Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

This Christmas was so tiring.

Grandma's dead, so we slept over at Aunt Audrey's. Which wasn't bad, since her house and food is okay, she's just clingy. ANDDDD we all know how I view that.

Plus I got squandered at Nana's and Papa's. Took a walk with P and Jenny for two miles on a barren Centerville road in the dead winter with a hoodie and gloves on. Am I a Mainer or what?

People were just...annoying me. It's like they want to cure me of my misanthropic antisocial personality by bombarding me with smothering emotions. I never really realize how that gets until I rip myself away from my books and writing and talk to family and find just how annoying they get. Dad didn't stop talking about his family problems and my uncle with his 70 year old girlfriend who makes him put all his calls on speakerphone. Like, he's telling Nana and Papa all that. Why do they want to know that? You need to know your audience. Then he'd talk about all serious stuff, politics, the war/s with Papa even though they never agree on anything. And he ended every single thing he said with a chuckle. 98% of which wasn't even close to funny. He kept teasing me, but it just pisses me off because he never stops nitpicking everything I do. I make a comment about how I'm going to bring the dvds I got for Christmas today to college with me, and he says I shouldn't bother because I won't have time and he's not going to pay for more than four years. And when I went to the gym, when I came home he nagged me because I couldn't even bother to charge my dead cellphone for two minutes, could I?

He tries hard, and I respect that in most people. Just not him. He's like Jenny in that he doesn't understand other people at all. If he keeps plowing through peoples' feelings (aka MINE) like he always has, and continues to ignore my strategically placed warnings, he's going to step over a line that he can't retreat back from.

Thinking of him makes me so tired..I'm trying so hard and when I say so, I either get ignored or told that I'm whining too much and that I don't even know what "tired" means yet. Getting constantly undermined is what I hate the most. The lack of respect is wearing thin.

So..

There was minimal fighting but it still didn't feel like Christmas. This year, the parentals went and got a tree without saying so, put it up without saying so. Mum took a half day one day and put on all the ornaments. And we actually got home on Christmas day, since Grandma's dead. Again, Jenny didn't get mum or dad a present. She only got me one ($20 for Borders) because she borrowed it all from dad. She spent her whole Christmas allowance on a blue fur hat for herself.

So, presents (the ones I remember):
• Box of books (from the sale I went with mum to)
• A nice sweater + half sweater thing that's weird but cool
• HAROLD AND MAUDE!
• FIGHT CLUB!
• Adams Family Values
• HP 6 on dvd
• Assorted shirts (Rocky Horror and one with an "Om" on it)
• A thingy that lets me hook up my iPod to the car stereo
• Borders cards, movies
• Lots of earrings (to be expected, since I have six piercings. These glass drop ones are awesome.)
• A charm bracelet from my aunt with all the charms from the places she went to in Alaska. Great, I really wanted a memento of all YOUR memories..
• Color changing nail polish (which, if it works, will make up for the charm bracelet)
• Lots of gold old lady jewelry (all given by relatives)
• Notebook cover from Gram and $50. She stitched it up with Aunt Audrey before she died. It's black and white. Cool..

That's all I remember. A good haul, even though I picked out more than half of them myself. I didn't make a list this year (didn't know what I wanted) so mum just decided to run everything by me before buying.

I really like the Bruce shirt I got her. It's got "TRAMPS LIKE US / BABY WE WERE / BORN TO RUN" on the front. I would have gotten it for myself if she didn't want it, but oh well.

Yay, holidays. I'll admit that this one had less conflict. But do I prefer the kind of dead holiday in its stead? I'm bothered either way. I just want this wonderful season to be over as soon as possible so I can stop feeling inferior to the holiday cheer.

The only good part was going to the gym on Christmas at seven PM, and the whole Fair Mall is completely deserted. McDonalds was closed. When has McDonalds ever been closed? It was eery and interesting -- at least to me. I turned half the lights on in the gym and cranked the top 40 hits to max volume and had fun. It was weird, because as soon as I locked up again a car pulled in and an old guy came to work out. Talk about timing, huh?