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I think that I'll put my some what story on here...
yea, I will...
It’s a Bet!
Disclaimer: Yes, I am God who owns your damn soul (Hey, it was half off from Satan; you would have done the same. Souls are not cheep ya know!), But even though I am he who is all mighty... I still don't own Naruto.
This story is meant to be funny and to tickle your funny bone and if it doesn't, don't kill the writer; kill the person who's a bit better then you. Anyway this is a Kakashi and Iruka pairing because that's the way I wanted to write it. Anyway I hope you like it. Also before we start I would like to thank my Beta for helping me. This story's for you Sempai!
A/N: Nice hand writing. Chicken scratch.
Understand. Good, just so I don't lose ya (or myself in the matter of fact). Also OOC! For god's love I'm just a person who has no life. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Home alone, a man that was making himself very busy with working to run from a fact. A fact, that time to time gets us all, but it seemed to hold on to the poor teacher like cat to catnip. Loneliness. It haves a different approach to everyone, and comes & goes as it likes. Sometimes you can't let that get you down, just look at the man folding his clothes, but just like a fact there is fate. Now fate is an evil little prat who likes to screw your life upside down and she had her eyes on Iruka for some time now. Making bets and telling lies to good old Fact, now who do we know that's just too different to be with such a man? And started doing what, to those who can't think out side the box. Now on with the story and off with this stupid long thingy of words.
~
"I have to grade those papers, make dinner, make this weeks plans for class, clean my house and ... Hmm?" Looking down from his list of whatnots to do that day, he saw something in the corner of his eye. In with his clothes there was something that didn't belong, reaching deep with in his own clothing he pulled out what had seemed to be...
I must be seeing things. I don't believe I have that color boxers. Way to bright, loud and ... and Orange?
Holding up a pair of tatter orange boxers with writing all over it, it gave the look of Naruto but had a much different feel. Putting them to his own waste the person who owns them must be a big guy. Iruka had to fold the sides in a bit just to not look so skinny and depraved of food when he held it up to himself. In the right hand corner leg was a little sign like the ones you find on the hideous never-should-be-let-out-in-to-the-world books.
There seemed to be written all over with "happy birthday" by different people, and written in nice hand writing across butt was in large print "SMEXY." Laughing a little at who might wear them he couldn't stop from waiting to read the long notes on the side. Now the teacher knew very well that who ever own these boxers would not want him to read it. Even if it is odd to use it as a piece of paper, but Iruka couldn't seem to keep his little nose out of it. Laying them down, he took one look around the room to make sure no one was going to pop in and well think of him as being a pervert. Flopping on this bed he started to read. One was a nice readable hand writing that he would give an A for, and the other was mostly chicken scratch that he couldn't seem to get the feeling that he read this hand writing before, but where?
** So how do you like your D-day so far?
I hate it...
What! Why? You got every dunk chick at you heals to play with and your not happy?
Yep. I wish they would get a clue. I need more beer.
Well, tell them you’re with someone.
I did. I was told that "what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her."
Well you should get laid. God, see that guy over there.
The one with the scar across his nose?
**
Iruka jump a little and touched his face, trailing a finger over the dent that seemed to run across his cheeks.
They couldn't be talking about me? Could they? No, that would be silly; there are lots of people who have a scar on there faces.
Taking a shaky breath Iruka looked back at the boxers he started to read faster, trying to think of people who had a mark on such face but could not remember any that would help.
** Yeah, isn't he cute? I bet he tease like mango. Yummy.
No, more like strawberry. With no sugar, sweet as is.
Oh, I didn't know you swing that way, go buy him a drink; you dog, and take him while he's still drunk.
Are you mad?! No wait, I take that back... Anyway he hates me.
How do you know that? Did you do something to him?
Yeah, I took his favorite student, I told him off, Oh, and just the FACT that he hates me. I don't think that Iruka could stand to be with me more then a second, let alone to have a one night stand.
***
"I knew IT!" Feeling smart and worried at the same time. "They're talking about me, but why? Like I could stand out in a crowed." He's commented dripping with sarcasm missing the real important clue of who own said boxers.
***
You need to get over it and have some fun, or it will be the death of you, Kakashi.
**
Iruka jump once more to his feet.
"KAKASHI?!?!"
Backing away from the orangey piece of clothing; thinking that the famous copy-nin would come out of nowhere and kill him for finding out his secret. Locking all his windows and the front door he started to pace his living room trying not to freak.
"I will go back hand them to the lady at the cleaners and it will be the end of this madness. Yes, that will work, but what if he finds out I had them? What would I say? I could kill him? More like I would kill myself just seeing his masked face before he got to yell a word to me. I could avoid him, or just never give them back and he will never have to know. Yes, that sounds the best. Oh, dear lord help me," gasping for air that just wouldn't come, he was glad no was around for they might think he gone mad and really needed to go into very much needed help. He sat in the middle of his floor and tried to claim down, but only thing he could think of was that Kakashi thought he hated him.
"Do I hate him?" Tilting his head forgetting everything, he thought of all the times he meet him, and most of all why would just said person like Him?! Of all the people in the town he had to like, it had to be him. A plain, boring, nice guy that was a teacher for what he plans to do for the rest of his life. He couldn't do anything that seemed to place him apart from the rest of the ninja world. No bad rep, no weird marks, even the mark across his nose seemed to be plain and not an exiting story to hear, no love life that people would just die to have that much kinky fun, and he even didn't think he was cute or hott. So why?
"I have to get over this somehow. It looks like this was written some time ago and maybe it was just something you can get over with in days, like-err-like a stupid crush." Feeling much better after making himself believe a lie; he got up and started to unlock everything. Thinking it was foolish even to do something like it, I mean come on he's a Jounin, if he wanted to come in and kill him, it couldn't be that hard.
"Now I think about it; this must be a misunderstanding." Laughing at himself he turn to go back to fold the rest of his clothes.
"I really don't care what you think it is, but I need those boxers" Iruka's heart shot right out of his chest. "If I don't get those back by today; Kakashi going to kill me." Falling to the floor Iruka turn to see a dog sitting on his chair next to a wide open window that he couldn't remember opening.
"W-Who are you?" The pale (well as pale as he could get with a tan) teacher ask.
"I recommend that we keep that to ourselves. Anyway..." Jumping over to the smexy pair of boxer he tried to take a grab for it, if Iruka hadn't been first to get them. "Hey, we went through this all ready. I need those back." As the little dog lazy sat in front of the poor Chuunin. Not knowing what to say, the brown-eye man look at the dog as wondering if someone was mad at him in heaven and give him such bad luck.
"Look buddy we can do the easy way or the hard and right now I don't feel like kicking your a**..." With a flash of anger in his eyes, he wasn't going to let a mutt talk so lowly of him.
"And what makes you think you would win? I'm pretty good ninja if I say so myself, and with you being a mutt and all. I could win without really trying at all." Iruka shot back to the brown dog.
"I don't want to fight, but Kakashi freaking right now because those are his lucky pair. And if he found out that I found them and left it with a strange person, he would have my head on a plate. Now tell me I came just in time before you read it."
"W-W-well, he w-wouldn't be that upset, would he be, if I did?" Tightening his grip on the clothe, thinking of the evil things Kakashi could do to him (Now you perverts out there stop thinking of our favorite. brown hair uke tie to a bed post, I'm very disappointed in you all ... but now that I think about it that would make a wonderful smut sc- ok I'll stop now *wipes drool off chin*).
"Hell yeah! So if I were you, I would hand them over and tell no one of this misunderstanding." Walking up to Iruka, waiting for the orangey clothe.
"B-But what if he finds out I had them. He'll kill me!" Biting his knuckle, to keep fear from leaving his lips like a girlie scream.
"I can't just hang around here all day till you give them to me." Grabbing a paint leg the nin-dog gave a hard tug; witch in turn the Chuunin gave a hard tug.
Now you might think this will go on forever till there is that evil green eyes fate coming to play.
"RRRRRIIIIIIIPPPPPPP"
Two pairs of wide eyes looked down at the now two piece of clothing, without a second moment they point the finger in blame (or paw, what ever comes first).
"Look at what you did! You want us dead mutt-"
"If you have given me in the first place this would have never happ-"
"Well, if you hadn't came uninvited-"
"I was doing what I was told! If you didn't steal them-"
"Steal?! I found them in my clothing, so don't call me a thei-"
"I'll call you what ever I want! Just wait till he finds out what you-"
"ME! You had to try to grab them from me! If he took more care of things and-"
"Well, you should keep you little brown nose of things that don't belong to you-"
"Well, why did he write something so stupid on boxers?!"
"Don't ask me how his mind works! I'm just his nin-dog doing-"
"I don't care what you are you little MUTT!"
"Fine! I was going to help you get out of getting your a** kick but I guess I'll leave you-"
"Like hell you’re going anywhere!"
Thinking fast he stuffed the little pudgy dog in to a clean pillow case with a nice gift of bit marks on his arm. Looking to the wiggling bag in his hand to the his own piece of rip boxers in the other hand he thought of all the ways he could kill the mutt without anyone knowing it was him. Till a loud "Pop" was heard coming from the bag snapping him out of his thoughts. The pillow case went limp and a bit of smoke was coming from it. Dumping it over hoping to find a dog with a pant leg in his mouth; only to find a sad empty sad sack.
(I tell you now, that the writer of this story has plugged your ears so the curse coming from Iruka will not get this story rated up a notch for bad, very bad, lang-o. Thank you for your time and have a nice day.)
Tossing the pillow case on the floor with a little to much force; he grab his shoes while running out of his apartment in to the noon sunny day. While hopping on one foot to get his last shoe on with a plus of on lookers giving him, what they do best, weird looks. Thinking with his luck that on this sunny no-cloud-in-sight day it would end up raining to show his day could get much worse. Jumping to the roofs he spotted the dog half way in the training field jogging with the other half of the boxers in his mouth.
"Have to get him out of sight before it’s too late." The Chuunin went into full ninja mood, running as fast as his legs would let he mange to grab the dog by the tail with a cry that was music to his ears.
And he thought he was better then me, Ha, looks like the table has turn on you mutt!
With all his might he threw the dog so far away he looked like a star lost in the day light looking for the night fall.
"HA! And you said that you were better then me! Well, look at you now! MUHAHAHA!!" Iruka overjoyed that he saved his sorry a** and Kakashi would never know what had happen to his dog. Till, yes again with the till, Fate would have it, took his joy out into woods and shot it dead, leaving it for the wild animals to feast on the dead rotting body.
"Would you mind telling me why you just tossed my nin-dog, and started to cackle like a mad man?"
Without looking behind him, he placed a claim hand over his eyes. "Please, tell me that Kakashi is not right be hided me, and if he is, you would mind lying to me."
"He's not. Will you answer the question now?"
Turning around, slowly taking his hand away from his face finding that it was only copy-nin giving him a bored look.
"You lie to me!" Pointing a finger, wide soft brown eyes stared with fear.
"Don't blame me you asked me to lie-" looking at Iruka hand, raising in eyebrow with curiosity, "What's in your hand?" With only getting a glimpse of it, it was gone just as fast.
"N-Nothing." Slowly Iruka started to back up with the orange pant leg hidden behind his back. "Its-It’s just something Naruto wanted me to fix up for him." As he was happy that his father for passing the gift of thinking up fast lies when needed. "Really now. Then you won’t mind if I take a look at it then. I could help with you with it." Reaching his hand out.
"It’s just a bit of sewing. Nothing big." He was now taking big steps backwards to get as far as he could from the other man.
"Then you won’t mind me having a look at it then." Stepping in pace with him, his eye widen with the sense of terror coming over him.
"Well, to be frank, I think Naruto would mind so... I guess I am goin-" The Chuunin smiled as sweetly as one could to sugar coat this moment, but his back hit something hard. Turning to find it was only the person right in front of him. Thinking fast he ran into the woods to hide, till he could think of a way to get out of this sticky mess. It was hurting his head how he had to think up stuff so suddenly just because a pair of boxers got into the wrong pile of clothes. Taking a small weapon out of his pouch he stuffed what was left of Kakashi belonging into it.
"This is just plan silly that I have to be out here with his crap and not at home working on work that needs to be done before the weekend is over."
"Then learn to loosen' up." Looking at the base of the tree he was at the moment hiding in to find a gravity defining hair Kakashi just below his feet looking up at him.
"Crap." He started to run, but in mid-jump someone grab his arms tossing him back to the earth. Landing on his feet ready to fight, but it was too late, without a moment left he was pined up to a tree.
"Now let’s see what you have here that you won’t show me." Holding him to the tree with an arm pushing on his chest, he slowly reached into Chuunin pouch, pulling out the main cause of this story. Backing up to hold up what was left of his favorite pair of boxers he went pale (well, as pale as a pale person can get).
"Wha-Wha-Wha?" was all the copy-nin could say. Iruka scratched the back of his head trying to make it less of a problem then what it really was; well it always worked for Naruto when he needed to get out of problems.
"Well, it’s a funny story, you see-" The teacher cut himself off when he looked at the older man's face, or what might have been if he wasn't wearing a mask. Backing up from Iruka as though he was foaming at the mouth.
As if the wind was talking for the Jounin, it past though the moment in a gust. Sending all the words that were never said to the ears of a soft brown eyes man.
"You know, don't you?"
A moment later when the wind settle, leaving dead leafs and fallen cherry blossom to sway to a slow stop on the ground before them. Or more I say him. Alone, the older man left in a puff of smoke, to hide away to his own demises.
"Did he just run away from me?" Iruka stared at the spot where a person used to stand at. "He could have hurt me, scare me to death, or just kill me on the spot, and he chose to run... I thought there would be at lest a fight or something." The sound of disappointment was lost in the words he spoke.
"Yeah, you would never know at times he be a big p***y."
Wide eye he looked at his feet that seem to be talking to him, only to find the little brown dog. "I thought I tossed to at lest across town."
"You did." Glaring at the man that hurt his poor tail, but that wasn't going to stop him from ending this madness. "Well, why are you standing here? Go after him, I bet right now he's on his couch, being way too harsh with himself."
"Why would he do that? It was my fault ... well more like yours." Looking at the mutt crossly.
"Well, don't go beating yourself up by blaming yourself for everything that has happen." The remark was dripping with sarcasm like venom from a very deadly snake ready for the kill.
"Anyway." As the Chuunin tried to get back on subject. "Would it help any if I went?" Asking more the sky with free birds flying away from all that holds man down by earthly things.
"You never know, but incase if you need me, which I hope is never, just whistle." Walking way leaving the teacher to his toughs, spending the next half hour pacing on a branch of a tree thinking of every out come that there could be to this outcome.
"You might make a difference." Spotting a girl looking at him with wonderful green eyes half covered with light purple shades. "I don't mean to butt in, but you look like you needed a little push on to the right road in life." And with that she went on her way picking flowers with a sweet smile.
Odd, I didn't feel her charkra signature, or heard her coming. I must be losing my touch or maybe she a- Turning to ask the child who she really was, but found he was once more alone.
Why am I all ways the one that gets left behind?! As he stomped like a two year old, crossing his arms with a huff.
"Grrrr..." Glairing at nothing hoping to put a big hole in it, wondering what he should do. "I got it!" Standing he suck in as much air as he could, blowing it all out making only the most wonderful whistle a dead moose could give. "Damn, I should have told him before he left that I couldn't whistle... Now what?" Thinking of were he could get a cheap whistle, one loud proud and somewhat sounded impatient was made just above his head. It was like chasing a ghost, when he check every where around him it was nothing but the Earth, wind, and a pair of shades.
"Hey, are these..."
"I didn't know you would need me so soon or I would have never left." Jumping up next to the dolphin giving him a deadpan look. Pulling the shades into his pocket for later to worry about.
"Do you still have the other piece of the boxers?"
"Yea, why? You not going to go all fangirl on me, are you?"
"NO! God why do I EVEN try-Claim, claim. Ok, I was thinking..." Whispers into the perked dog ear. "Well? Do you think it would work?"
"No, but like hell we have anything better." His droopy eyes looked more tried then his normal saggy brown eyes.
"Here I'll make it wroth you while, I'll cook you anything you want for dinner."
"Add a breakfast and lunch and you’re got yourself a deal."
"Fine..." I can't believe I have to make deals with a mutt, have I sunk that low? Sighing he shook the dogs paw. "Alright, get going mutt."
"I have a name you know, it not like I call you meat sack? Now do I, meat sack?"
"Ok, Ok. God. Just hurry." Walking away from the mumbles grunts from the floppy face dog with the other half of the piece of clothing in hand. **************************
Ok so I’ll stop here…… and maybe update later….
Tybalt-chan · Wed May 30, 2007 @ 11:45pm · 0 Comments |
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