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I've been thinking alot lately. What is my purpose. When I think I usually feel blank inside. I feel so empty, even though I have people who care. There was a short period of time that my life felt full, but I do not want to go into detail just yet. I noticed I spend alot of time online looking for a purpose, a place I belong. It seems that the internet does not have that place I desire. I used to play Runescape alot. Hoping to get powerful, by doing that I would be respected. Then I started to feel even that was pointless. So I came to Gaia to see what I could do to help fill that void. I started to make money and felt okay for a day or two. Then I would say, "Only 2000 more gold and I can get this item." Then I thought to myself. "Then what?" I feel as though its really pointless. I will just spiral into wanting another item. The cycle will repeat itself over and over. Eventually just wasting away possibly a few years of my life. I am a heavy and avid Roleplayer. I usually use that to get away from it all. Its not real, So why do I work on it so much. I did realize something though, through typing this entry I feel slightly better. This is why I want to be a script writer. Thats why I want to make an Anime Series. I feel like its something to work for, still this is not enough to sustain me. I need something more. I am lost in my life's purpose. The most concerning part is, I do not know what I really want. I feel there is someting wrong with me. That is all I will write for now, farewell.