Christmas Chaos

[Kitsuna Ri]

I started writing this with the intent of it being a Akuroku christmas fic. Mainly because I wanted to enter the Christmas contest at the Akuroku club on DA. However the rules are fairly...challenging. Basically we have to have our piece represent a Christmas carol. But it can't just be a song fic or just have the lyrics randomly there.

This...kinda made it difficult. Cuz it certainly would have been a helluva lot easier to just write a song fic or have the carol randomly play on the radio or have someone sing it. So, I went to go inquire help from my beta reader. She gave me a really great opening (though I tweaked it a bit) and so I went with the flow. Unfortunatly, it has become very cracky. And I'm about four pages into it (according to my Word program) and I'm just now getting to a little bit of Akuroku. This has mainly become a torment the hell out of Xemnas fic Oo;; I'm hoping though I can maybe figure out how this will 'represent' a carol (anyone know any X-mas carols that sing of chaos? ^^; ) and will hopefully focus back on Akurokuness. Anyway enough rambling. You probably want to read the story now. Or I hope you do. So ratings and what not first.

Rating: R for language and yaoi and there will probably be disturbing images...just cuz it's cracky.
Disclaimer: Not mine, neither are the carols.
Pairing: There are soooo many yaoi pairings in here. Hehe enjoy them :3
Warnings: Slash, language, randomness, crack.

The observational report entry #173 of VI: There has been a ban placed on Christmas and the singing of any and all Christmas carols in the castle. I can assure you that I am not to blame for it though. The last time I attempted singing I ended up with an 'X' shaped scar on my face; and people wonder why I hate Xigbar... But, I digress, it all started when Axel came back from Halloween Town, having visited the more wintry side of the world…

The members of the organization were gathered in the usual meeting room, discussing whatever new plan Xemnas had come up with. Xemnas was in the midst of speaking when Axel stumbled out of a dark portal, snow falling off of his hair and shoulders and a goofy grin adorning his face. “Merry Christmas everyone!” The room was silent as everyone just stared at him. What the hell was he going on about now?

Xemnas raised a brow, irritation written clearly on his face. “So nice of you to finally join us number VIII. I’m sure you’ll be giving me a written report fairly-”Axel waved his hands frantically, cutting Xemnas off. “Wait wait! You all didn’t understand what I was saying!” An amused snort came from Xigbar, “Since when do we ever understand anything you say?” Axel shot him a glare, which was brushed off, and then held up a bag he had been carrying. “I learned about something really interesting while I was at that winter place!” This time it was Xemnas’ turn to be amused. “You actually learned something? Do enlighten us with your vast knowledge then…” Axel gave a slight twitched and huffed. “You know what? Fine. I won’t let any of you have presents then!” Demyx’s head shot up. “Presents? You brought us something back then?” Axel threw the sack over his shoulder. “I had but since none of you seem inclined to listen to me…” Xaldin gave an irritated sigh. “Oh just tell us what the ******** it is you have to say and get it over with.” Demyx nodded. “Yeah! And hand out the gifts!”
Axel smirked and wagged his finger. “Nu-uh. You don’t get the presents until tomorrow night on Christmas eve!”

Xemnas rubbed his temples, feeling a migraine coming on, just like it always did whenever Axel acted like this. “What exactly is this ‘Christmas’ number VIII?” Axel’s eyes seemed to shine at this question, which made a few of the members twitch. “Ahh see that’s the fun part! It’s a holiday that is celebrated every year in December! You give gifts, eat lots of food, kiss under some plant and you sing!”

Larxene stood up, and started toward the door. “The thought of celebrating something that will involve Axel singing and trying to kiss us is enough reason for us not to listen anymore. But I’ll let you all enjoy this nonsense.” With that, she left the room and Xemnas watched her enviously. Sure he could just as easily leave, but he knew eventually he’d have to hear all of this anyway. And from past experiences, it was always better to listen to number VIII’s rants the first time then try and escape and be forced to listen a second time. Axel shrugged, unfazed by Larxene’s blatant disinterest, and continued with his story and explanation of Christmas. Demyx seemed to be the only one who was truly interested, or at least the only one to show interest, and continued to question Axel about presents and all the musical aspects of this ‘Christmas’ thing. Xemnas had a very, very bad feeling about this. Yet, unfortunately, he knew there wasn’t a damn thing he could do to stop it.

It was about an hour after the whole meeting incident. Things were quiet. Way too quiet. A feeling of foreboding overcame Xemnas as he realized just how quiet it was. He stood up from his desk and went to the door, his hand twitching above the knob. He knew that he would probably regret opening the door. Because he would see something that he wouldn’t like. And not only would he not like it, it would make him twitch horribly. Just like the last time, when he opened his door and found Demyx and Axel running down the halls, streaking. Yet, his hand rested on the door knob and turned it. He could only pray that Demyx and Axel would be fully clothed.

As the door was pulled open, the site that greeted Xemnas was not of naked org members (Thank Kingdom Hearts for that!), but of an explosion of red and green. Xemnas honestly couldn’t think of a way to react. Axel ran by, holding a bundle of some weird plant, and looked over at Xemnas, grinning. He wore an odd, white and red hat that clashed horribly with his hair and seemed to have a bell around his neck. The urge to just turn back around and pretend nothing was going on came over Xemnas.

“Xemnas! Good timing! Like the decorating Demyx and I have done?” Xemnas looked around, “Not particularly,” he muttered. But Axel of course just ignored him, continuing to ramble. “We haven’t gotten the tree set up yet, but that’s because Xigbar and Xaldin are arguing about how to take it down. Xigbar wants to shoot it of course and Xaldin has his spears ready to chop it down, which is what they should do. But you know how Xigbar always...” Xemnas brought his fingers up to his temples again, wishing there was a way to drown out Axel’s voice and incessant rambling. Why me? He thought to himself. To add to his misery, Demyx came bounding over (And he was jingling! What the hell?), some weird pointy stick like objects resting on his head and wore a collar of bells (Ah so that’s where the annoying mass of jingling came from…) “Xemnas! You wanna hear the really cool carol things Axel taught me?”

Xemnas narrowed his eyes and replied quickly, “No.” A crestfallen look crossed Demyx and he lowered his head pathetically, “Oh, ok.” Xemnas stared at number VIV, the weird things on his head (What the hell are those things?) making him look all the more pathetically wounded. Xemnas gritted his teeth, “Fine. But only one song. Got that? One. ONE.” Demyx’s head shot up, the bells around his neck jingling merrily, and he grinned. “Really? Great! Lemme just go get my sitar and the music sheets.” Xemnas twitch. “Music sheet! One song damnit!” The blonde just continued to run off, each jingle of the bells causing Xemnas internal pain. Axel chuckled and Xemnas looked at him warily. He eyed the plants in Axel’s arms and raised a brow. “What is that?” A sly smirk crossed Axel’s face, “A way for me to get Roxas to finally give in to my kisses!” Xemnas groaned, not really wanting to know how some plants were going to do that. Were they some type of drug?

Note to self: Do not accept any food or drink from Axel.

Axel seemed to hug the plants in his arm as though they were some kind of prize. Xemnas took a step away from him. Poor number XIII, if only he knew what was to be his fate…

Demyx finally ran back over with his sitar and a handful of paper. He shuffled through them, obviously searching for one to sing. “Hey, Demyx, why don’t you sing that one about Santa and the rooftop?” Xemnas glanced at Axel, and saw that he was smirking deviously. Not a good sign. Demyx looked up and then grinned. “Ok!” He set a sheet down and held his sitar up to play. That sense of foreboding came back and Xemnas was regretting ever agreeing to listen.

Music soon filled the air and Demyx’s voice followed after.

Up on the housetop reindeer pause
Out jumps good old Santa Claus
Down through the chimney with lots of toys
All for the little ones, Christmas joys
Ho, ho ho! Who wouldn't go? Ho, ho ho! Who wouldn't go?

Now, normally, Xemnas enjoyed Demyx’s playing. Not that he would ever admit that of course. But this time...this time Xemnas would love nothing more than to shove that sitar somewhere would Demyx could never play it or sing again.

Up on the housetop, click, click, click
Down through the chimney with old Saint Nick

Xemnas twitched, almost violently actually. This song it was so damn…merry! And cheerful! The melody, the lyrics, so disturbing! It made him want to take one of Xaldin’s spears and shove it through his head to make it stop. It was that bad. How could someone come up with something like this? If the writer of this song was still alive Xemnas knew that he would need to send Xigbar on a side mission…

First comes the stocking of little Nell
Oh, dear Santa fill it well

Twitch.

Give her a dolly that laughs and cries
One that will open and shut her eyes

Twitch.

Ho, ho, ho! Who wouldn't go? Ho, ho-

Snap.


“STOP! I DEMAND YOU STOP SINGING NOW!” Xemnas would rather give up Kingdom Hearts than listen to this horror any longer. His body shook and his lasers had been summoned. It was taking all his self control to not destroy Demyx and his sitar. Demyx looked at him in fear and stepped back, hugging his sitar close. “B-But you said-” Xemnas raised one laser, his eyes narrowing dangerously. “Forget what I said! I should relieve you of your vocal chords for singing that monstrosity!”

Axel was covering his mouth, trying so very hard to not laugh. But it was obvious he couldn’t help it. He laughed loudly and Xemnas sent a darker glare towards him. “You…this is all your fault!” Axel’s laughter stopped and his eyes widened with fear. He knew there was only one thing to do.

Run. Run as fast as possible.

And he did just that. He quickly turned and darted down the hall, the bell around his neck jingling wildly and the plants he had been holding flew from his arms. He rounded a corner and slammed into Roxas, sending them both to the ground.

“Damnit Axel, watch where you are going!” The blonde groaned and rubbed his head. Confusion crossed his face as he felt something odd on the top of his head. He picked it off and held it in front of his face. It was some weird green plant. “What the hell is this?” Axel looked up and his face brightened, all fear and worry of Xemnas wanting to do awful things to him disappeared. “That, my dear Roxy, is mistletoe!” Roxas glared at Axel irritably due to the use of that annoying nickname. “And what the hell is it for?” Axel gave a huge grin and Roxas immediately regretted his question. “Allow me to show you…”

Axel moved forward, taking the mistletoe and holding it up above them, while Roxas moved back. He did not like that grin on Axel’s face and he most certainly did not like the fact that the red head kept moving closer. Really. He didn’t. A blush crossed his face, but he tried to keep his voice steady as he spoke. “Axel, what the hell are you-” Roxas was rudely interrupted by Axel’s lips on his. He froze in surprise, unable to bring his hands up to push the pervert away. The kiss was unfortunately brief. No! It wasn’t unfortunate! It was fortunate! Roxas thought to himself. Axel pulled away, grin back on his face. “Pretty great, ne? Anytime you and another person are caught under the mistletoe together you have to kiss! I’m going to put it up all around the place!” Roxas stared at him in horror. “N-No…” Axel just grinned as he stood and Roxas could only watch the evil red head walk away, arms filled with an evil plant, his mind forming an evil plan. He shivered. Somehow he’d have to find a way to stay in his room during this whole Christmas celebration.

Axel moved through the halls of the castle, hanging mistletoe in random places, with a smile on his face. He had finally gotten to kiss Roxas! And he hadn’t been pushed away! Granted, it wasn’t as long or as breath taking has he had wanted it to be, but still! Beggars can’t be choosers! And he was happy just getting to make contact with the blonde boy’s lips!

Roxas on the other hand was not anywhere near as merry as Axel was. He had gone back to his room, brushed his teeth (a lot) and then laid onto his bed. He knew that Axel was always trying to hit on him and saying weird things. But Roxas always blew him off or ignore him because he knew that whatever Axel was ‘feeling’ was false. They had no hearts. They couldn’t feel. That was that. So why couldn’t he push Axel away when they finally kissed?

Because, I was just completely caught off guard, that’s why. That’s all. I didn’t enjoy the fact that it was actually ni-NO! Stop it. This is stupid, and if I’m not careful he’s going to end up doing it again!

He sighed and closed his eyes. They may not be normal beings, but couldn’t this place be a little less crazy? He sighed tiredly and rolled onto his side. He heard a soft melody playing next door. Seems like Demyx has stopped causing chaos with Axel. Xemnas probably made him, Roxas thought to himself. He shifted slightly and listened as Demyx’s voice joined the melody of his sitar.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, You gave it away
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special


Roxas frowned slightly. Wasn’t this whole Christmas celebration thing supposed to be filled with happiness? From the tone of this song it sounded so sad and melancholy, nothing like what Axel had excitedly rattled on about.

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
Tell me baby do you recognize me?
Well it's been a year, it doesn't surprise me

(Happy Christmas!) I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I Love You" I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now I know you'd fool me again

Roxas snorted. Love, pain, betrayal. Is that what one had to go through with a heart? Although love…it’s supposed to be a really wonderful feeling, right? If I had a heart, would I respond to Axel? He rolled back onto his back, arms behind his head and opened his eyes to stare at the ceiling. He responded to Axel. He knew he did, but he would deny it. Because it just wouldn’t make sense. No heart means no feelings. He couldn’t explain why he blushed at the things Axel said to him or why his stomach would feel light and…fluttery when they would brush against each other. And that drove him insane! He grabbed his head and sighed in irritation. He was going to blame all these confusing thoughts on that stupid song Demyx was singing…

A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
(Gave you my heart)

“Sounds like Axel…gah!” He brought his pillow over his head, wanting to drown out the lyrics of this song. Damn Axel for telling them about this holiday and teaching Demyx all those stupid songs.
 

[Kitsuna Ri]

Christmas Chaos
Chapter 2: Mistletoe and Planning

The observational report entry #173 (part 2) of VI: The entire place soon became decorated. Not all of us were very pleased with what eight and nine were doing, though I must admit the trouble the mistletoe caused brought on much amusement. Except when I was caught under it with Xaldin. That was a most disturbing experience. But still, everyone did have interesting experiences with the various decorations.

By late afternoon, the hallways were free of Axel and Demyx, but they had most certainly left their mark. Streamers, ribbons and mistletoe in hidden places adorned the walls and ceiling. Xigbar was most irritated with all the decorations hanging from the ceiling; he kept running into them.

“Man! I can’t believe they keep putting those things in my way!”

Xaldin sighed looking up and watching as Xigbar became tangled in some streamers. He repressed a snicker.

“You could try actually walking on the ground like the rest of us.”

“As if!”

Xaldin rolled his eyes and watched as Xigbar then ran into some bows and bells. He snorted in amusement as the other cursed and fought his way through them.

“Dumbass.”

Marluxia, meanwhile, was most intrigued by all the mistletoe that he found when wandering about the hallways. He poked around at the strange, green plant in wonder, trying to figure out what kind of plant it was exactly and didn’t notice Axel and Demyx pushing Vexen towards him. The blonde scientist ran into Marluxia and growled irritably at the two who had pushed him. Axel and Demyx smirked wickedly while Marluxia blinked in slight confusion. Was he missing something?

“Um, what’s going on?”

“You two are under the mistletoe!”

“The what?”

“The green plant!”

Marluxia looked up at the plant, examining it again.

“Is that what it’s called? How interesting…”

Vexen sighed and rubbed his temples, he didn’t want to ask, but he knew he needed to find out what the hell these two were up.

“So what exactly does that mean, eight and nine?”

Their smirks turned into big grins and suddenly, Vexen felt very, very afraid. He now regretted every coming out of his lab.

“It means…”

“That you two…”

“Have to…”

“Kiss!”

The two laughed while Vexen twitched, his face stricken with horror. Marluxia continued to gaze at the plant, now finding it even more intriguing.

“Amazing, so this plant has the power to make the two people who stand under it, kiss?”

Axel paused in his laughter and shrugged.

“Uhh yeah, sure, we’ll go with that. So anyway, since you’re both under it, kiss!”

Vexen shook his head and began to walk away quickly.

“There is no way I’m going to participate in such an activity. I should have left earlier like number twelve did.”

Axel smirked and tsked. Looks like he’d have to resort to their back up plan after all. He turned to Demyx and nodded.

“Demxy, the song?”

“It’s ready!”

“Do share it then.”

Demyx grinned, quickly tuning his sitar and began to play a very light and cheery melody.

Vexen the snowman
Was a really chilly guy!
He had no heart but he sure was smart
And he makes pickles all day!!!
Ohhhh Vexen the snowman!
He's giving me an evil look!
And I just can't stop, because this song rocks
And I'll add he's Marluxia's b***h!

Vexen slowly turned around, staring at the two. He twitched, and walked over towards them. Axel was covering his mouth, trying not to burst out with laughter. Demyx grinned and looked up at Vexen who had various expressions going across his face. First there was anger, then shock, followed by disgust and then of course horror. His hands clenched into fist and then unclenched. Marluxia was giggling madly and clapping.

“Oh bravo you two! Very creative, it’s so very fitting for Vexen!”

Vexen turned and glared darkly at Marluxia, deciding that anger was the best reaction to that humiliation, but then looked back sharply at Demyx. The kid must die.

“Run.”

Demyx pouted, a bit afraid of the look Vexen was giving him, but more concerned with the reaction at his song. He thought it had been good…

“You didn’t like it? I thought it was catchy and then Axel had-”

There was an unsettling chill that filled the room, Demyx shivered and looked down to Vexen’s hands. He squeaked lightly in fear and turned, quickly heading for the end of the hall.

“Axel! You said he wouldn’t do this!”

“Well…I assumed wrong obviously!”

The two raced out of the room, but still ended up with some icicles on their back and hair. Vexen stood there, twitching irritably and then stiffened up when he felt Marluxia wrap his arms around him.

“What are you doing eleven?”

“You know four, I’m hurt that you were really so against kissing me! It won’t be something you’ll regret you know.”

Marluxia gave a somewhat seductive smirk and Vexen turned his head to face him, eyes narrowed.

“Eleven, there is no way that I will be-”

Before he could finish speaking, Marluxia leaned in and captured Vexen’s lips. The blonde’s eyes widened in surprise and didn’t register that Marluxia had moved him so that he was facing him now. He attempted to push eleven away, but Marluxia just smirked slightly and pulled him closer, pressing their bodies together and deepening the kiss. Vexen soon felt himself relaxing and his eyes slowly closed. Before he knew it, he was kissing Marluxia back.

At the end of the hall, Axel and Demyx peered from around the corner. They smirked triumphantly as they saw the two kissing and quietly tiptoed away. When they were far enough they started laughing.

“I can’t believe it!”

“What? That they’re actually kissing? And looking as though they enjoy it?”

“That one of your plans actually worked! I mean we got Marluxia and Vexen and Xaldin and Saix all to kiss under that stuff! It really worked!”

Axel frowned and whapped Demyx lightly on the head.

“Yee of little faith. My plans always work.”

“Then how come you can’t get Roxas?”

“Ouch, that’s low man, really low.”

Demyx bit his lip and gave Axel a look of apology.

“Sorry, but I was just making a point…”

Axel sighed and looked down. Demyx did have a point, but little did the nocturne know that he had been able to kiss Roxas the night before. He smirked slightly at the thought. It wouldn’t be long before he did have the blonde to himself. He would just have to finish readying everything.

“C’mon Dem, we still have things to do! Xaldin and Xigbar finally got the tree, right?”

Demyx nodded, “Yeah. Though, I think they decided that stealing it from Christmas Town was easier than determining how to cut it down.”

Axel rolled his eyes but then shrugged.

“Ok, well we need to decorate it so that everything will be complete.”

“Then do we have the party?”

Axel nodded, smirking slightly. The party would be the best part of all of this. Assuming he could get Roxas to finally give up playing hard to get and if they could get Xemnas drunk. It would be something they’d all never forget. Well, unless they became completely shitfaced.

Xemnas shivered as he started to get another bad feeling. He twitched, knowing who was causing this feeling.

Axel and Demyx.

He calmly got up and walked to the door of his office and locked it, knowing that this would be the only safe spot in the castle. But, as soon as this whole ordeal was over, Axel and Demyx would be dealt with severely. And nine would more than likely lose his sitar. Never again did Xemnas want to hear a Christmas song or deal with this foolish holiday.  

[Kitsuna Ri]

Christmas Chaos
Chapter 3: Party Chaos

The observational report entry #173 (part 3) of VI: The tree I will admit was, nice and very captivating what with its bright lights and…shiney decorations. Plus, while they were decorating, it kept them busy for a good three hours, giving most of us a nice time of peace. Xemnas hadn’t been seen since the first singing incident. I think he stayed locked up in his office, though eventually, Demyx and Axel got him to come out for the party. Ahh yes…the party. What an interesting experience that had been. Though I’m surprised I can even remember it all. Of course, there are some things I wish I could forget…

Three hours passed before Axel and Demyx completed the tree. They had ‘borrowed’ all decorations and lights from Christmas Town, though the elves had put up one hell of a fight, and it looked beautiful. Demyx was sniffing an odd looking liquid that Axel had brought back with him after getting the decorations. It was an odd off white color and he couldn’t tell if it was milk that had gone bad or something else.

“Axel, what exactly is this stuff?”

The red head glanced over at him and shrugged.

“I dunno, but I saw a few people pouring bourbon in the stuff so I figured that if it’s meant to be alcoholic there’s no way it can be bad!”

Demyx furrowed his brows and sniffed at the stuff again.

“Are you sure? Because it smells weird and,”

He sipped a bit and made a face of disgust.

“It tastes awful.”

Axel sighed and took the bottle from him, setting it on the table next to the bourbon.

“It’ll taste much better once we mix those two together, ok? Now, let us go fetch everyone!”

Demyx nodded and the two split up, running through the place to gather everyone. At first, they both received no’s in response to their invitation to the party, but with the mention of free alcohol, just about everyone said yes immediately. Except for Luxord. He felt the need to taunt and tease Demyx before giving him an answer.

The musician pouted each time Luxord shook his head and said no. He had been trying to convince him for ten minutes now when it only took five for the others.

“But there will be drinking and, and singing and it’s gonna be fun!”

“Mmm nope, sorry. Still don’t think I’m convinced.”

Demyx sighed, “Come on Luxord! We’ll even play card games! And if you’re worried about the mistletoe I’ll tell you were it’s all hidden so you can avoid it!”

Luxord smirked and leaned down towards Demyx, their noses touching.

“What if I want to be caught under it with you?”

Demyx stared at him, a light blush on his face.

“H-Huh? W-Well um…”

Luxord closed the gap between them and gave Demyx a quick kiss.

“I think I’ll go now.”

Demyx was a bit dazed and nodded slightly.

“Kay…”

He walked down the hall, still out of it, and ran into Axel who was standing outside Roxas’ room, debating about knocking or not. He looked over at the dazed Demyx who had run into him and blinked.

“What’s wrong with you?”

“Nothin’…”

Axel raised a brow but decided to just drop it. Demyx stared at the door for a moment and then looked back at Axel.
“Did he slam the door in your face?”

“No.”

“You haven’t even asked him yet have you?”

“…..No.”

Demyx sighed and knocked on the door, then hurried down the hall, not giving Axel a chance to do the same before Roxas answered. Axel sent a glare down the hall, even though Demyx was long gone, before looking at Roxas.

“A-Ah hey Roxas!”

Axel’s hands fidgeted nervously as Roxas just stared at him.

“What do you want Axel?”

“Well we’re having a Christmas party in the main corridor and I wanted to come let you know so you would um come and join in!”

“I think I’ll pass.”

“There will be spiked eggnog!”

“I don’t drink.”

“There’ll be music.”

“I’ll pass.”

Axel bit his lip, he had to think of something, anything to get Roxas to come to the party! After all he put mistletoe everywhere just so he would get a chance to kiss the boy again!

“We have a Christmas tree all lit up and decorated!”

Roxas hesitated, something about the thought of a Christmas tree and being with everyone just seemed right. It had to be one of Sora’s memories but even so, it intrigued Roxas. He looked up at Axel who seemed to look desperate in trying to convince him. He sighed and looked away.

“I guess I’ll go for a little bit.”

Axel’s face brightened.

“Great! You won’t regret it!”

Roxas just nodded and went back into his room. Axel grinned and started down the hall. Now he wouldn’t have to kill Demyx.

“Awww it worked out after all!”

Demyx stood there grinning and Axel nodded, his grin getting bigger.

“Yup. Now we only have one person left.”

“I don’t think we’ll get Xemnas to go…”

“Well we have to. I want to see him loosen up and get shitfaced.”

Demyx laughed lightly.

“Well that will be interesting, guess we’ll give it a try.”

The two ventured down to Xemnas’ office, determined to get the superior to the party. They knocked on the door, not expecting an immediate answer of course, and then tried the door knob. They weren’t surprised to find it locked, in fact it was another thing they expected.

“So should we just transport in there or do you think he’ll be expecting that and have some sort of trap?”

Axel shrugged, “He probably has a trap, so we have to lure him out.”

“How?”

“Christmas carols of course, duh.”

“But what if he finds a way to block out the sound?”

“He won’t. The annoyance will be too high and he’ll think only about destroying your sitar.”

Demyx hugged his sitar and took a step back, frowning.

“No! I don’t want him to destroy it!”

“Don’t worry, don’t worry, he won’t. We’ll grab him and drag him to the party before he can do that.”

Demyx still looked worried but took a hesitant step forward.

“Alright, if you’re sure Axel. So what song should I play?”

Axel tapped his chin in thought, going through various Christmas carols in his head. Which one would be most annoying to Xemnas? Shame they hadn’t rewritten one like they did for Vexen, but then they might have actually gotten seriously injured.

“Hmm…oh! I know which one will be perfect! Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer!”

Demyx tilted his head.

“Why that?”

“Well first off it’s about a cute animal, which would make Xemnas cringe, and the echoes in the song can be pretty damn annoying.”

“I guess so…”

Xemnas sat at his desk, waiting for the two who had knocked to break the door or to randomly appear in the room. He would be ready for them. Yet so far they hadn’t done either. They were planning something else, they had to be. It was too quiet. He carefully stood up and crept to the door, just to see if he could hear what they were planning.

Demyx fixed his sitar, tuning it quickly and picked out a few chords to pick the right tune. He looked up to Axel and nodded, showing he was ready. Axel grinned,

“Remember, play it loud.”

“Right!”

His fingers strummed over the chords as he played the opening melody for the song. Xemnas heard the music and looked in horror. They weren’t going to sing again. No they couldn’t! He forbade them from doing so!

Demyx’s voice followed the tune and he sang the song, Axel providing the echoes.

Rudolph the red nosed reindeer! (Reindeer)
Had a very shiney nose!
And if you ever saw him,(Saw him)
You would even say it glows! (Like a light bulb!)

Xemnas twitched and clenched his fist. Those bastards! They were going to make his to torment him with this crap!


All of the other reindeer (reindeer)
Used to laugh and call him names (like Pinocchio)
They never let poor Rudolph (Rudolph)
Join in any Reindeer games (like monopoly!)
Then one foggy Christmas Eve
Santa came to say (ho ho ho!)

What the hell was this crap?! It was awful! And so damn cheery! Why the hell would a reindeer have a red nose? And why would they play games? What the ******** was this madness?

Rudolph with your nose so bright
Won’t you guide my sleigh tonight?
Then all the reindeer loved him
As they shouted out with glee (Yippee!)
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer (reindeer)
You’ll go down in history (Like Columbus!)

Xemnas threw the door open, a deranged look on his face as he snarled at the two in front of the doorway.

“Youuuu!”

“Hey there Xemmy! Liked our little door to door caroling?”

“Kill you!”

The two just smirked and snatched both of their superior’s arms and dragged him out from his office. He fought them, yelling curses and threats but the two just laughed, ignoring the promises of having their entrails ripped out and burned, and took him to the party.

“Careful if he bites you Dem! I think he might have rabies!”

Axel grinned and they shoved Xemnas through the door and closed it tight after taking a quick look to make sure everyone was there.

“I will make you both pay with so much pain and suffering!”

“Aww, Xemmy, that’s not the holiday spirit! Come on, relax and have a drink!”

Axel held up a glass with the spiked eggnog, grinning. Xemnas stared at him darkly,

“Like I would really accept a drink from the likes of you, Axel.”

Axel chuckled and shoved the glass in his hands anyway.

“Ah loosen up, we’re having a party!”

He smirked and then wandered over to hand out drinks to everyone else. Xemnas stared down at the glass in distaste. He would not drink this. Especially since Axel made it. He raised the glass and sniffed it.

“Hmm…doesn’t seem too bad. Perhaps it’s safe…”

He glanced around at everyone else. Seemed everyone except Roxas was drinking the stuff and so far no one had fallen over dead. He sipped at it and blinked with surprise. It was actually, kinda…good. He drank a bit more.

“Huh, guess this is alright after all.”

He stood back and watched his subordinates act like idiots while he drank.

“It seems four and eleven are becoming closer.”

Marluxia pulled Vexen towards him and kissed him deeply. Xemnas raised his brows in surprise.

“Very…close indeed.”

Another gulp of his drink and he looked elsewhere. “Must be because of that plant stuff,” He had heard about the mistletoe stuff that Demyx and Axel had put up, so he glanced up to make sure there wasn’t any above him. So far he was safe. He would just stand there and make sure that nothing happened to him.

Roxas stood near the large and bright tree, staring at it in wonder. He was captivated by the beauty the tree held, just because it had some lights and decorations. Was this why Sora loved Christmas so much? He barely noticed that Axel slipped his arm around his shoulders.

“Looks good, ne?”

“Surprisingly, yes. You two did a nice job.”

“Aww gee, thanks Roxy!”

Roxas rolled his eyes but didn’t seem as annoyed as he’d usually be. He looked up at Axel and sighed.

“Axel, why did you do all of this?”

The red head looked down at him and blinked,

“Because! When I learned about it I thought it seemed pretty cool and I thought it might be kinda fun for all of us. I mean, look at everyone! Even Xemnas seems relaxed! Though that could be because he’s on his third glass of eggnog, but still. We may not have hearts, but we should still enjoy the life that we’ve been given. Even if it seems pointless to go on at times.”

Roxas stared at him, a bit shocked at Axel. Who knew the rambunctious idiot could actually be kind of deep? He smiled lightly and actually leaned against the tall red head. Axel looked down at Roxas in surprise, but said nothing, just held the boy closer. This hadn’t exactly been according to his plan to win the blonde over, but it worked well enough anyway.

But he was still determined to get a kiss sometime tonight.

Demyx, meanwhile, was happily playing music on his sitar for everyone, not really drinking much of the eggnog. He still found the stuff nasty. Axel had put the reindeer antlers on his head again, but he didn’t mind so much. He was just happy to be playing music for everyone.

“Beautiful music you play, luv.”

He looked up in surprise to see Luxord standing over him, his blue eyes holding a somewhat wicked gleam. A blush crept onto his face as he remembered what had occurred earlier. Luxord smirked and leaned down, grasping Demyx’s chin.

“Don’t forget why I came to this thing.”

Demyx shivered, feeling nervous with Luxord’s lips so close to his own.

“U-Um..r-right.”

He spoke almost breathlessly, which just made Luxord’s smirk grow. The blonde pulled away, giving Demyx’s antlers a little flick and then walked away. Demyx bit his lip and then quickly, but carefully, set his sitar down and followed after the blonde.

He didn’t catch up with him simply because someone collided into him. He looked over to find a very red faced and drunk Xemnas stumbling about.

“E-Er superior?”

“KINGDUM HARTSSS! Gives me sum yer powrrr!”

Demyx stared at him in shock. Xemnas was completely shitfaced. Axel’s plan had actually worked again! Xemnas stared at Demyx, wavering and trying to focus his eyes. When he seemed to comprehend it was Demyx, he actually smiled. The musician took a step back, finding himself frightened of his drunken superior. Xemnas reached out and grasped Demyx’s wrist and held him there.

“Demex! Yous…yous gotta…gotta…play a song!”

“S-Sure sir, whatever you want.”

“m gonna sing!”

His eyes widened and he slowly nodded.

“A-Alright I’ll um go get my sitar then…”

“Hey hey wait!! Gotta..gotsa ta tell ever’one ta listen!”

Oh god Axel was going to love this. He nodded and made sure that Xemnas was able to stay balanced on his own and then hurried over to Axel. He knew Axel would be irritated for ruining the moment he was having with Roxas, but, it was worth it.

“Axel…”

“Go away Dem.”

“No Axel, seriously, you have to-”

“Dem…”

“Xemnasisdrunkandisgonnasing!”

“Dem I-Wait what? Seriously?”

Axel turned around, startling Roxas, and looked at Demyx.

“Did you say what I think you just said?”

Demyx nodded and pointed over to the table Xemnas was leaning against. Axel grinned,

“Oh god this is perfect! Go get your sitar and I’m going to pick out the perfect lyrics for him!”

“He might be too drunk to read…”

“All the more interesting it’ll be.”

Demyx laughed and went over to ready his sitar and helped Xemnas over to the middle of the room. The rest of the organization watched in amusement as their leader was stumbling and spouting off random things. Zexion, Lexaeus, Marluxia and Vexen even managed to pull away from their embraces to watch their leader act like an idiot. Saix was actually laughing.

Axel ran over with a music sheet for Demyx and Xemnas.

“Ok, start the song!”

“I don’t think it’s gonna be much of a song…look, he can barely hold the paper. How many drinks has he had?”

“Enough, heh.”

Xemnas was moving the paper in his hands and then looked up when Demyx started playing.

“Oh oh…I know ‘is one!”

Xemnas began to sing, his words slurred together and his singing horribly off key. Everyone winced and covered their ears. They couldn’t even comprehend what he was singing, but they weren’t going to stop him, even though it sounded awful. The fact that he was starting to dance and really get into it was way too amusing to miss.

It soon got better when Xemnas just started making up his own lyrics. All of which had to do with Kingdom Hearts.

“Ohhh~ Kigudum harrrtsssss!!! I luv you! Oh ohhhhh! Giiiivvveee me powah!”

Axel had tears rolling down his face as he laughed. He knew he was dead if Xemnas ever remembered this or found out about it, but it was totally worth it. Roxas was even laughing with him. All the better!

Xemnas swayed, his arms up as he sang about his beloved kingdom hearts. He was in mid sentence when he finally paused and fell forward. Lucky for him Saix caught him.

“He’s out.”

“Completely?”

“Yes.”

“Think there’s any chance he’ll remember this?”

“Lets hope not.”

Axel nodded and Saix picked Xemnas up. Xemnas seemed to snuggle against Saix like a child and muttered a few things in his drunken sleep. Saix blushed lightly,

“I’ll just um take him to his room.”

And he quickly left the room, Axel snickering.

“I don’t think we’ll be seeing the two of them for the rest of the night.”

“Did Saix actually blush?!”

“Amazing what alcohol can cause, ne?”

“Yeah…”

The other members began to scatter about once again now that their main amusement was gone. A few ended up leaving, mainly Vexen and Marluxia and Zexion and Lexaeus. It wasn’t hard to figure out why. Axel went back to flirting with Roxas, trying to get the other boy to respond like he wanted while Demyx was now finding himself hesitant to go near Luxord. The only other two left were Xaldin and Xigbar who had spent most of the night arguing and bickering. They were still arguing and it was becoming obnoxious. Not to mention it was totally ruining the mood for Axel and his ‘get Roxas to finally want me’ plan.

“Well at least I’m not hairy!”

“I maybe be hairy, but I’m not going grey.”

“Why you sunava!”

“Guys! Guys! Come on now!”

Axel walked over to them, placing his arms around their shoulders.

“This holiday is supposed to be happy and without arguing! So how about a truce?”

The two glared at each other and while they did that, Axel shoved a headband that held mistletoe on Xaldin’s head. He grinned and pushed them both together.

“Now kiss and make out! Err..up!”

They looked at each other in horror, Xigbar twitching slightly.

“As if, dude! There’s no way I’m kissing this ape!”

Xaldin growled and pulled Xigbar close. The other looked at him in surprise and confusion. Xaldin smirked and pressed his lips against Xigbar’s, kissing him roughly. The sharpshooter’s eye widened but he found that he actually was starting to enjoy it.

Axel watched and smirked.

“Damn I’m good.”

“You know, you’re acting more like its Valentines Day since you’re trying to fix everyone up,” Roxas said from behind him.

The red head turned and grinned, “I’m just bringing people together! That’s what this holiday is about, ne?”

Roxas rolled his eyes and walked past him, Axel quickly following. He wasn’t going to let the blonde leave just yet! Not without that kiss!

He grasped Roxas’ wrists and pulled him into his arms.

“Axel what the-”

“Aren’t you having a good time though? I mean, I wanted to make this special for you too you know…”

“W-What?”

Roxas looked up at him and Axel smiled gently.

“I know how much you hate it when I’m always groping you and stuff but I just really want a chance with you is all.”

“But we don’t have…”

“Hearts? I know…but for some reason I don’t think it matters. Can’t you look past it too? I promise I’ll be less annoying if you finally just give in. Plus, I know you’re just playing hard to get.”

He gave a wicked smirk and Roxas blushed glancing downward. Maybe it really didn’t matter that they didn’t have hearts. After all, thanks to Axel and his party (and mainly his well placed mistletoe) a lot of the others had ended up together. He just needed to stop resisting whatever it was he knew he felt for Axel.

“I-I guess…I guess you’re right Axel,” He said softly, looking back up into Axel’s eyes.

Axel smiled. Finally! Not only had Roxas admitted he was right about something (a very nice bonus) but he was finally going to have the boy to himself!

“So this means that I can-”

He was immediately cut of by Roxas throwing his arms around his neck and kissing him abruptly. He blinked, a bit in shock, but held the other and returned the kiss.

Talk about a Christmas miracle.

Demyx smiled as he watched his friend finally get the one thing he wanted most. He was a bit surprised that Axel didn’t actually have to get Roxas drunk, but he knew that the blonde wouldn’t have trusted any kind of drink from Axel, especially at a party. But still, he finally got his wish, though Demyx was still a bit sad. He knew that now Axel would probably only want to be with Roxas, which he understood, but that still made him feel a bit sad and lonely.

He sighed and then jumped when he felt a pair of arms wrap around him. He looked up to see Luxord with a lazy grin on his face. He was obviously a bit drunk, maybe even more than a bit seeing as how his eyes were a bit glassed over.

“Erm, yes, Luxord?”

“Thought you were looking a bit lonely, luv, so decided I’d make my move and take my prize for comin’ here now.”

Demyx for once actually knew what he was talking and smiled. He leaned up to kiss the other gently then pulled away.

“You’ll get more when you’re sober.”

Luxord smirked, “Then sober up I shall, luv.”

After that, the party finally died down as they left the corridor. Surprisingly, things had gone well. Perfect even. And Axel could only hope that Xemnas wouldn’t remember much of the party and would let them celebrate the holiday again. Though, singing Christmas carols would probably be permanently banned. Poor Demyx, he had been having fun with them.

He sighed and held Roxas close to him, intent on enjoying the rest of the night with him. Because, he had a feeling that the next morning wouldn’t be as pleasant.

 

[Kitsuna Ri]

And the final chapter that took me nearly a month after Chirstmas to finish ^^;

Christmas Chaos
Chapter 4: Aftermath

The morning after wasn’t so pleasant for many of them. Basically everyone, save for Demyx and Roxas, had a nasty hangover, Xemnas especially.

Xemnas had woken up and found that he was not in his room. That was the only hint he needed to know that something had happened at that party. What it was for sure, he couldn’t remember, but he had a feeling Axel and Demyx were going to pay.

Once his head stopped pounding and the room stopped spinning.

And if he could get that weight off of his side.

He paused and glanced over to find an arm. A very warm arm, granted, but still, not exactly what he was expecting. He almost didn’t want to know who it belonged to. But, he glanced up more so and saw Saix sleeping soundly beside him.

What the hell did he do last night?

He quickly checked to make sure he was completely dressed. Luckily, he was.

He slowly began to move, trying to wriggle his way out from under the berserker’s arm, but Saix just tightened his hold on him.

Oh man this was awkward. He would just have to wake the other up.

“Seven…”

He frowned. His throat really hurt and his voice was all scratchy. What the heck?

But, it was still enough to get Saix to stir. His eyes slowly opened and he stared at Xemnas.

Neither of them moved or said anything. They just stared.

After a seven or so minute staring match, Xemnas sighed and closed his eyes.

“Seven, please inform me of what happened and as to why we are in your room and your bed…together.”

“You passed out from drinking too much. I was a bit drunk as well and couldn’t make it to your room.”

Xemnas opened one eye,

“And that is all?”

“…..No.”

Xemnas opened both of his eyes and frowned, “What else?”

“It was probably because you were drunk, but once you woke up again you erm, tried to um…”

Xemnas stared at him in horror, “Oh god…”

“I did manage to stop you though.”

But Xemnas didn’t really hear him, he buried his head in his hands and groaned.

“I’m going to ******** kill Axel and Demyx.”

He sighed and glanced up at Saix.

“I apologize for my actions last night seven, it will not happen again.”

“Um sir it’s-”

“But I will make sure that Axel and Demyx are never allowed to plan things like this ever again!”

“Sir really its-”

“Do they not realize the repercussions of their actions? I mean seriously I should-”

This time, Saix cut Xemnas off by kissing him roughly and pulled away, looking him straight in the eyes.

“Sir. Its fine.”

Xemnas stared at him, shell shocked at what Saix had just done. Saix blinked, waved a hand in front of Xemnas’ face and then shrugged, pulling the other into his arms and going back to sleep.

By mid afternoon everyone else was either starting to wake up or move around. Axel was in a very, very good mood, regardless of the fact he had a small hangover, and was babbling incessantly to Roxas who just nodded every once in awhile, looking very tired. They had yet to see Xemnas, which was a good thing, he hoped, and a few of them were at the table laughing about what they did remember from the party. Xigbar was actually thinking of some other ways to get Xemnas drunk again.

When Xemnas actually did decide to show himself, he was of course followed by Saix. As he walked towards the room everyone else was in, Demyx and Axel quickly darted to the end of the room, putting as much distance between themselves and Xemnas. Yet, surprisingly, Xemnas did not go after either of them. He merely sat down with everyone else and seemed to ignore the two. They looked to each other and hesitantly went back over, but would be ready to get the hell out of there if Xemnas showed any signs of hostility.

Xemnas finally glanced up at them and had a cruel smirk.

“Eigh, nine,” He said coolly, causing the two to shiver, “I have come up with a…suitable punishment for you both.”

They both gulped, “D-Do we still get to live?”

Xemnas’ smirk seemed to grow, “Oh yes. You will. Though you may want to kill yourself afterward. Who knows?”

The two looked at each other, both pale and very afraid.

“W-What do we have to do?”

Xemnas nodded to Saix who grabbed the two of them, causing them to squeak.

“Take them to the room.”

“What room?”

Xemnas just smirked, “You’ll see.”

Saix took the two and put them into a room. He then left the room and shut the door, locking it. Axel and Demyx blinked.

“Um…”

“Why’re we in a white room? Can we leave?”

There were speakers in the room and soon they heard Xemnas’ voice coming from the speakers.

“No, you two are being punished. This room has been designed so that you cannot escape at all. And, to add to that misery, for the next week and a half, you will hear nothing but this song,”

The two sat there, a bit confused and then the song started.

“Jingle Bells? That’s it? Haha wow superior you’re really lacking in torture ideas.” Axel leaned back, not bothered at all by the song. Demyx bobbed his head and sang along.

“We shall see eight. Enjoy your week. We’ll come to check on you every so often until the time is up.”

Axel shrugged and closed his eyes. “Whatever. This will be nothing, right Dem?”

”I like this song!”

“Heh, see?”

Xemnas merely smirked and left the room, Saix by his side.

“Seven, how long do you think they can stand it?”

“I would figure only a few hours, sir.”

Xemnas nodded, “Then we’ll come back then to check on them.”

Now, Jingle Bells is a classic Christmas song. Axel wasn’t going to be bothered by it at all. So what if it was repetitive? It was just a song. Big deal. This would be the easiest punishment he’d gone through in awhile, he could just sleep through the song.

Or so he thought.

Two hours went by and Demyx stopped singing along. Axel rubbed his head as he felt a headache coming on. That jingle was getting really annoying. He hadn’t even managed to sleep for thirty minutes. It just kept going and going.

“Axel! This is starting to get old…” Demyx whined.

“Eh, well just, let just try and ignore it and talk about something. I mean I’m sure we could drown it out.”

Demyx shook his head, “It’s too loud. I don’t think this is going to be as easy as we thought.”

”Oh come on! This is nothing! We can’t let it get to us, ok?”

Demyx bit his lip and nodded hesitantly. Axel leaned back and closed his eyes, rubbing his temples. Eventually they would just get use to it.

It was another three hours before Xemnas and Saix arrived to check on the two. Demyx was huddled in a corner, covering his ears while Axel was banging his head on the wall, yelling ‘Make it stop’ over and over. Xemnas grinned.

“Such a shame. To think the first day isn’t even up. But I do think they’ll learn their lesson, don’t you Saix?”

Saix nodded, a cruel smirk on his lips. “Most definitely sir. I don’t think they’ll cross you like that again.”

“I would think not. Now, let us return to my chambers.”

Xemnas smirked and led Saix out of the room, leaving Demyx and Axel to suffer for the next week and a half. Xemnas was quite confident that neither of them would object to the new ban on Christmas Carols. He grinned wickedly, he was also very sure that neither of them would dare to cross him again. Maybe this Christmas holiday really did give good gifts…

The final observational report of entry #173 of VII: All in all, the experience was interesting to say the least. I do believe that Axel and Demyx have learned to keep celebrations and more especially holiday music (they twitch at even the slightest jingle from a bell), to themselves. Though I will eventually have to thank the two for helping everyone become a bit…closer. Things are much nicer here. I have benefited greatly from all of this. Everyone has yet to tell Xemnas exactly what he did when he was wasted, but we all have come to an agreement that it is for the best. Though, the superior has refused all alcohol. He says it’s because he does not want to suffer another hangover but I believe its subconscious as well. But it seems that Xigbar has been trying to find some other way to get Xemnas drunk, it’ll be interesting if it ends up working. Though I think Xaldin will prevent him from doing anything too stupid. But, still I must admit that I find the superior more…fun when he has been drinking. I do almost hope that Axel and Demyx will dare to celebrate another holiday similar to Christmas. I am curious to see what other punishments Xemnas might have in store for them. To end this report, I shall make one last note to thank Axel and Demyx. I have another report to give to the superior, only this time in his bedroom. Thanks for the gift eight and nine.


~Owari~
 

[Okamikiba]

bravo bravo amazing story yay a vexmarxu couple yay  

[beehive130]

this is me laughing hysterically.