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Crush by David Archuleta

"I hung up the phone tonight
Something happened for the first time deep inside
It was a rush, what a rush

'Cause the possibility
That you would ever feel the same way about me
It's just too much, just too much

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Has it ever crossed your mind
When we're hanging, spending time girl, are we just friends?
Is there more, is there more?

See it's a chance we've gotta take
'Cause I believe that we can make this into something that will last
Last forever, forever

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy

Why do I keep running from the truth?
All I ever think about is you
You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized
And I've just got to know

Do you ever think when you're all alone
All that we can be, where this thing can go?
Am I crazy or falling in love?
Is it real or just another crush?

Do you catch a breath when I look at you?
Are you holding back like the way I do?
'Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away
But I know this crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
This crush ain't goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy
Goin' away-ay-ay-ay-ayy"

Even though this is a song by a guy... it's the same feeling I have for this one guy but I know he likes me back... but he has someone else. I've been listening to this song all day and now I'm wondering... will it always be like this? I'm desperate to have him be mine... to be his girl... I try so hard... too hard.. and I don't make any progress... I want to move on but I can't. All I think about is him and I can't stand it. He can go out with other girls so easily while I can't like another guy without thinking about him... and it hurts to know he's with someone other than me. I love him... more than he knows.... more than another knows... more than I knew I did 2 years ago. He's the one I wanna be with... I love him more than I express. If I could do anything to make him happy I totally would be theres many miles between us. Thinking about this makes me wanna cry so much blood is put in its place. I'm crying right now and I can't stop... thinking of the past.. the present.. and what will happen in the future.. I can't take this pain. I'm not strong enough... for anything... I'm a weakling!! SOMEONE COME AND KILL ME NOW!!!