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=D My Journal...NO, IT'S MINE!!!
Just my rubbish that you love to read.
Dear Tommy...
Dear Tommy,

I'm so sorry I dragged you into all this. I'm so sorry all this happened. And, most importantly, I'm sorry that we met. I wasn't quite hoping for your 'rents to find out about the whole thing that happened. And yet after all this you're still the one thing on my mind. It's driving my crazy. I can't stand just being friends. I need more than that, more than just friends. But, you 'rents hate me, you're sis probably does too. Can I blame them? No. And since you're 'rents don't want you talking to me, I guess I won't get more than friends. So instead, I need to completely rid myself of you. And, I never wanted to break up. I didn't plan for it to happen quite the way it did. But, one way or the other, you had to know. It wasn't right, and it still isn't because you're still on my mind. I'm probably the worse thing that's ever happened to you, and so... Maybe it is best if we don't talk to each other. But, the most sad thing about this is, probably no matter how much I don't talk to you, you'll still probably be on my mind. Life's cruel. I hope you're ready for what it's going to throw at you later on. I hope I'll be ready too. And please, you don't need to pray for me. Once my dad find's out, it's only good bye to my laptop, and phone. With a fierce beating towards the end. You're 'rents don't know that they're doing sometimes, no offense. They say they're protecting you...and this time, maybe they really are. And if somehow they read this, oh well... I'm just speaking my thoughts. Ash is going to hate me for all of this... She wanted us to still be friends rather than nothing, but I'm just too selfish -_-;. All you wanted was for me to be happy, eh? Well, not talking won't make me happy. And being just friends won't make me happy. But it's one or the other, and I chose already...no turning back. Guh, and last night I dreamed of you x_x. After this, I might right in a journal of all the fun time's we've had together, just to be reminded of a person that highlighted my life. You know, the truth does hurt once it's said. Whether it's a good truth or bad truth, it still hurts. And the truth that hurts the most is, I love you. Yet I'm making a horrible choice not to talk to you... But that's what I get and deserve in the end, a vanished friend. One last smile for you though...
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P.S. Little tid bits of chat are always okay... But not yet. (I feel like I'm obsessing D; )

Alys_Pickles
Community Member
  • [07/06/13 04:45am]
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  • [02/20/07 03:01am]




  • User Comments: [3]
    [Xen]
    Community Member





    Sat Sep 30, 2006 @ 07:47am


    ALYSSA! No! gonk Don't leave me!!! crying crying crying
    I still love you
    I can change my parents
    Jus please, don't do this to me, I still want to talk to you
    And if you don't come back on for a while, I'm calling
    and if you don't pick up, something is going to drive me completely insane, and I'll come over there with you. ='/ It feels like the world is against us, huh Darling? *sniff* I haven't called u that in a while cry heart


    Alys_Pickles
    Community Member





    Sun Oct 01, 2006 @ 01:27am


    But the sad thing is, is it is against us. Your 'rents, several 30 of your friends probably. And the fact that some of them I know now know my age, and probably hate me even more now =_=;;

    Your 'rents wouldn't change for the world, Tommy. You know that, I know that, danny, and all your other friends know that too.


    [Xen]
    Community Member





    Sun Oct 01, 2006 @ 02:04am


    >=/ they'd eventually understand over time.
    Alyssa, you're the only thing that makes me happy anymore. When u left me, u left with my heart. I haven't been able to find anybody that could possibly replace you, probably because there is nobody that ever could. You're still my everything, and I feel like I'm never going to get over you. As soon as i "temporarily" forget about you, another thing happens and you pop back into my head like an explosion. No matter how hard i try, I'm never going to forget about you. And if it turns out that we never get back together, and when u start making that journal about the good times we had together, please, jus please promise me you'll send it to be someday, or at least a copy if it.
    I still have my webcam, idk wut to do with it, its only taking up space...
    I have too many memories about you that i still haven't deleted, because its jus so much to be throwing away. I'm not sure whether i want to...
    And your letters, i still have them too, along with the pictures...
    Gawd, why are we doing this to each other? I still love you, idc if all the people in the entire damned earth didn't want us to be together, I'm still gonna go for you...
    crying heart


    User Comments: [3]
     
     
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