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"What, is?"
"The Inevitable."
"I see."
Indeed, the inevitable change in direction is comming. Lets face it, you can't be on an emotional plateau forever. Strap yourself in--this ride goes every which way. What ride? Heh. The ride of life, my friends. The ride of life. So, by talking about it is going to make it happen faster, right? Well, hopefully by talking about it I can maintain balance. I can feel it coming...because I start thinking about it- positive/negative; light/dark, high/low...etc.
School's out, and i'm catching up on movies. You wouldn't believe how many people are like "OMG! You didn't see that? I thought you lived in an apartment, not under a rock!" Anyway, I saw Clerks, which lead me to Clerks II, and THAT lead me to "Chasing Amy"...and "There's something about Mary". Now, never mind all my macho bullshit, I like girly movies. Well, maybe they aren't girly in the same sense as "The Notebook", more like..."Multiplicity", the whole comedy/romance is totally up my alley. Forget the mushy kissing and sex scenes, i'm all about how the people, interact and communicate. I don't know, maybe i'm looking for pointers? Quick wit, a good memory...those are the tools you need. Bring up something from the beginning of the movie...the beginning of the relationship, and toss it right in there at the end. Most of the time you see it coming, but it's still about the delivery...the passion.
Ultimately, at the end of a movie or a book, I have to reap some sort of application from it. One thing I have picked up is how characters who haven't saved themselves for marriage are ridiculed (the christian/catholic kid from Clerks); or how it's a total non-issue in the relationship. I just...I dunno, it goes against what I belive personally. This is something i've had on a back burner for awhile...stewing on it...trying to come up with a better solution. Maybe I don't need a solution? Maybe it's just how I want it right now. More on that in a sec.
Another thing i've found is just how absolutely absurd some things in religion are. It's not because i'm watching movies that are spun against it (at least partially), it's that the jokes and comments aren't all that far from the truth. It's a good snapshot of our world and just how seriously more and more people in general take religion. Anyway, just a bit of a thought.
One common theme i've found again and again, across Kevin's Smith's work is the concept of "getting me". People that understand each other...people that realize that there's more to someone than you see. I know, it's corny, and EVERYONE says it at some point, but people have layers. Even the most shallow person you can think of has layers. What do I mean? Well...if I took myself at face value, a 20 year-old smoker who's only now working on his Associates, single, gamer, likes pokemon, fat, kinda mopey, and conflicted. What do you do with tht horseshit? you throw it out the goddamn window, you know? So I get angry, so I throw fits for no reason. This is where the layers come in-- all is takes is a simple, caring, understanding...and empathetic question "Why is he like this?" People build and create relationships out of partially, curioustity...and comfort. I can thnk of a few people that there was no way in hell we should be friends, taking them be thier face value...but you begin to wonder what their story is. Who are they? How do they deal with things? Other people face the same types of problems as anyone else, and they all handle them differently. Me? I go off the deep end. For others, it bounces right off them...and yet others don't even notice it ever happened, at least you'd think that because they don't remember half of it.
So, forget everyone else for right now. first, you have to be able to deal with yourself. If drinking your problems away makes sense to yuo, then by all means. If denying and running from an incident is how you deal, then by all means. If you make a rash decision in the moment, by all means. Realize that your whole life can shift depending on your words and actions. Your own actions. Your own words. So who's got the right to dictate to you how it should be? People can tell you crap until they're blue in the face, and you'll never know just how true what they say is until you got out and find out for yourself. So, this is what i've learned, and it's brought me some comfort. I've done things i'm not proud of. I've done stupid things, some I regret, some I don't feel the need to regret or apologize. I've done some pretty good stuff too, and i've done it for me. To be as corny as possible, "I'm high on life!"
 Twilamare Neter · Mon Jul 21, 2008 @ 01:34am · 1 Comments |
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