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So much has happened this week. I probably should have made a journal before now.

Around Monday?:

Teams. Shelb's Varsity. Shauna's swinger, and I'm JV. I predicted as much, but it still stung. I need to work on my conditioning, decisiveness, and ankles. Damn you two ******** to hell.

Tuesday:

I just remember how high-and-mighty Shelby was acting. How she took up leading the goalies with a slightly snooty flair. Aaron, Mariah's dad and our past coach, was treating Shelby like royalty and treating ME like a leper. Which totally blew my mind. What'd I do?

So both practices I sucked because envy was eating me and then self-loathing was slapping the fight out of me. I kept thinking, What if I'm only imagining it? What if Shelby's still the same and I'm the one acting different?

Wednesday:

Game against...whoever. Richmond? They got a goal in on me on a rebound while I was on the ground, but I think I redeemed myself by saving that penalty kick. Damn, the freshmen need to learn how to push LEGALLY. Then Mallori got a bloody nose in the second half from a blow to the head, so I went in again. I think we won. Or tied. I dunno. But both JV and Varsity kind of sucked. At least Varsity got better at the end.

What sucked was that I gave my water bottle to Shelby for her game since she keeps forgetting hers. And so when I needed it, when I was playing in MY game, my water was nowhere to be found. I had to go looking for it. It was thrown on the ground, empty, while she was in the circle of Varsity players laughing. I know it sounds stupid, but that really just pissed me off. Like a ******** slap to the face.

Thursday:

Had to run sprints because the bus that I was silent on the whole time was too loud. Wonderful. But they weren't that bad. And then Lisa gave a speech about how everyones' negative attitudes are affecting their game and it's sickening to watch. That there are bigger things than soccer. And that's when my mind fog finally started to clear, with the idea that yeah, there are bigger things. So why am I getting so hung up over Shelby? That helped.

Friday:

Morning practice and then a game against the Windham Eagles. Randi sitting by herself on the bus, reading Death Note. mrgreen JV went first. Shauna and I both did well, and Jenny scored the only goal. Which was beautiful, by the way. Far corner near-post shot, beautiful. So she got to be a starter for the V game. Which was very very heated and pushy. So sad when we lost in over time.

The only good part was sitting next to Taylor, who was pretending that she was a singing blade of grass. rofl

The ride home with Randi on the bus was HILARIOUS. Walri, farting mouths, that sort of stuff.

I think Shelby got knocked down a few pegs ego-wise. Not sure if that's good or bad.

Back at the school, I had to wait ten minutes for Shelby's dad to show, only to realize that he was waiting in the front parking lot the whole time. burning_eyes

So then we headed to the Target Starbucks. Which I think I planned, if I'm not mistaken. How did THAT happen? Colby demanding that we make plans with her? But it was fun.

Went home and left a note on the tv and slept and slept and sleptttt.

Saturday:

YES. PRESEASON OVER. Finally got to sleep in. Drizzly outside. Sleepy all day. I think it takes your wet, dirt-caked cat to pass out on your bed for you to finally wind down and relaxxxxxxx.

So, good day.

I wonder what school is going to be like. Anyone else dreading and anticipating it?

Shite, gotta finish UnSpun first..