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As some of you may or may not know... My father saves a big coffee can of change for me most every year. He's been doing so sense I was little and, before a few years ago, gave it to my mother for safe keeping. My mother always ended up wasting a lot of my money on her booze and cigarettes. The last two, or maybe three , years my father has given the money directly to me. I hope that with this years money, I can afford one of those small laptops that are being sold on Amazon dot com.

I've had a R.L. girlfriend. We had been going out for roughly three months but hadn't gotten to see each other a lot. I ******** up and we are separated. She says she forgives me.... I guess she possibly does. I just don't forgive myself. I'm still angry with myself. It's just another thing to add to the 'why I hate me' pile.
I've been hearing s**t from several people that Zeek is faking his/her problem to get attention and it ticks me off. I don't like to hear people say s**t about Zeek. Even though we are not together anymore... I still love him/her and like to think the best of her/him. She is special to me and I hate to hear people say s**t about her. I hate it when people say anything bad about people I care for. I hate it. I don't like it when my best friend says crap about Zeek and my now-ex. It makes me so mad but I don't say anything, not really. I glare at her and call her a b***h and tell her to shut up but, like usual, my voice never has enough command. Enough force.


Okay....Amanda is making me go to bed...

Continued!!

I miss my ex.
Anyhow.

The last two weeks I've been starved. My mother has been avoiding being home just in case the police came. She's on parole. Her piss test came back dirty. So she's been staying elsewhere, leaving me alone in our apartment which has, of late, been ill stocked with food. So for a little over a week this is all I ate: Half a bag of corn chips. A handful of stick pretzels. The last edible TV dinner ( the healthier kins. I split it with my kittens 'cause they ran out of food too) about four slices of Kraft singles cheese ( I also split these with my kittens) and about three tablespoons of peanut butter. o-o
All of that in a 7 to 8 day span... I'd stopped really feeling hunger for awhile until Amanda came and took me to her house...

I can't originally remember what I wanted to put in this when I started so I'll just say it's done...
DONE! xP