to make it all better. That's my advice. But I'm always telling people to communicate. Usually it is the best policy in a relationship. Total openness. Even when it seems silly or foolish. If they love you, they'll understand, or they'll open their heart up enough to accept it. Good luck! biggrin heart For some reason I don't see sitting her down and telling her I'm jealous is going to work as well.
She's a fairly mature girl, but she's still a girl (that's probably starting her time-of-the-month soon).
I can picture her telling me to get over it, that I'm being paranoid and he's just a really good friend.
And then there's the kicker ... the thing she said last time I brought him up that made me feel bad about accusing anything.
Has she given me any reason not to trust her?
I mean ... I haven't caught her doing anything with any guy that would actually upset me ... and she's done nothing at all that would harm our relationship.
I wonder if I'm being too much of a worry-wart ... if I really am just paranoid.
I love her too much to have this guy interfere. I don't want to lose her. I don't want to be hurt again. I still say go for it. She should understand why you would worry. Just ask her to put herself in your shoes. What if you were going on a roadtrip with a bunch of girls...? She may not like you putting her in that sort of situation, but love is supposed to be about equality. And no, maybe she hasn't given you any reason to worry. But I know I've gotten myself awfully upset at my husband when he won't let me look at what he's doing on the computer screen and I begin to think "what if he is looking at porn??" Of course he's not, I know that, and to even have the thought cross my mind is terrible, but it never stops a person from worrying about it. Humans are naturally looking for a state of turmoil, they expect something to go arwy and wrong, and we need the release of knowing that nothing is actually going to be wrong at all when our love tells us we are being foolish and silly (even if it hurts to have them tell us so).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 6:01 pm
Well, seeing as it looks like it is a ways off, I'd not think about it right now...
but I could be wrong and this could be coming up very soon.
Ok, so this is what I'd do in your situation:
Ask her not to go, and explain every reason why that is (including jealousy, and not knowing this guy yourself). Make sure she understands why you feel the way you do, because you obviously don't want her going, and as Z said ask her to put herself in your place.
If she refuses to listen to you, and decides to go anyways... then I would have to say to leave her. You love her, and it will hurt. Though if she can't go with a simple request like that (full of good, honest reasons), and she still claims to love you, then questions need to be asked what the word "love" means to her. If she will be faithful to you on the trip, then she wont go. If she goes, make sure she knows it is the end.
Or you could see about having a friend of yours tag along on the trip, and report back to you... which will also make you feel terrible... but then you'd know if anything happened.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Khalida Nyoka Vice Captain
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Khalida Nyoka Vice Captain
|
Posted: Wed May 17, 2006 6:03 pm
Another thing!
You could make the counter offer of taking her on a trip as soon as both of you are able to go!
Instead of her going on a trip with him, have her go somewhere with you...
Go to the concerts she likes, and have her do things with you.
This should be just as well as anything else.
If it is a trip she wants, then this would be the right opportunity. If it is fun and music, that works as well.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat May 20, 2006 7:17 am
Yes! You should, you have every right to be. Now, wy don't you tell your girlfriend how you feel? I'm sure she'd understand.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon May 29, 2006 8:05 pm
It doesn't seem like she means it to be anything more than just friendship. It's not like she asked to go on a roadtrip alone with him or something. Even so, I can understand why your jealous, and I comend you for not just asking her not to be friends with him anymore.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jun 02, 2006 3:09 pm
well being jelouse kind of proves that you care for her alot
and well
if you don't like the idea that much why wont you just go with them?
i didn't read any part that says that you're unable to do so
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Jun 03, 2006 7:17 pm
You do have a right to be jealous. Just not... overly jealous. Being a bit jealous is actually really sweet. It shows how much you care. Being overly jealous is basically being a control freak.. Spazz down. ~Shrugs~ Tell her what you feel about the road trip idea. Tell her she can do what she wants, you'd just strongly prefer she didn't go.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
