Can you taste the fear on my lips? Or see the vacancy in my eyes? My heart's but a coffin, hollow and dead. To wake up, and find the sheets next to me cold and absent of you. Sometimes I feel like the emptyness might swallow me. I sit at my window and watch the rain fall, how it turns all of the leaves on the ground muddy and sodden. It reminds me of your eyes, autumn's midnight I called them. They held the night sky as well as the damp, cold earth. They twinkled like stars, so far from my reach. When I looked into them, there was so much pain hidden behind them. You pointed to the decaying leaves...then told me that's where you belonged, that your soul was fading with the season. You cursed yourself and spoke of horrible things, claiming no one loved you. Blaming yourself for your family member's suicide, wishing it had been you instead. I tried to take your agony, to drink it like bitter poison. At that moment, I would have done anything for you. You told me you needed love, the kind I couldn't offer with my heart but only with my body. I was scared but if it kept you from harming yourself, I was willing to give myself up. And so I did. Despite my sacrifise, you didn't make it through that dark winter. After that night of loveless passion, you blew your brains out into the river. It just took one bullet. And you were dead.
Like the leaves....
Like the season....
McHuggles · Sat Aug 09, 2008 @ 07:43am · 1 Comments |