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I ******** up.....

I got bored one day and was looking through friends and friends and friends just seeing if anyone played WoW. I found a few people. One I wish I didn't.... I messaged her, not knowing who she was. She was on the same server that I play{ed. Computer died. crying } I thought I could get new friends... It wasn't until she said his name that I realized that she is one of Remmy's exs..... I freaked out and played it off as if I didn't know either of them. {She doesn't know who I am, I pretended not to know who they were} I asked her a question {I forget what it is...} She said that he was the one in her picture, kissing. The girlfriend in me remembered that he said she was a crazy ex who kept that picture up.... the other side of me freaked out.

I found out that he plays WoW all the time with her and that kind of freaked me out.... The girl side of me, y'know.

Deep down, I am a very jealous girl due to my first relationship where the guy broke up with me for one of my close friends....Ever since then I've feared it. I mean, I love the guy dearly and with all of my heart but I'm a jealous girl... I couldn't help it....

This morning I went through a mental breakdown freaking out about that and the fact that my mom was bitching me out and the fact I felt like s**t all night to the point where I was curled up in a ball in the corner. Little did I know, that's where I would be housing the rest of the day. I told everyone I would BRB because of mental breakdown.... HE was the only one who asked what's wrong. I told him....


Everything....


God, I wish I had never found her through a friend's friend's friend's friend...... I seriously feel like s**t right now. I don't want it to be over like that....

I asked him to text me if he needed me. Hour and a half later, nothing yet. I understand that... I'm just going to stay invisible on all my messengers. I don't want many people talking to me....

Ever had one of those times where you wish you could go back in time? I wanna go back about a week. crying

What's done is done... and now I shall return to my corner and just sit there for a few hours. If I isolate myself for a bit, I'm sure I would calm down {IE stop crying.} I will still be sad though....

"I'll be yours forever 'cause I never wanna be without love."