some people asked about my past. well here it is in a nut shell.
okay my real mom, i dont claim her to be my mom, to me her name is gina....but any ways, she was 16 when she had me and my dad 20. right after i was born she dumped me and my father. so my dad did his best to raise me. when i was about 4 my dad meet Dodie....well after awhile he had kyle and codie, but didnt notice that she was physically abusing me....
at age 5 i tried to comment suicide, i use to lay across train tracks, and i use to try to drown my self in a lake, on a cattle farm. but nothing work so i started cutting my self at age 6. i rapped my self up in barb ware to see if i could drain dry...i even still have the scares from them today. (18 now)
when my 7th brithday dad broke up with dodie and met juile....i treated her like crap....but would you really blame me....after a year i learned that she wasnt going any where and id opened up to her and she learn why i did all that.....but then gina wanted back into my life.
well as my mom i gladly let her back in....but then she started playing mind games with me. saying that she loved me, but then pushing me away like a pest.she was hurting my heart, with her little mind games. she started driving into depression. and school wasnt any better i never had a firend or even a teacher to talk to.....the kids were bullyed me, cuz i had an irish actsent, so i stopped talking for three years. adventully i grew out of it. i tried to comment suicide once again but nothing seemed to work....
but something changed my life around. my first week of freshmen year at a new school a girl as to sit next to me on the bus. she stair and then randomly asked if i like anime. i turned to her and smiled for the first time in my life. she gave me a reason to stay alive....she became my best friend, i had to protect her. (we're the same age but she acts younger)
everything started to fall into place....on my 16th brithday, Gina called and said that she was letting julie adopt me. i tried so hard not to laugh at her. i just siad well ill think about it. in my mind i was saying ******** you b***h for calling me just to say something that all ready happen when you left me.
my life moved on....i moved away from my friends....it feels like its starting all over again. im growing my axisty issues (abandonment issues) once more.....im growing more and more depressed every day...
and the main reasons why i cant keep a boyfriend is become im to "emo" or they cheat on me and found that their misstriss gives them what they want....
Kuri The Elf · Wed Jun 03, 2009 @ 03:29pm · 0 Comments |