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Sorry, I still haven't got any ideas for the next scene for Rina Balan so I'm posting this. These are the amazing Kit Quotes, funny lines or scenes from the life of Kit...
“Yep,” said Kit, “The fate of the world rests on the shoulders of a bunch of idiots who spend their free time in burp contests.”
“Hey,” said Kit, “I was acquitted of…most of those crimes.”
“I’m not saying you’re stupid, I’m just saying that you’re not at all intelligent.”
“What’d you do? Fall out the smart tree and miss every branch on the way down?”
“I would like to start by saying, Kit, this is a video tape. I can’t actually hear any of your threats, no matter how interesting they are.”
~ Larry Goldman
“Speak again and loose the ability to do so forever.”
“That’s right,” said Kit, “I screamed and then he exploded.”
“You’re kind of blunt aren’t you?”
~Michael Trent
“Is she going to be okay?” asked Richard as he walked in, “When will she wake?”
“Um,” said the nurse.
“I’m already awake,” said Kit and Richard twirled around to see the strange girl he’d rescued standing right behind him.
“Huh?” asked Richard, “How did-?”
“Are you the guy who saved me?” asked Kit.
“Yeah,” said Richard and she leaned forward to sniff him.
“You smell weird,” said Kit.
“Royal blood flows through my veins,” said Princess Kitana.
“Do you want it to stay there?” asked Kit.
“Let me put it this way,” said Kit, “I have a very big hammer and you have lots of bones. I’ll let your imagination do the rest.”
“Let me respond to that in the following way,” said Kit and she punched him in the mouth, “Gross, there are teeth in my knuckles.”
“Wow,” said Kit, “I really don’t care.”
“If it has to do with any member of my team, it has to do with me.”
“Oh s**t! Oh s**t! Oh s**t! Oh s**t! I’m going to die! I’m going to die! I’m going to die! I’m going to die!” BANG!!!!! “I’m okay.”
“Anyone can learn to fight but no one can learn to write.”
“You like to panic, don’t you?”
“We’re like superheroes,” said Kiki, “With like secret identities and stuff.”
“Before you start flying off of roofs,” said Kit as she took the mask off, “You two will have to learn how not to die.”
“We know how not to die,” said Bunny.
“I mean,” said Kit, “You two won’t last five seconds in a real fight.”
“Hey,” said Bunny indignantly.
“I call them as I see them,” said Kit and she tripped them both with one kick.
“Ow,” said Kiki from the floor.
“I want to do this alone,” said Kit, “I don’t want you two to help. But if I ditch you guys the annoyingly all-powerful Powers That Be will hack inside my brain and curse me with eternal torment. I value my life, what little meaning it still holds for me it is still mine. So we are going to have to work together. I don’t like either of you, mostly because I don’t like anyone, ever. But seeing as how we are all stuck here in this I’ll have to get over it and so will the both of you. However I refuse to work with a couple of idiots, who are only going to slow me down for the five seconds you manage to stay alive.”
“Thanks,” said Kiki.
“So this is what I propose,” said Kit, “I will train you, teach you how to fight. So you two won’t end up dead and I won’t end up with brain made of cream cheese.”
“I managed to set his coat on fire.”
“You’re truly pathetic you know that?”
“My dad’s a king,” said Rachel.
“Really?” asked Kit, “Mine too.”
“My dad’s the king of being a drunken son of a b***h. What’s your dad king of?”
“Zegwar.”
“What’s Zegwar?”
“It’s a planet,” said Kit and Rachel made a noise, “In a different reality.”
“Let’s just say, if it’s an illegal offense I’ve probably managed to do it.”
“Hey, that’s a short list of my crimes,” said Kit.
“There are forty-two separate offenses,” said Bunny.
“Yeah, but that doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface of the crap I didn’t get caught doing.” Bunny stared at her.
“Only in the Karen Castle can I fire a gun at a demon in my bedroom, have my father ask ‘was that a gun shot?’ I reply, ‘maybe’ as I slip the gun back into its holster and have no follow up questions.”
“So what if I used to rob banks?”
“Have I been here before?” asked Kit as she looked around, “I think I’ve been here before. I swear I’ve been here before.”
“We’re almost four-hundred years in the past. How can you’ve possibly been here before?” asked Sam and she spotted a wanted poster with her picture on it.
“Yeah, I’ve been here before.”
“Get off the road, you moron!” yelled Kit, “They’re in a car; they can’t run you over if you’re up to stories.”
“Hanging around with you makes me feel smart.”
“And Bunny would be which brainless drooling monkey?”
“I’m not a brainless drooling monkey,” said Bunny angrily.
“So that one then,” said Kit and she sat down in her desk.
“Mark, you’re my brother and I love you very much, but so help me God, you bug me one more time and I will drive something hard and sharp into your brain.”
“I’m going to rip out your rib cage and wear it as a hat.”
“Do you like your tongue inside your mouth? Then I suggest you shut your mouth so I can’t reach it.”
“I’m going to pull your tongue out through your nose.”
“I’m going to strangle you with your intestines.”
“If I could use my hand I’d strangle you.”
“Please, stop talking, now.”
“SHUT THE HELL UP!”
“Are you kidding? I’ve been doing this for twelve years. My parents think I’m a troubled teen going through a phase.”
“I could make a career out of sneaking in and out of any house.”
“This lock isn’t even a challenge.”
“I have a date with the devil, literally.”
“I don’t get scared get that straight right now.”
“So where’d you find me unconscious?”
“Who’d want to kill you?” asked the man.
“What’s today?” asked Kit.
“Wednesday.”
“I’m going to go with demons, lots and lots of demons.”
“Look! Over there!” yelled Kit and he looked where she’d pointed as she ran away thinking, “I can’t believe he fell for that.”
“I can’t believe I fell for that,” thought the man as he chased her.
“There are only two kinds of things in this world. There are the things that are trying to kill me and the things that aren’t. Of course the things that aren’t trying to kill me are in very small numbers.”
“There is a lot of stuff that’s trying to kill me. There are people and things, not to mention those things that you know technically fit under the heading of ‘people’ but it just doesn’t feel right.”
“Do you know what your sin is Miss Thompson?” asked the man.
“Who me?” asked Kit, “Personally I’m a fan of all seven. But right now I’d have to go with rage.” She then used the last of her strength to punch him in the face.
“Go to hell,” said Kiki.
“Been there done that and I even took the guided tour. And you know what I learned? The Devil’s boring, Death’s an airhead and Dracula owes me twenty bucks because he can’t play poker to save his immortal a**.”
“You’re joking right?” asked Bunny.
“Of course,” said Kit, “There’s no guided tour hell.”
“Kit?” asked Bunny as she walked away.
“To me life is like water. For the first part of my life the water of my life was in a bucket. Then I found out who I was, that I was adopted, that I had magic and that I was supposed to fight evil monsters, and it was like it was dumped into a toilet. Then when I decided to go and fight it was like I flushed it.”
“I’ll always be here,” said Kit, “I’ll always be right here next to you, ready to protect you with all that I have.”
“You always stand by your family,” said Kit, “And you never give up on a friend. And if your friends are close enough to your heart they are your family. So I promise you guys, my friends, my family, that I will always protect you all.”
“Once upon a time there was a girl named Kit who just couldn’t quite forget that there was a once upon a time.”
“Mission successful,” said Jane, “Over.”
“Good,” said Kit and she put down the radio.
“You didn’t say ‘over’,” said Kevin.
“I know,” said Kit with a smile, “And it’s going to bug her for the rest of the day.”
“Oh, that can’t be good.”
“Kit Thompson! What did you do?”
“Why do you automatically assume it was something I did?” asked Kit and he glared at her, “There might have been a small explosion.”
“We gave a small problem,” said Kit.
“And by small,” said Kent, “You mean?”
“Gigantically huge.”
“Jimmy, you pervert, leave her alone!”
“Jimmy, you told her I wasn’t a girl!?”
“In all of the books I’ve read about the Monkey King,” said Jimmy, “They never mentioned anything about memory loss.”
“Shut up, Jimmy.”
“John, if you enter my mind again I will obliterate your consciousness.”
The TV blinked and hummed as the video started.
“Hello, my name is Tyler Mitchell and me and my friends have just traveled back in time five thousand years,” said the Tape-Tyler as the Tyler in the room took off his glasses, “Oh right, Lizzy, you next.”
“Hi,” said the Tape-Lizzy as she appeared on screen, “I’m Elizabeth Myers and we’re part of a secret magical organization with in the law firm of Goldman and Trent. Our team is called the Time Travel Trio. This is our fearless leader Kit Thompson.” The camera turned to show Kit. The Kit in the room opened her mouth and promptly fell over.
“Did our fearless leader just faint?” asked the Lizzy in the room.
“I remember this time she blew up a solar system.”
“It was uninhabited!”
“Here’s some advice,” said Kit, “If you want to live and you see me running I suggest you keep up.”
“It wasn’t exactly my fault that the dinosaurs got whipped out.”
“Oh, s**t-.”
“Kit,” said Rachel, “Strangling your comrades is not the best idea.”
“We’re under attack,” said Kit.
“By what?” asked Leon.
“Evil monkeys and lots of them.”
“What?”
“Monkeys!”
“Dude!” yelled Kit, “You’re like Dracula!”
“Yes,” said Dracula.
“Like THEE Dracula!”
“Yes.”
“THEE!”
“Yes.”
“Dude!”
“Yes.”
“Why are you here?”
“To see you.”
“No way!”
“Yes.”
“Totally cool!”
“It would appear so.”
“This is beyond amazing!”
“Apparently.”
“So cool!”
“Please stop doing that.”
“So how did your psych eval go?” asked Leon.
“Well apparently I have a martyr complex and issues with ‘Anger’ and ‘Trust’ and ‘Authority’ and ‘Listening’,” said Kit while making sarcastic air-quotes, “And I don’t know I wasn’t really paying attention.”
“I was thinking a spring wedding,” said Kiki and she waved her hands in the air, “Oh and with doves.”
“Yeah, doves!” said Sally, “What about you, Kit?” The whole room went silent. Kit and weddings would be an interesting topic.
“Well I was thinking,” said Kit as she mimicked Kiki’s hand movements, “That you’re all nuts.” Kent let out a small sigh and Kit hit him on the shoulder. They both smiled and laughed silently.
“That blur looked strangely familiar.”
~ Sam Williams
“It’s a plan in progress.”
“That’s a really big fire.”
Mr. Harrison droned on and Kit just couldn’t pay attention. She felt so distracted today. She stared out the window and just zoned out. Suddenly she stood up and knocked her books to the ground.
“Kit Thompson!” yelled Mr. Harrison but she paid no attention. Her eyes were blank as she stared out the window.
“It’s time,” said Kit, “That smell.” She turned and opened the window.
“Kit, you psycho!” yelled Kiki, “Shut that window, it’s freezing.”
“That smell,” said Sarah and she too stood up. They both jumped out the window.
“KIT!” yelled Kent. Kit grabbed Sarah’s hand and ran out into the grass. Then it began to snow. For what seemed like no reason they began to dance. When Kent asked her about it later all she said was: “I just love the snow and that first snow smell.”
“Kit was trying desperately to stay conscious. She was battling a foe truly worthy of her strength, power and mind. She was not sure that she could win this time; she could barely keep her head up. It was time for the crushing the blow. She readied herself for-,” said Kit and she raised her arms like she was in a fight.
“Miss Thompson,” said Mr. Bennett, her Chemistry teacher, “Please stop telling stories in my classroom.”
“I am not telling a story Mr. Bennett,” said Kit, “I’m narrating my life.”
“Narrating?” asked Mr. Bennett.
“Yeah,” said Kit, “Chemistry, the ultimate enemy. No mortal can stay awake while any teacher, especially Mr. Bennett, drowns on about the worst subject in the universe in a monotonous tone.”
“I hate to say ‘I told you so’ but-.”
“Well if you hate it don’t say it.”
“I TOLD YOU SO! They’re evil!”
“You say everything’s evil.”
“And I’m always right.”
“Out of sight, out of mind.”
“Do you have a plan?”
“Does running count as a plan?”
“I live in the world of the six D’s: Dead, Dark, Demonic, Damned, Disturbed and Destructive. That is my world.”
“Everybody has demons,” said Kit, “Mine just happened to have the corporeal bodies, the super powers, the vendettas and the evil end of the world plans.”
“Scream, run, hide is a very legitimate plan.”
“When it was all said and done she learned one thing. There is no such thing as a happily ever after and only for the lucky is there even an after.”
“Note to self: Do not block flying headstones with my ankle.”
“By the way I am thee Kit Thompson,” said Kit and the girl fainted, “And that never gets old.”
“The only time people hang around with me is to make their problems seem smaller. It’s really hard to complain about a C- when the person you’re talking to is dodging fire balls for her life, yet amazingly some can do it.”
“You know you’ve been in this business too long when someone comes up to you screaming, ‘It’s the end of the world!’ and your response is to yawn and ask very calmly and nonchalantly, ‘Again?’”
“Let’s put it this way, there are a lot of people who wouldn’t mind seeing my entrails ripped out.”
“It’s not illegal until you get caught.”
“I see dumb people.”
“What’s going on, Kit?” asked Coop.
“What’s going on, Kit?” asked Kit in a mocking, deep voice, “What no, ‘Hello, Kit,’ no, ‘How are you, Kit?’ no, ‘How’s your life turned out, Kit?’? I’ve been gone for six years and all you can say is ‘What’s going on Kit?’?”
“Well clearly you’re still mental.”
“I was all ‘ooh!’ and you were all ‘eek!’ and he was all ‘ow!’ and they were all ‘woo!’ and then I was like ‘dude!’.”
“What?”
“Uhsherkatilonku?”
“Say that again in English.”
“Would you believe that it was an accident?
“Everyone has problems,” said Kit, “Mine just got collected together and formed their own entity and terrorized a whole other planet for twelve years.”
“How many times do I have to threaten your life on a daily basis?
“Chivalry is dead, thank god.”
“Oh man, I got shot, again.”
“I blew his brain out the back of his skull with my hand.”
“So this is my army of superheroes, the last line of defense?” asked Kit as the chaos spread, “The universe is doomed.”
“I am surrounded by idiots.”
“I hate you.”
“I know.”
“The path of Darkness is the fastest way to power.”
“That may be true yet those who travel too fast will surely trip and fall flat on their faces. And so I’ll be there, sticking my foot out and laughing.”
“You set your school on fire?” asked Principal Hurston.
“No, only the gym,” protested Kit and she stood up to look at the file and he showed where he saw the description, “Oh, right. That time the entire school went up in flames.” She sat back down as he began to read her record.
“Vandalism, breaking curfew, breaking and entering, parole violations, obstruction of justice, kidnapping, hacking, theft, grand theft auto, resisting arrest, under age gambling, assault with a deadly weapon, assault, assaulting a teacher, assaulting a police officer, possession of a controlled substance, possession of cigarettes, under age drinking, fighting, arson and you even been accused of murder?”
“I’m okay, thanks for asking.”
“The way I see it you’re either A - nuts, B - lost your mind, C - crazy, D-deranged, E - insane, F - wacko, G - no longer in possession of your sanity or H - all of the above!”
“So are you going to help or not?”
“Of course I’m going to help.”
“I got my first spell book when I was four; it was ‘Basic Elemental Spells for Beginning Mages.’ I stole it from the library.”
“There are many paths that lead to the same end.”
“Just so you know, you sound like a fortune cookie.”
“My worst memory, let’s see, oh yeah, that time I died wasn’t fun.”
“Did you just growl at me?”
“Maybe.”
“Guaranteed to solve every minor problem by turning it into a major disaster.”
“There are voices in my head.”
“You don’t want to know.”
“Did you hear that?”
“Hear what?” It came again.
“That?”
“What?”
“Oh great, that’s just perfect.”
“I’ve been blown up, stabbed, hung, set on fire, shot, show by arrows, cursed with eternal torment, died, gone crazy, tortured, bludgeoned, hit by a car, drowned and I have even been electrocuted.”
“One of my most disturbing memories is picking up my own body, carrying it away and then burying it. Let’s just say I was having a strange day.”
“Hey you! The drama-king, freak of nature, son-of-a-b***h!” shouted Kit. The man stopped and turned around to look at her.
“Where’d a four year old girl learn those words?” asked the man.
“First off, I ain’t four.”
“Then how old are you?”
“Eighteen.”
“Sure.”
“I sent my consciousness back in time to my four year old body to talk to you.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes, so shut the hell up and listen.”
“That’s so cool.”
“Well, what would you’ve done?”
“For starters, not blow him up.”
“Do you have a plan?”
“I’m working on it.”
“Oh dear god, we’re all going to die.”
“You wanted to pick his brains,” said Kit as she picked up the sword.
“Not off the ground.”
“Why save me, Kit? Why?” asked Sarah.
“Meun tu amatore suo,” said Kit, “For you are precious to me.”
“You’re not very smart are you?”
“Don’t die,” said Kit, “I’m not in the mood to clean up your guts.”
“Don’t be so dramatic!” yelled Kit after her and she fainted, “Perfect.”
Kit got up in the middle of Miss Herman’s speech and walked to the door.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“Out,” said Kit and she pointed upwards as soon as she did it the bell rang.
“How did-?”
“There’s no ‘team’ in ‘I’,” said Kit.
“Isn’t that there’s no ‘I’ in ‘team’?” asked Bunny.
“Not the way I use it.”
“Did you miss me?”
“I’m great, yet I am humble.”
Bang, it was just sound. But it can change a whole life. Bang, can be the last sound a person can hear. It was almost the last sound Kit Thompson would ever hear.
“You’re a vampire, you’re life is much easier than mine.”
“Want to bet? Do you have any idea of what it’s like? Other demons always pressuring me to destroy the world or something. Then there are all the vampire hunters like you always trying to kill me. Then there’s the immortal thing which gets old really fast. Plus I can’t get tan anymore and I get serious blood cravings some days. And do you have any idea how long it takes to clean these fangs?”
“Sometimes it seems like life would be so much easier if I just stopped caring.”
“Life sucks, then you die and then it sucks some more.”
“Touch me and pull back a bloody stub.”
“If you ever try to do this again I will do to your spine what I just did to your front door.” He looked at his door, which was lying in splinters on the floor, and then back at Kit, who was smiling creepily.
“Everyone has nightmares even the monsters,” said Kit.
“What do monsters have nightmares about?”
“Me.”
“She scares me.”
~ Justin Case.
“Knock first or die screaming.”
“You can get used to anything, even killing.”
“It was a minor infraction.”
“You blew up ten city blocks!”
“Leave me alone or I’ll rip off all of your appendages starting with your shortest, understood?” He looked down and swallowed hard.
“They said that it was glorious victory.”
“Then they weren’t the winners.”
“Huh?”
“Winners never talk about glorious victories.”
“Why?”
“That’s because they’re the ones who get to see what the battlefield looks like afterward. It’s the only the losers who have glorious victories.”
“I said she was ignoring us, I didn’t say she wasn’t paying attention.”
~ Steve Peterson
“Sometimes when adults speak all I hear is blah, blah, blah.”
Kit opened the door and saw them fighting fiercely. They stopped and looked at her. She closed the door and they began again.
“I wasn’t meant to be in the world of the light and living. I am a part of the world of the dark and the sort of dead and I always will be.”
“The world needed a miracle so I went out and got one. It’s just that the miracle that’s going to save the world is going to end up killing me.”
“My name’s Kit, that’s all you need to know.”
“They seem boring.”
“Just so you know, you annoy me and I hate you.”
“Can you try not to be stupid for one second, please?”
“I’m going to tell you a story, my story. It’s going to be in my words, how I remember it or in some special cases from what I can piece together. It isn’t a happy story so if that’s what you want, close this book right now. If you want the truth keep reading. It’ll be hard but if you want to know how it ends keep reading.”
“Hey I think she’s cute.”
~ Kent Star
“You will soon learn that I do not care.”
“She’s just totally amazing, guys, if you could just meet her.”
~ Leon Hayes
“People stopped trying to understand Kit a long time ago.”
~ Steve Peterson
“She’s an arrogant little know-it-all,” said Marian.
“Who could have helped if you let her,” said Rachel.
“See, here’s the thing Jack,” said Kit, “I trust you.” She let go and let herself fall.
“You can be very scary sometimes, you know, Kit?”
~ Kiki Price
“Who knew you could be smart?”
“I’m proud of every single one of you, I really am.”
“Tell me, Kit Thompson, what is precious to you? Tell me so you can watch it being destroyed,” said The Great Dark One.
“Everything is precious to me. Every person, demon, animal, plant and rock. I love it all. The good, the bad and most definitely the weird. I love this world and every other world. In fact Kalamazalamara, even you are precious to me.”
“I’m not sure I believe in God and if there is a God all I know is he sure as hell does not like me.”
“Sometimes it’s better to run.”
“I’ve been here and there; I’ve been all around this world and others like it. I’ve been to the past and the future. I’ve even been dead. And so I can honesty say that there is no place like home.”
“The world’s safe,” said Bunny, “What are you going to do now?”
“Sleep a lot.”
“You do realize that I’m not idiot?”
“I love messing with clueless people. It’s just so easy.”
Kit ran into the lab, looked at a sign on a table and read, “Do not touch under any circumstances, very dangerous.” She tossed the sign away and picked up the device.
“You do realize that I can hear you right?”
“I am smarter than you.”
“Quite simply, you are a moron.”
“Me…her…I…she…we…it,” said Kit, “I hate pronouns, and evil clones but mostly I hate pronouns.”
“Well I will, I mean I have, well it’s like happened but not yet but already,” said Kit, “Time travel makes verbs annoying.”
“I once designed a website for controlling people’s minds,” said Kit.
“Well that’s definitely creepy,” said James, “And weird, how’d you do it?”
“He’s an old friend,” said Kit.
“You seem angry,” said Kent.
“Yep.”
“Are you going to punch him in the face?”
“I was kind of planning on it.”
“You say ‘why’ a lot it annoys me,” said Kit.
“Why?” asked Lizzy.
“I’m going to hurt you.”
“I remember this time I was shrunk down,” said Kit.
“What does that have to do with anything?” asked Bunny.
“Nothing, but it’s a funny story.”
“I wonder what locker locks think about all day.”
“Kit, I’m pretty sure that they don’t think.”
“I think they do. And they see everything.”
“That’s creepy.”
“Seriously, it’s funny.”
“But Kit, what you find funny, we just find disturbing.”
“So?”
“Don’t ignore me, I’m needy.”
“Please, leave, me, alone.”
“My first impressions of Tyler and Lizzy: they were nerds.”
“Have you ever noticed how stop lights look like eyes and how no matter what color they are they always look evil?”
“I’m having an ADD moment.”
“A rose by any other name might work better in poetry because the word ‘rose’ rhymes with nothing that has to do with roses.”
“What the hell-?”
“Why? Why the hell am I bothering? You’re just going to screw it up anyway.”
“Charleston Chews, Chewy flavored Nougat-.”
“What’s Nougat?”
“With a delicious chocolaty coating. ‘Chocolaty’ that means no real chocolate was used in the production of this candy.”
“Why does it feel like I’m trapped in a crappy Sci-Fi movie?”
“Things to do, people to see, demons to kill.”
“It’s just one, average, totally ordinary, completely boring, day in the life of me.”
“You run into a lot of trouble?”
“Run into, cause, whatever.”
Kit walked though the grocery store.
“God, the stuff people make, sell, buy and then eat.” She picked up a few jars labeled honey, cheese and chocolate flavored peanut butter.
“Kit, you’re beginning to scare me,” said Tyler.
“Beginning!? Where have you been?” asked Lizzy.
“Sorry about that, lost my temper. In fact this is the first time I’ve lost it like this and nothing’s blown up,” said Kit and a vase across the chamber exploded, “Damn it!”
“I guess I write a lot and when I’m done. I look at what I’ve written. And I every time I think the same thing: ‘In my handwriting some words look more like doodles than actual words’.”
“May you live in interesting times.”
“Isn’t that an ancient Chinese curse?”
“She’s the team leader?”
“That’s kind of what I meant when I said ‘she’s the team leader’.”
“This is just nasty.”
“I figure I’m going to hell anyway, so I might as well have fun while I’m here.”
“Why me?”
“Kit Thompson, use reason,” said Sam.
“Like I have any of that.”
“The stupid things that people say.”
 Zegwarian310 · Fri Sep 21, 2007 @ 03:52pm · 2 Comments |
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