I LOVE Rob Thurman. She's the author of my favorite books. Nightlife. Moonshine. And coming out next year, Madhouse. She is HILARIOUS. I implore you all to go read Nightlife, the first book. Then Moonshine. After that, you'll be as obsessed as me.
Anyway, I'm looking at Rob Thurman's livejournal, and she posted these lists of the characters in her books. So funny. You probably won't get it unless you read her books. But oh well, that's why you should read her books. So there.
Cal's list of reasons not to brood and/or kill self:
1. Find out where Robin gets all the Prozac he keeps sprinkling in my morning cereal
2. Write to Dr. Phil and find out if they take moody, genetic freak monster half breeds with mommy issues on the show...and if so, does it pay anything?
3. Decide once and all between boxers and briefs
4. Ask Delilah to please let you wear underwear again as its beginning to chafe.
5. Keep dosing Niko's soy milk with pure cane sugar and ground coffee. It seems to make him less homicidal
6. When Robin knocks at the door and says Orgy-to-Go, believe him and lock the door. Then climb out the window, down the fire escape and run for your life.
7. Figure out how I can be Greek, Rom, and Auphe and still can't understand a single cab driver in this city.
8. Find out if Goodfellow perms or that's natural, because if that's a perm...s**t he's got a good stylist.
9. Would I look more brooding with a streak of silver in my hair ? (note to self: ask Robin's stylist)
10. Get some sort of pepper spray to keep the goth/emo kids from following me down the street 24/7. It's starting to freak me out.
11. Get Niko to stop calling my underwear underoos when it's his turn to do the laundry.
12. Start cleaning old food out of the refrigerator before the mold gets a chokehold on you (like last time.)
13. Never ask your brother's vampire girlfriend if she's glad to see you or that's just an overbite.
14. Never leave explosive rounds on top of the stove while cooking a pizza...
15. s**t!
Niko's List of Daily Mantras
1. Do not kill Cal
2. Do not kill Cal humanely
3. Do not kill Cal inhumanely
4. Do not kill Cal for writing Super Sexy Boogeyman Slayer on your carrying case for class
5. Find out where this new brand of soymilk comes from. It's quite flavorful.
6. Stop doing Cal's underwear on laundry day. The wolf fur is clogging up the dryer
7. Do not, repeat, do not ask Cal why he has a box of silver tinted hair dye under the sink in the bathroom
8. Tell Dr. Phil to stop calling
9. Tell Cal to please start wearing underwear again as he is becoming increasingly bowlegged.
10. Find out why Goodfellow smells like a perm.
11. Also find out why Cal is so frequently running down the street chased by teenagers dressed all in black.
12. Remind Cal not to leave his explosive rounds on the stove. It is ridiculously dangerous and...
13. s**t
Robin's List of Daily Affirmations, Dreary Chores, and Incredibly Witty Observations
1. I look amazing today. I mean, yes, I always look amazing, but I'm especially devastatingly gorgeous today. Good for me.
2. Remind annoyingly dull cleaning service that the footprints on my headboard and the ceiling over my bed aren't going to wipe themselves off, now are they?
3. Call Hippocrates and ask will Weed-B-Gone cure a meadow nymph STD or do more harm than good.
4. Make up mind as to whether to find out why both Leandros brothers are sniffing your hair suspiciously or just enjoy the process
5. Ask Niko where I can get a brief case marked Super Sexy Boogeyman Slayer too.
6. I mean, honestly, I just look *damn* amazing today.
7. Pay the next installment to goth/emo kids to continue chasing Cal down the street.
8. Decide whether best description for my a** is rock hard or sculpted in marble. Decisions. Decisions.
9. Block Paris Hilton's phone number. b***h...please.
10. Seriously, could I actually look more amazing? Even in an alternate dimension? I think not.
11. Contact lawyer and find out why I'm not on a book cover yet.
12. Steal a pair of Niko's underwear while he deals with exploding kitchen.
13. Rom are smart. Greek are smart. Auphe are smart. What happened with Cal?
14. Did I mention how absolutely amazing I look today?
Rob Thurman rocks so hard she caused an earthquake on Mars. domokun
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