Once again, bored. It sucks though...
I wont be able to get on tomorrow.
**Parents' rule**
And yet my mother is off for another work. ((she had sergery two weeks ago))
So, she goes back to work the same day I go back to school. Pretty late going huh?
But I hear that the schools are going to make the students come to school earlier, and leave later. Then there's a rumor about uniforms.
More crap to go through.
But then again, I wouldn't mind having uniforms.
Since my family can never really afford anymore new clothes, due to the two loans we have. ((thank you a lot Ralph and Liz, you two were a real help in our lives... Not.))
Damn a**-holes.
Heh, my mom and step-dad always ask how I'm thinking about them.
My reply: "They're not family anymore, after what they did."
And sometimes I just want to say:
"I hope they die, since I know that I wont really care and that it be a good riddence of their presences'."
But knowinly, my mother will say:
"No, don't say that, you should wish for someone's death."
But, so far, I hadn't said anything like that.
And yet, for those days that I still lived with them, we talked about them everyday...
Guess what that ended up doing to me. On top of, have to re-pack everything, homework, yelling, and tension?
I had a mental break down once in my room, then one at wendy's...
Stupid? I know....
But now that we're living away from those ********, we talk about them every so often.
I get hear Liz's smart remarks.
Ya' know, I hope my mom quits from her job...
And get one with my step-dad. That way, she doesn't have to hear from them, or see them.
That way, all connection is cut, forever. No more communication!
Even if one of them is on their deathbed, I'll refuse to go.
In fact, I'd rather stay home and read for all I care.
I'm usually not the type to hold grudges... But, when it's family, you do NOT do what they did.
Same with my first Step-dad.
I found out one day that my mom wanted to kill him.
Just one day that he was outside smoking his joint, she'd take my brother's metal bat and beat him until he was dead then drag him into the woods and burry him.
It's true, she told my brother and I that while we were waiting for my Step-dad to come home so we could go pay for a loan then go somewhere... I forgot where though...
I didn't blame he either.
He had an affair.
And he always yelled at her, accusing her of sleeping with another man though she wasn't.
He was always the one to blame.
And one day, I hope he gets to die a slow, and painful death that would make him wish that he was never born.
Yet, once again. I shouldn't wish stuff like that, but I can't help it.
He's just someone that I would hate for the rest of my life until I die.
Whenever that is.
It litterally took me a long time to heal the wounds that he had placed in me mentally.
I always held inside, so my family took me as a: "Happy go lucky kid"
That's another reason why no one ever really sees me cry.
Crying reminds me of those days.
In fact!
I made up at song when I lived with him. (on the piano)
And I would always cry when I played it.
Now, I still remember it, and I play it time to time, but it's better than what I came up with at the age of ten.
But now, I have to go, so. Until next time. Bye. ^^
I wont be able to get on tomorrow.
**Parents' rule**
And yet my mother is off for another work. ((she had sergery two weeks ago))
So, she goes back to work the same day I go back to school. Pretty late going huh?
But I hear that the schools are going to make the students come to school earlier, and leave later. Then there's a rumor about uniforms.
More crap to go through.
But then again, I wouldn't mind having uniforms.
Since my family can never really afford anymore new clothes, due to the two loans we have. ((thank you a lot Ralph and Liz, you two were a real help in our lives... Not.))
Damn a**-holes.
Heh, my mom and step-dad always ask how I'm thinking about them.
My reply: "They're not family anymore, after what they did."
And sometimes I just want to say:
"I hope they die, since I know that I wont really care and that it be a good riddence of their presences'."
But knowinly, my mother will say:
"No, don't say that, you should wish for someone's death."
But, so far, I hadn't said anything like that.
And yet, for those days that I still lived with them, we talked about them everyday...
Guess what that ended up doing to me. On top of, have to re-pack everything, homework, yelling, and tension?
I had a mental break down once in my room, then one at wendy's...
Stupid? I know....
But now that we're living away from those ********, we talk about them every so often.
I get hear Liz's smart remarks.
Ya' know, I hope my mom quits from her job...
And get one with my step-dad. That way, she doesn't have to hear from them, or see them.
That way, all connection is cut, forever. No more communication!
Even if one of them is on their deathbed, I'll refuse to go.
In fact, I'd rather stay home and read for all I care.
I'm usually not the type to hold grudges... But, when it's family, you do NOT do what they did.
Same with my first Step-dad.
I found out one day that my mom wanted to kill him.
Just one day that he was outside smoking his joint, she'd take my brother's metal bat and beat him until he was dead then drag him into the woods and burry him.
It's true, she told my brother and I that while we were waiting for my Step-dad to come home so we could go pay for a loan then go somewhere... I forgot where though...
I didn't blame he either.
He had an affair.
And he always yelled at her, accusing her of sleeping with another man though she wasn't.
He was always the one to blame.
And one day, I hope he gets to die a slow, and painful death that would make him wish that he was never born.
Yet, once again. I shouldn't wish stuff like that, but I can't help it.
He's just someone that I would hate for the rest of my life until I die.
Whenever that is.
It litterally took me a long time to heal the wounds that he had placed in me mentally.
I always held inside, so my family took me as a: "Happy go lucky kid"
That's another reason why no one ever really sees me cry.
Crying reminds me of those days.
In fact!
I made up at song when I lived with him. (on the piano)
And I would always cry when I played it.
Now, I still remember it, and I play it time to time, but it's better than what I came up with at the age of ten.
But now, I have to go, so. Until next time. Bye. ^^
Community Member