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okay so I upset Lord Craft because he wasn't in the profile with Toran. So next one up will have him and Hikki in it all by themselves.

I added them to this recent one too but I know he's going to say I just did that because he said something.. and yes it's because of that reason.

It just seems like whatever I do I can never make Lord Craft pleased. I can't die either cause that would piss him off too.

There is just no winning either way I turn. stare

I just don't know what to do to make him not hate me so much.

When I see him I bow out of respect. I never forget to buy him something when I go out on a trip and bring others gifts. I don't hassle him and when I did go visit in the past he just blew me off. I'm not the kind of person that goes and visits someone that doesn't want me there. Like with Kitarro, whenever I seen him I got a "what do you want? I don't want nothing to do with you!"

So I don't bother! It's bad enough that I have so many others that hate me but knowing the main people tell me something like that it just.... well I can't handle it.

I try so hard to not let stuff like that depress me and yes I do get very ******** depressed but I don't show it.

Sure Anna is fine even though she doesn't have a mate.
Sure Anna is okay with the fact that she's been heart broken by the man she's been in love with for over a year.
Sure Anna doesn't want to drink herself to death like before.
Sure Anna is okay with the way Ridge treats her like she's a disease now.
Sure Anna is okay with the thought she might not ever marry and have kids again.

,......well you know what?

I'm not okay... stressed
I'm not fine! I'm just dealing with this hell on Earth. neutral
I watch/ hear everyone else getting in a relationship or married and having such beautiful children. Sometimes I just can't stand it. sad

Sometimes I feel so alone. cry
I wish I had never been born. gonk
I don't even need to die because I'm already living hell. crying

I hate you father for making me happen.
I hate you so much!!!!! scream gonk crying