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Why have I come here? I seem to have become distant from my responsibilities and obligations for what I am since my injuries. Sitting alone in my home and avoiding strenuous activity has kept me from destroying my body thus far, but the void inside where the soreness of activity should be has left me feeling empty. That doesn't describe why I'm here, but it shows how I'm here now and how often. Online atmospheres really aren't a substitute to studying, bleeding, and sweating with your compatriots at all; however it does pass the time when you're healing. This is why I'm here.

I should be just about ready to return fully to the dojo with a full ability to participate in the entireties of each class for the days of the week. I haven't built my body to par as of yet, and joining two classes consecutively told me that Wednesday. I can't press my way off the floor to the hundred standard like I was, and should, be able during taiso, and I'm losing breath like I haven't lost it in years. It has been a cause to pity myself and my abilities for the rank I represent, however it hasn't given me the mind to quit. During my strained return I felt the pains of physical training, and despite my knees, it felt nice to hurt from my doing and not my bones.

Being there, I learned that I wasn't the only higher rank that hasn't shown up. Joe, Anna, Joel and Louis--none of them have been seen for a month. Is it the season, did it become too cold too quickly as my excuse had been? Are they losing the interest and faith in the martial arts? Joel and Joe have been busy either working over time or dying from the inside as an angry midget attempts to claw its way out of the latter's gut. Anna would have received her first fighting award for her full contact match if she had shown up, and at almost two years of experience she's beaten me there. I would have, provided I took care of myself, would have grown in rank, fought more kumite, and generally had a happier attitude at life if I were able to attend regular class again. I hope my comrades turn up as I am attempting to, because I don't want to be alone as the highest rank in the room...

My knees have been, aside from painful, feeling generally better. I haven't been able to work at my flexibility with them as of yet, but I expect to within the next couple weeks. Right now though, the tug of my lateral muscles is pulling my patella too far off center to pull my legs that far from the every day motion. I'm still strengthening the medial muscles and doing my outer leg stretches as my rehab instructed me, but patience has always been wearing thin with this ailment, and the constant attention every day is simply a chore--even when I want to continue more than I want to wake up the next day...

That sums up the situation and my introduction well enough, so I'll drop it here for the night.