Have you ever felt that everything around is fake? Like your stuck in a dream of coma and everything is just a figment of your imagination? Well, I feel like that all the time. Nothing ever feels exactly real to me. I've never talked about this to anyone because I'm sure they would consider me crazy and send me to the loony bin, but I feel like explaining how I feel toward whomever decides to read my craptastical journal.
Today is just another day for me. Nothing exciting has happened this summer except that I haven't cut myself since school let out which is pretty good news. I'm away from all of the unessisary drama that led me deeper into that pitful of darkness called depression that I suffer from. My parents don't even know about me being depressed or that I've even started cutting because I'm afraid of what they'd do to me. That would send me to the loony bin once again if I even utter a word about my problems....I tend to just bottle them up and hide behind a smile, but it's starting to not work. All those problems being bottled up eventually have to be let out and when they are let out, I have a complete breakdown out of nowhere. How do you not know your child had depression problems when they just start crying out of nowhere and start avoiding everything.....And when you see huge scabs on their ankles that they simple say were caused by accident while shaving even after seeing how deep and long they are/ Honestly......How they hell do they not put pieaces together and see past everything that I fake? They've known me for years and still can't see that I'm just a broken girl thats ready to shatter in a matter of seconds......
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awsome poems
Song of the day: Suburbs - Junior Achiever
"Youve got the big house, Driving your fancy car, Living on a quiet street, Who do you think you are? Remove yourself from social disease Way out in the suburbs, suburbs."
"Youve got the big house, Driving your fancy car, Living on a quiet street, Who do you think you are? Remove yourself from social disease Way out in the suburbs, suburbs."
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