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AChapter 11
Recovery

Virgil sat quietly inside the bus terminal as he waited for the morning bus route that would take him and Daniel to the nearby hospital. Beside Virgil sat an equally as quiet Daniel. Hunched over and drumming his fingers on his pant leg, Daniel sat watching the scenery intently through the clear glass surrounding the bench at the terminal. His face was taut as if he were thinking about something. Unchanging, it was the same look that greeted Virgil at Daniel’s door when Virgil came by to walk with Daniel to the hospital. After a few minutes of sitting in silence, Virgil, out the corner of his eye, noticed Daniel’s expression change. Daniel’s face had relaxed and turned into a look of pity.
“Hey, Virgil,” Daniel said without taking his eyes off of the object in the distance. He stopped drumming his fingers. “You see that woman across the street with the small rolling bag behind her?”
Virgil looked past the row of parked snow-covered cars in front of him and across the street to see a little old woman slowly walking on the other side of the street rolling a small red bag. Wrapped in a black shawl and wearing a tattered gray coat, Virgil assumed that she was homeless. She walked with a limp and occasionally coughed into her coat as she walked. People passed her unflinching and occasionally gave her a look of disdain. It was a depressing show of a cavalier disregard of a poor person. “Yeah,” he answered absently. “What about her?” He thought this woman had to have some connection to what Daniel was thinking about because he had been silent the whole trip from Daniel’s house to the terminal.
“She’s homeless,” he said with a tinge of pity. “It’s a little sad. Being out in this cold weather without a house must be hard. Not to mention the coldness of the people around her. It's like her whole world is nothing but an endless winter,” His voice had become melancholy and a little worrisome. “I just hope my daughter doesn’t end up like her,” he added after the woman passed from their view.
Virgil continued to focus on the busy world outside of the terminal. He had already forgotten about the woman that he had just seen seconds before. “How do you know you’re going to have a daughter?” He asked as he watched a man and a woman cross the street on the other side of the road. “Your child is barely three months in. I don’t think its possible to tell,”
“I just have a feeling,” His friend said as he looked down at the ground. “Just a feeling,”
Another long silence pursued after that. The wind had picked up and began blowing the delicate blanket of snow that covered the streets and sidewalk. As it danced in the air, it began to shimmer in the light like glitter. Immediately Virgil became hypnotized by this natural beauty. He was so entranced by this display he did not hear the beginning of Daniel’s next comment.
“What?” Virgil said as his focus turned back to Daniel. “I didn’t hear you,”
“I said,” Daniel started to say. “why are we going to the hospital?” He said this much slower so Virgil would pay attention to every word that he said.
“Because we should go see Switch,” Virgil said. “Although I doubt that’s his real name. We owe him thanks for saving out lives,”
“Oh, right,” His friend answered absently. “I just…forgot,”
“I don’t see how,” Virgil said in a perplexed manner. “Why else would we be going to the hospital? Speaking of hospitals,” Virgil said as he jumped to a new subject, “which reminds me of babies, which reminds me of Maria, how was your day shopping yesterday?”
“Boring,” Daniel said with a sigh. “All we did was look around and we didn’t buy anything. We went to…” He started counting on his fingers. “at least five stores,” Daniel shook his head. “I don’t know how they do it Virgil. I got hungry around eleven o’clock. I could barely walk after that,” “Eleven o’clock,” Virgil thought to himself. “I did something way more interesting around eleven o’clock yesterday,” Virgil smiled and laughed slightly. Daniel caught this laugher and turned to Virgil and gave him a confused look. Virgil immediately stopped laughing and looked away.
“What’s so funny?” He asked, his eyebrow raised.
“Nothing,” Virgil said sheepishly. “I was remembering something that happened yesterday. Melissa had come over and—“
“Melissa?” Daniel said. Now both of his eyebrows were raised in interest. He had immediately become interested at the mention of his friend’s name. “What was she doing over there?”
“Talking to me,” Virgil said nonchalantly. “She wasn’t over there long—“
“What did she say?” Daniel interrupted eagerly. “Did she say anything about me?” Virgil figured that Daniel was worried that Melissa would say something about his future plans.
“No,” Virgil said. “We just talked about school. Nothing happened,” Knowing that this was a lie, he couldn’t look Daniel in the eye. Instead, he focused his gaze past Daniel.
“Oh, okay,” Daniel quietly said, his mind now at ease. He resumed looking out at the people across the street. “Wait,” He said. He turned to Virgil. “that doesn’t explain why you were laughing,” “Damn,” Virgil thought. “I forgot about that,”
“She told me a funny joke about one of the teachers,” Virgil lied. “Bad lie,” He thought. “But I think Daniel will buy it,” When Daniel gave him a confused look, Virgil added, “You know, the one about Ms. Wilson,”
Daniel smiled, “Oh right,” Laughing, he added, “Yeah, I remember that one,”

The bus came twenty minutes later and screeched to a halt in front of its stop. Immediately Virgil’s nose was assaulted by the acrid smell of burning diesel fuel. The bus doors swung open and Daniel and Virgil quickly got on. The floor, wet with melted snow and spilled beverages, also was littered with leftover bags of food and cups. There was the occasional cigarette bud, although not as common as the discarded bags. The bus itself had an odd smell: the smell of leather. The passengers on the bus were of all demographics and generations: young and old, tall and stout, black and white. Many of the standing passengers were holding onto the railings overhead. Each wore dull looks, as if they had ridden this same bus their entire lives. Virgil knew those looks all too well: they were the looks of people tired of the routine motions of life.
“We should get a seat somewhere,” Daniel said as he looked around the interior of the bus. Following Daniel as he made his way down the small isle, Virgil managed to get a good look at his fellow passengers. Some were sleeping. Others read the morning paper. The only common ground that each person on the bus shared was his or her personal silence. No one talked as both boys got on the bus except Daniel. Besides coughing and the hum of the bus’s engine, silence reigned.
Pulling Virgil into a seat beside him, Daniel, too, became silent as if he himself were changed by the surrounding silence as well. Virgil, landing in the seat beside Daniel, began surveying his surroundings again. Daniel, on the other hand, remained silent and gazed out the window and watched people zip by as the bus made its way to the hospital. His gazed was fixed on life outside the window of the bus as if he himself wished for a better life outside of his own.
The ride to the hospital took only ten minutes. To Virgil, however, it seemed like hours. The silence and lack of human interaction on the bus made him bored and ultimately tired. After a few minutes Virgil had fallen asleep. When the bus arrived at its stop at the hospital corner, Daniel gently shook Virgil from his slumber and motioned to him to get up. Virgil, like a zombie, automatically made his way off the bus without realizing he had even gotten off. Fortunately, as he got off, a strong gust of cold air blew by, hitting his face and awakening him from his dreamlike trance.
“Where to now, Virgil?” Daniel said as he buttoned his black coat. The wind had made it flap in the wind like a towel on a clothesline. Virgil rubbed his eyes, trying to wake himself faster.
“Around the corner to the entrance of the hospital,” Virgil answered drowsily. When Daniel gave him another confused look and asked was he okay, Virgil replied, “D-don’t mind me Daniel,” Virgil yawned. “I’ll be fine when we get into the hospital, trust me,”
In the hospital, the warmth within immediately had an awakening effect on Virgil. In the lobby, large windows of glass allowed the wintry sun to shine in light, illuminating the room without the need of artificial light. To the left of the sliding doors were waiting chairs where visitors sat waiting to be administered into various parts of the hospital. Some sat reading magazines from the coffee table in front of them. To the right in the lobby were elevators leading up to the next floor. Occasionally opening to discharge its riders, the elevator doors squeaked every time they opened.
Virgil and Daniel made their way to the counter. A young woman with brunette colored hair sat at the desk. Shuffling through papers, she looked up and gave the boys a smile when they approached the desk. As in a usual setting, the woman asked the boys how could she be of assistance. Virgil took charge and answered her question.
“We’re here to visit a friend of ours,” He said.
“Okay,” The woman kindly said as she shuffled through the papers again. Virgil figured she was looking for the list of patients and what room numbers they were in. Minutes passed and the woman continued to look for the list. “New, eh?” Virgil thought to himself. “Not to mention disorganized,” Mumbling to herself, she stopped in mid-shuffle and glanced at the stack of papers beside her. “Ah,” she said with a smile. Looking up, she said sheepishly, “I found the paper,” Virgil gave her a weak smile. “Yep, she’s new,” He thought.
Letting out a triumphant sigh, the woman calmly asked, “So, boys, what is your friend’s name?” Virgil winced. “Damn,” Virgil thought. “I forgot we need a name,” He forgot to ask Switch his name before he was taken away in the ambulance.
“I’m not sure of his first name, but I know his last name is Collins,” Daniel quietly replied.
Virgil looked over at the boy beside him. “How do you know that?” Virgil asked.
“I just do,” His friend answered absently as he watched the woman behind the desk go down the list of names. “I remember them saying his last name before they put him in the ambulance,”
“You never told me that you knew,” Virgil said in amazement. His gaze met the side of Daniel’s head. Daniel had not bothered to look at his friend.
Daniel smiled. “You never asked, Virg,” His voice lowered and his smile receded. “There are a lot of things you never asked about me,”
“Third floor, Room 325,” The woman said. “You should be lucky. We only have one patient named Collins in this whole hospital today. What a lucky break for you two,” She pointed past the elevators to a corridor. “There are stairs leading to the third floor farther down the hall past the elevators. That’s if you want to use them, I mean. You can use the elevators if you like,” She gave them a smile and resumed her work at her desk. As they walked away, the woman added, “By the way, boys, the button for the third floor is a little jammed. You might have to press it a few times before it works, okay?”
Virgil and Daniel turned around. “Thanks, miss,” Daniel said with a half-smile. “I’ll remember to press it then,” As soon as she looked down, Daniel’s smile faded and he resumed making his way to the elevators. “Let’s go,” He said. “Geez she was crazy,” As Virgil silently followed close behind, he thought about what Daniel had said. “There are a lot of things you never asked about me,” The sentence played over in his mind like a scratched record. He didn’t know why it stuck in his mind, but it must have had some importance to him. “What don’t I know?” He thought as the elevator doors squealed as they opened. Daniel stepped in, followed by Virgil. “I know everything about Daniel, don’t I? I know his favorite foods, songs, the girls he likes, the girls he doesn’t like…what could there be?”
“Virgil,” Daniel said as he leaned against the metal railing that went around the whole interior of the small, dimly lit elevator. “Could you press three?” Virgil looked at him and quickly looked away.
“What?” He said turning back to Daniel. “Did you say something?” His mind was still wrapped around the meaning of what Daniel said. It had impaired his other usual thoughts and he for some reason he really wanted to figure out what Daniel meant.
“Press three,” Daniel repeated
“Three?”
“Three,” Daniel repeated for a third time. Virgil, after pressing the third floor button several times, quietly made his way to the opposite corner of the elevator and leaned against the railing. He stood there in silence, occasionally glancing around the dull, whitewashed interior walls of the elevator. As the door squeaked to a close, the old elevator slowly made its ascent to the third floor. As they waited, Virgil noticed that his gaze would sometimes meet Daniel’s own. Daniel, who on the other side of the elevator was also looking around at the interior, usually quickly looked away or stared down at the dingy gray carpet that lined the elevator’s base.
Seconds later the elevator jerked and stopped. Above the door, a number three glowed to let the boys know that they had arrived on the third floor. The elevator doors squeaked open and both Virgil and Daniel’s ears were immediately filled with the bustle of a busy day in a hospital. Doctors sped by as the made their rounds to address their ailing patients. Nurses lounged near the windows as they talked about their patients. Occasionally Virgil would notice the patients themselves making their way around the third floor with their I.V. bags attached to them like an extension of their own body.
The third floor of the hospital was in an unusual layout due to the misplaced elevators. As one would step out, they would catch a glimpse of the city below due to the long stretch of window from one corner of the floor to the other. Beside the elevators was a lobby desk similar to the one on the first floor. Past the desk was a hall that was lined with doors with numbers on them: the patient’s rooms.
“Which number was it again?” Daniel asked as he slowly passed each door. A few were closed. In others one could look in and see patients young and old asleep or watching the television on the wall. As both boys passed each room down the hall, they received a glimpse into the life of the hospitalized patient in that particular room. Many of the rooms that had young children in them were filled with worried relatives bringing large “Get well soon” balloons and stuffed animals to please the ailing child. In many of the rooms with children, as Virgil would notice, the mothers would stand by their child, gently stroking his or her hair and assuring them that they’ll be fine. In other rooms, the elderly rested watching their static-ridden televisions. To Virgil they all seemed asleep. They rarely moved and if they did it would only be to let out a small cough.
“313, 314…,” Daniel counted as he went down the hall. “320, 325. This is it, right Virgil?” Daniel asked. Knocking on the door, Daniel waited for an answer.
“Yeah?” Someone answered from the other side. “You can open the door. It closed after the doctor left, God knows why,” The voice was the sound of an adolescent.
Daniel slowly opened the door. The room was a bit smaller and darker than the other rooms. Unlike the others in which two patients lived and ample light shone through the windows large windows, this room only housed one patient and the curtains were closed. The only light that was given off was the small lamp beside the hospital bed. To one side of the room was the adolescent on a typical hospital bed. He sat looking at his visitors. Putting the remote down that was in his hand, he said, “Oh. It’s you two,”
Daniel frowned. “Yeah it’s us,” He said bitterly. “You gonna say hi or what?” Virgil stepped in behind Daniel to see the teen who had saved their lives. The light from the dim lamp had magnified the sadness that could be seen on Switch’s face. His eyes seemed to sink into his head and his face seemed paler in the weak glow of the lamp.
“No,” He said as he looked back up at the wall-mounted television. “I don’t need to. You should be sayin’ hi to me. I saved your lives, after all,”
“Well, yeah, sure but,” Virgil said as he stepped from behind Daniel. Switch turned his head to Virgil and their eyes met. Switch’s eyes were dark and angry. Looking at them almost froze Virgil in mid-sentence. “it doesn’t matter,” He finished. He decided to not bother with fighting with his savior. “I’m not going to argue,”
“Okay then,” Switch said definitively as he turned back to the television. He quickly flicked through the channels, not even stopping to look at one. “Dumb hospital TV,” he said. “No good channels,”
Walking over to a chair in the corner of the room near the window, Daniel picked up the chair and made his way to the side of Switch’s bed with the lamp.
“What are you doin, man?” Switch said. He scooted to the opposite side of his bed.
“Nothing,” Daniel said. “I just wanna be by my hero,” He gave Switch a sarcastic smile. Turning around to Virgil, Daniel added, “Pull up a seat, Virg, and bask in our hero’s wounded glory,” He laughed a bit and turned around. Leaning towards Switch, Daniel patted him on the shoulder. Switch winced.
“Ah!” Growled Switch. “That’s the side I got shot on man,” He rubbed his arm. “Don’t touch it,”
“Whoops, sorry,” Daniel apologized. “I thought that was your good arm,” As Virgil sat retrieved a chair from under the television and beside Daniel, he noticed that the arm that Daniel patted clearly wasn’t his “good arm”. Anyone could tell this because his arm had a white bandage wrapped around where the bullet became lodged in his arm. Virgil chuckled at the joke.
“Be careful next time,” Switch said as he rubbed his wounded arm. “It still hurts, man,”
“Switch, what’s your real name?” Virgil asked bluntly. In reality, Virgil did not know how to ask his questions as subtly as possible. “And why did you decide to join Terrence in whatever he does? Obviously you’re different than him,”
Switch stopped stroking his arm and reclined back in his bed. “I ain’t gotta tell you that,” He said in a low voice. He looked forward at the wall. “I ain’t gotta tell you nothing,”
“Why not?” Virgil asked. Daniel sat mute. He had nothing to say about what Virgil was asking.
“Because it’s my life,” Switch said. “I don’t have to reveal anything to you,” Turning his head to Virgil, he asked, “Why do you want to know anyway?”
“Because he does,” Daniel answered coldly. He looked at Switch. “What’s the problem with telling us a little about yourself?”
“Because you’re just like the others,” He said as he returned Daniel’s look but with more anger. “All they did was feel pity for me. I don’t need anymore pity than I have already,”
“What do you mean?” Virgil asked. He leaned forward in his chair, his elbows resting on his lap. “We’re not going to pity you, Switch. I just wanted to know why are you doing things that obviously don’t fit your nature,”
“My nature?” Switch repeated as his gaze turned to Virgil. “What do you mean?”
“Obviously you’re not like Daniel’s cousin,” Virgil said again. “You actually saved us from getting killed right on the spot,”
“Well I had to,” Switch said nonchalantly like his deed was an everyday thing. “I couldn’t let Terrence kill you over something stupid,”
Virgil sat upright in his chair. “True,” He said. “but you didn’t have to save us. That other guy beside Terrence didn’t care,”
Switch became silent. “Yeah, well that’s Andre. He doesn’t care much for life. He’s worse off than I am,” He sighed and looked over at Virgil. “It’s a shame to see people go downhill, y’know?” Virgil looked over at Daniel and sighed. He silently agreed that it was a pity to see your friends drastically change. He, like Switch, wanted to see everything as the way it was before the changes. He missed the old Daniel. The one he knew now was more interested in keeping his life together instead of wondering which cheerleader is the most attractive out of the whole squad. Daniel’s life was falling into a deep spiral and Virgil could only watch.
“Yeah,” Virgil said silently as he gazed at Daniel. His mind began to recall the words Daniel had said at the lobby desk. It began to stress him. “I’ve got to ask him later,” Thought Virgil. “before I die from wonder,”
“So are you going to tell us you’re name, Switch?” Daniel asked. “Or should I say Mr. Collins?” He smiled and Switch frowned. Turning off the television, Switch sat in silence for a second.
“My name’s Avery,” He started. “Avery Collins, ok?” He looked over to Daniel, who had reclined in the chair with his arms folded. “I joined your cousin, Terrence, because I was bored with life. It wasn’t much of a change, just a little more excitement, y’know? After a while, things became different. I was always having fun: hangin’ out with girls, going to clubs, meetin’ new people. It was the life,” He smiled at the memories. His eyes seemed to light up in spite of the dim room that surrounded them. “Until,” He added. Immediately he frowned. Virgil figured that a dark memory had surfaced. “Until Terrence joined a gang. He wasn’t the same any more. Me and Andre noticed his changes, too. He would get these weird calls on his phone and he would leave us while we’re out partyin’. Sometimes he’d come back, but not without blood on his face and a busted lip or a black eye,” Switch stroked his wounded arm as his listeners remained silent. Through a sigh, he finished by saying, “I guess I’m not like them. I chose not to join their gang,”
Feeling that they had been with Switch forever, Virgil quickly glanced up at the clock. “It’s already two o’clock?” Virgil thought. “We’d better get home then. It’s my turn to cook dinner. Not to mention have time to ask Daniel a question on the way home,”
“Avery,” Virgil said shyly. “It’s, um, time for me and Daniel to go,”
“Alright, guys,” Switch said. He seemed warmer now that somebody wanted to hear his story. Neither Virgil nor Daniel felt pity for him. They just wanted to know about him. He shook their hands and said “I’ll see you guys later when I get out. Hopefully before Christmas though,”
“Yeah,” Virgil said smiling. “I’ll invite you to our Christmas party,”
“I’d like that,” Switch said.
Closing the door, Virgil followed Daniel down the hall towards the elevators. Bypassing the busy doctors and the loitering nurses, the boys finally made it to the elevator. Upon arrival a crudely written “out of order” sign greeted them. Virgil let out a sigh and made his way to the door leading to the flight of stairs that would lead them to the hospital lobby. He twisted the knob and slowly opened the door. The stairwell was small and dimly lit by small wall lights on each wall. Like the elevators, it had a gray carpet and a dull whitewashed wall. As Virgil and Daniel made their way down the dim stairwell, the stairs creaked.
“Daniel,” Virgil said as he dodged a possibly creaky stair. “what did you mean when you said there are a lot of things that I’ve never asked about you,”
“What I said,” Daniel said from behind him. He sounded empathetic. “Like for example, I’m not totally in love with Maria, Virg,” As he said this Virgil noticed that Daniel’s voice became softer and quieter. It seemed odd to him.
Virgil turned around. “What do mean, Daniel? I thought you did,” Daniel averted his gaze from his friend. It was him this time that was put on the spot. He stared at the small wall light and played with the seashell-like cover for the light.
“I do, but,” He started to say as he ran his fingers over the bumps in the shell. His voice had trailed off and Virgil still wanted to know his answer. Standing in interest, Virgil decided to go up to the previous landing and talk ask Daniel face-to-face. The floors creaked as he moved as if warning him not to confront his friend. “I must,” He thought. “I have to if I want to put these feelings to rest,” Ignoring the warning of the stairs, Virgil finally came face to face with Daniel.
“But?” Virgil said as he leaned against the wall. As he leaned there, he noticed something different about Daniel’s facial expression. It was no longer serious or troubled. It seemed…happy.
“But sometimes,” He started again. The light above the two illuminated Daniel’s face, making Virgil see more in Daniel that he had ever seen. Daniel felt something that Virgil had been feeling all along. Daniel looked at Virgil. “I like you too, Virg,” Virgil’s heart stopped.
“What?” He said incredulously. “Are you serious?”
His friend gave him a small smile. “As serious as I’ve ever been, man,” He moved closer to Virgil. “I noticed you felt the same when you looked at me differently on Friday. You seemed to be fixed on every word I said. I told you that you seemed different,” Virgil’s emotions began to soar. He felt happy now that his feelings were now in the open, but he was also bothered that Daniel already knew. Was it that obvious?
“So what does this mean?” Virgil said looking past his friend at the dark corner behind Daniel. “I mean, should it mean anything?” He added sheepishly. Now he moved closer to Daniel.
“I don’t know,” Daniel said smiling. “If you want it to be,” Daniel leaned in towards Virgil. Inches from his face, Virgil leaned in also. He felt alive again. It was the same feeling that he felt when he had kissed Melissa. Except this one felt better. “Melissa,” Thought Virgil. He stepped back from their intimate contact.
“Wait, Daniel,” Virgil said looking past him again. “I…gotta tell you something,”
Daniel frowned as leaned against the wall. “Yeah?” He asked. Virgil could tell that Daniel wanted to continue what they were doing. Virgil felt the same way, too, but he couldn’t bear the secret.
“I…made out with Melissa,” He said nervously. “I didn’t want to say anything,”
Daniel looked at Virgil in amazement. He said nothing. His eyes merely looked through Virgil. “I can’t believe it, Virgil,” He said after a few seconds of awkward silence. “You…finally did it,” Daniel said as he continued to look at his betrayer. “You’ve finally betrayed me, man,”
Virgil felt hot. “No, man,” He said quickly. “It wasn’t like—“
“No, Virgil. I know what it was like,” Daniel said. His eyebrow lowered in frustration. “You did it in spite, didn’t you? Was it because I was dating Maria? Tell me, Virgil,” Daniel waited on the boy’s next words. Unfortunately for Virgil, they came slowly.
“Yeah, you’re right,” Virgil admitted. “I…I couldn’t help myself. It was too—“ Virgil stopped as he watched Daniel make his way down the flight of stairs without him. He sighed. He felt horrible now. It was the second time he had torn a rift between them that caused Daniel to leave him. This time he only felt worse because he almost gave a part of himself to his best friend.