Chapter Six
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Sasuke just asked me to marry him.
Uchiha Sasuke just asked me to marry him.
Oh.God.Oh.God.Oh.God.Oh.God.Oh.God.Oh.God.Oh.God.
It was like my favorite childhood fantasy come true, except it wasn’t exactly how I’d pictured it. In my dreams, we were always off vacationing somewhere romantic and Sasuke would present a ring- there was always a ring- and he would tell me he loved me before asking for the honor of calling me his wife…or something incredibly cheesy like that.
Well reality was very sobering.
There was no ring, no declaration of love and no exotic location.
He wanted me though, that much I was sure of and the knowledge of it warmed me down to my toes. But of course I wasn’t going to say yes. Sasuke and I are like oil and water, complete opposites- almost incompatible, in fact. Sometimes I hate him more than I love him, and at others my heart feels like it’s about to burst with all the emotions he inspires.
That isn’t enough though.
Not if we want to settle down.
Our relationship is too volatile: we fight, we argue, we make up, we break up, we get back together. It’s an endless cycle and one that’s impossible to break because Sasuke never opens up about anything. His thoughts are his own, and he doesn’t share them with anyone. How can I agree to share the rest of my life with a man who won’t share his feelings with me?
I can’t do it.
Loving him wouldn’t be enough.
My thoughts were disrupted by a high-pitched scream.
Sitting up again, I listened hard. I could hear the murmur of voices but nothing else. Tossing the sheets aside, I got out of bed and slipped into a silk wrapper. Running my fingers through my tousled hair (just in case it was someone important was at the door), I left the room.
The scene that I walked in upon a few seconds later was one that had my heart pummel down into my stomach, leaving me almost breathless with surprise.
Sitting in the living room wearing stony expressions, were both of my parents.
Sasuke had just finished shutting the front door, and turned when he heard my footsteps in the hallway.
I couldn’t breathe.
I wanted to say something, but the words just weren’t there.
Luckily, my father had plenty to say: “Uchiha, would you mind leaving me and my wife alone with our daughter?”
The hostility in his voice was clear as day.
Unfortunately, Sasuke wasn’t easy to bully. He was standing across from my parents, still unabashedly in his boxers, with his arms folded across his chest. The dark glimmer in his eyes was one I recognized well: it was the same look he wore whenever his gunpowder temper had been set off.
His response was blunt, brief: “No.”
I had to do some damage control; another second and they’d be at each other’s throats. Crossing over to Sasuke as fast as I could, I grabbed him by the arm. “Sasuke please-.”
He turned to scowl down at me. “I’m not going anywhere.”
He was being stubborn- stupid and stubborn.
This was definitely not the way to win my parents over.
“Please,” I repeated, looking him directly in the eye.
“You really want me to leave?” he asked, his tone one of deceptive calm.
My father cut in, furiously: “That’s exactly what she wants!”
I twirled around: “Dad! Just stay out of this!”
My father was about to say something else, when my mother reached out and gripped his hand. Glancing over at her, he frowned but swallowed back his words, his mouth setting into a grim line of disapproval.
Turning back to Sasuke, I said: “I’m sorry. I’ll call you when this is all over.”
He looked down at me, a strange expression on his face, before saying: “Don’t bother.”
Then he walked out of the room.
When he came back a few minutes later, dressed in the dark denim jeans and black polo shirt he was wearing earlier, he didn’t stop to kiss me goodbye or anything. I hurried after him, but the front door was slammed in my face on his way out.
The message was clear: don’t follow me.
I tried to hold it back.
Honestly I did.
But I couldn’t.
The tears welled up, and before I knew it I was crying like a baby.
--
A steaming cup of tea was placed on the marble countertop before me.
“Drink it. You’ll feel better.”
My mother’s voice was soft and soothing. It reminded me of being a kid again and running to her for comfort.
Lifting the cup with slightly trembling hands, I took a sip and then put the it back down. It was too hot to drink right away, so I decided to let it cool.
“I hate dad,” I whispered quietly.
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do,” I insisted, turning to look at her. “He’s always against me.”
Unbidden, the tears of frustration started to my eyes again.
“He’s not against you. He’s just a little disappointed in you right now, like I am.”
We were sitting alone in the kitchen together because my father had decided to go for a walk to calm himself.
I was glad he’d gone out.
It was hard to feel anything but angry when he was around.
I sighed. “Why can’t both of you just be happy for me? Is that too much to ask for?”
“Sakura, you’re my daughter- of course I want to be happy for you.”
“But?” I asked.
“But,” she continued, “this guy isn’t good for you. He’s broken your heart so many times and I just don’t want to see that happen again-.”
“I love him.” I said, concentrating on the way the steam rose from the cup and curled into the air in hopes of holding back the onslaught of tears that were threatening to fall. “I always have and I always will. It doesn’t matter what he does. There’s no logic behind loving someone.”
“Does he love you?”
I bit my lower lip. “I-I don’t know.”
“After all these years you still don’t know?”
“He’s very reserved,” I replied, feeling a little defensive.
I looked at my mother. She was sitting there with her eyes closed, hands folded in her lap. Today she wore a red sweater and a pair of black pants, her pale pink hair swept back neatly from her high forehead. People said we looked like sisters, and usually that made me feel proud because I wanted to be like her: a brilliant doctor, a patient wife, and a kind and caring mother.
I didn’t feel very proud now though.
She was disappointed in me; I could see it in the way the corners of her mouth tipped downwards in a frown, and I could read it in her silence. It seemed like an eternity passed before she spoke, and when she did her voice was low and hoarse, almost as though she were struggling to keep her emotions in check. “Sakura, what do you know about his background?”
A little caught off guard by the question, I asked: “What do you mean?”
“Does he ever tell you about his past? About why he’s estranged from his parents? Do you two ever talk?”
I swallowed, suddenly feeling panicky. “N-no. I mean yes, we talk sometimes but no he hasn’t told me about his family problems.” Realizing that she’d only ever seen the bad sides of Sasuke, I continued on: “But he asked me to marry him today, so I know he cares. He’s just not very talkative-.”
This revelation, instead of helping my argument, seemed to do the exact opposite because my mother scoffed and stood up. “Oh Sakura, you’re such a child. Do you know who his family is? His father is perhaps the richest man in this country, and his clan amongst the most renown. Do you really believe they’d welcome you? Do you think you’d be accepted? I love you, I’m you’re mother so I have to say it: you’re setting yourself up for heartbreak. You have no future with this man.”
Her words were spoken in a soft, apologetic tone- as if she was trying to break it to me gently.
I didn’t want to hear it though.
Leaving Sasuke just wasn’t an option, whatever the future held.
He was essential to me so everything else was irrelevant.
Why couldn’t everyone just understand?
Suddenly, I couldn’t stand to listen to anymore. “Enough. You’re acting as though you know him, when clearly you don’t. You’ve never given him a chance! Besides, you’re my mother! Do you think his family’s wealth or power matters to me? Do you think it makes him better than me somehow? Not that any of this has anything to do with Sasuke; he hates his family!”
My little outburst didn’t go down so well with my mother.
Her hands clenched into fists at her side, and her brows furrowed. “What,” she began in a low, trembling voice, “do you know of his relationship with his family, Sakura? What do you know at all? He never tells you anything! The only thing the two of you ever do is go at it like, like- like rabbits.”
If the situation hadn’t been so serious, I probably would have laughed at her analogy but nothing felt funny to me. Not right then. How could I laugh or smile when she’d just voiced all the fears I’d ever had about my relationship with Sasuke?
I hated the way she made it sound.
Now it felt like all the special things I’d shared with him were cheap, vulgar and base. She made it sound like he didn’t love me, like I was a stupid lovesick teenager to think he ever had. Now more so than ever, our relationship seemed impossible.
But if I had thought I was thrown by any of the things that were said so far, her next words trumped them all.
“I’m giving you an ultimate. You have to choose. It’s either him, or your family.”
Her voice was cold, businesslike.
She probably thought she was disciplining me- teaching me right from wrong like she had when I was a child.
She couldn’t see that I’d grown.
She couldn’t see anything besides the little girl she’d raised.
She also couldn’t see that that my mind was already made up.
I wasn’t a little girl anymore, and I was fully capable of making my own mistakes.
I chose him.
I chose Sasuke.
--
He hasn’t called.
It’s been a week and he hasn’t called.
I tried to contact him myself but his phone was switched off.
Clearly he doesn’t want to speak to me.
Or see me either.
I would be upset, but this behavior is so unlike him that I don’t know what to think. We’ve had worse fights in the past but he’s never shut me out like this. He’s never purposely distanced himself from me: when we argue, I’m the one who runs and tries to ignore the existence of the problem. He’s always been the confrontational one.
I just don’t understand.
“Are you okay?” Ino asked, placing a comforting arm around my shoulders.
We were sitting together in the waiting room at the hospital, right outside the gynecologist’s office. I nodded, forcing myself to smile at her: “I’m fine.”
“You look tired. Do you want me to get you a cup of coffee? Some hot tea maybe?”
I shook my head. “I really don’t feel like drinking anything.”
“Okay.” She still looked a bit uncertain though, and then she sighed: “Promise you won’t get too mad at me if I say something?”
I glanced over at her. Her blue eyes were full of sympathy and was that- apology? Suddenly I felt extremely grateful to the blonde beside me; she wasn’t perfect but she was the most loyal friend I had. I was grateful to her for coming with me. There was no way I could have braved this visit alone, especially the announcement of the results.
“I could never be mad at you,” I said with a genuine smile this time. “Not after today.”
“Wait until you hear what I’ve got to say first,” she chastised playfully. “It’s about Sasuke, and you’re always defensive when it comes to him so be prepared.”
My smile faltered. “I guess my parents were right; I do put him up on a pedestal don’t I?”
Ino shook her head. “No, Sakura- not exactly. You know he’s no angel, you know he can be absolutely heartless but it doesn’t matter to you. That’s the problem. You let him get away with things all the time, and I really think you need to stand up for yourself once in a while. I bet if he waltzed back into your life right now you’d welcome him back with open arms, wouldn’t you?”
“That’s a little unfair,” I said, “he’s never done anything like this before. I’m worried about him so of course I’d love to know he’s okay.”
The blonde sighed. “You see? You’re always prepared to make excuses for him. Okay, forget that; what about the other day? You were trying to sort out an issue with your family and he was trying to pick a fight. Instead of being there for you, Sasuke was being a drama queen-.”
I opened my mouth to say something and then shut it again.
I had no logical argument.
Sasuke was a complete a** to me that day.
“And what did you do?” Ino continued, really getting into it now. “You went after him. Sakura you are completely shameless when it comes to this guy. If he’s going to be a jerk about things, you shouldn’t chase after him and apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
I sighed, rubbing my aching temples. “You’re right. You’re right, okay? But you have to understand: there’s a lot of history between the two of us.”
“Exactly.”
I raised an eyebrow at her, a little surprised. “You’re agreeing with me?”
“Sure,” she said with a shrug. “It’s been six years-.”
“Seven.” I corrected her without thinking about it.
Ino rolled her eyes, “Okay, seven and you know, you were in love with him before that too. Honestly I still remember how we used to compete for his attention and how he picked nerdy little you back in eighth grade. I was so jealous because I’d never been turned down before.”
We were both smiling nostalgically at the memory.
“He was reserved then too. When we first started dating he wouldn’t even hold my hand in public. He wanted to be all secretive because he wasn’t used to having only one girlfriend.” I laughed a little. “He was also possessive back then.”
Ino nodded slowly. “God, you two have been with each other for ages.”
I shrugged. “It doesn’t feel like that long. Besides, we were always breaking up and stuff.”
“But that’s my point Sakura,” the blonde said, her tone suddenly becoming more serious. “You’re both so young and you’ve never really been with anyone else. I think- I think you guys should go on a break.”
I sat up fast, shocked that she’d suggest something like that. “A break? Ino, we just got over a ‘break’.”
“No Sakura, that was a breakup and besides neither of you were seeing other people. I really think that’s something you both need to try: it’ll be like experience. Sasuke has never tried to date another girl before- sleep around with yes, but not date. You've never been with anyone else period. Maybe after you’ve been on a break for a while, you’ll learn not to take each other for granted and you’ll stop breaking up so often.”
I listened to her for quietly.
She made a good point.
But there was no way something like that could ever work.
Sasuke was too possessive and I- well, I get jealous easily. I’ve never liked to see him with other girls. Besides, I don’t even know where he is right now. I don’t know if he’s alive, or anything. Almost as if on cue, my cell phone rang. The number displayed on the screen was set to private.
My heart was suddenly in my throat.
I knew it had to be him.
It just had to be.
I answered. “H-hello.”
But the voice on the other end wasn’t Sasuke’s deep baritone. It belonged to another familiar male. “Sakura-chan?”
My grip on the phone tightened. “Naruto? Is that you?”
Ino straightened up beside me, tilting her head so she could listen in.
An indecipherable sound came back.
s**t, there was too much static. I got up and walked around, hoping that would help.
“Hello? Sakura? Are you there?”
It was much clearer now. “Yes, I hear you. Naruto-.”
“Sakura, listen, I don’t have a lot of time but I just wanted to-.”
“Is Sasuke with you?”
“-tell you the teme’s fine. There are a few things going on right now, but he wanted me to call you and tell you not to worry.”
“Where is he? Where are you?”
“I can’t tell you much right now, but don’t worry. Sasuke will call you later. Just don’t worry okay? I have to go now.”
Then the line went dead.
Leaning against the closest wall, I closed my eyes. What the hell was going on? What happened to Sasuke? Why couldn’t he come to the phone?
Within a few seconds, Ino was at my side, asking what happened. Before I could tell her a thing though, my gynecologist had returned, carrying a manila folder in hand. “If you’d come this way, Ms. Haruno, we can look over the results in my office.”
The moment of truth had arrived.
Oh God.
Mo0n-cHan: (Thoughts? As usual I have no idea what I think of this chapter. If you didn’t really get what was going on, don’t worry. It’s meant to be a bit vague, and things will be explained later (including where Sasuke is, and what Sakura is doing at the gynecologist). There wasn’t a lot of Sasuke or fluff in this chapter and it was a bit boring, but things are going uphill from here. Anyway, I’ve decided NOT to put this story on hiatus because of the wonderful amount of reviews I’ve received and also because I’ve finally decided where I want to go with this story. As was promised in the last chapter, I’m going to address everyone who reviewed (in chapter Six):
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