I so want to die right now. It seems that everytime I want to do something, someone makes me feel like an idiot; a total dumbass as a matter of fact, for even thinking of doing it. So then I go do it, and I hate it the entire time, because I feel stupid for doing it. Then I feel stupid the rest of the day. Mother decided to take her anger out on me today and made me feel like an a** just for going to a restaurant. I even spent my own money there; not hers. Then I just felt like a loser all day. I finally went home and collapsed on my bed and just layed there. I couldn't really do much else. My entire body felt heavy, too heavy. My hands and feet seemed like they weighed two-hundred pounds each. I was really tired for no reason at all. Stacy was there, and I'm sure I bored her to death. I would have done something, but I just couldn't move. Lol, she finally sat next to me and started poking me and doing all this random stuff to cheer me up a bit. Now she's gone, and I'm feeling that weight coming back. I should just go to bed, but I don't want to. I don't really see the point... I wish my dearest Jeff would come and take me away. I'm sure people think it's stupid that I'd feel bad just because my mom was a b***h to me. I just can't help it. So don't even ask me, "Why did you let your mom get to you?", or any variation of that question. I honestly couldn't tell you why. I don't know. Maybe I should just die.
Ugh... Work tomorrow. Someone shoot me.
See you space cowboy.
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