Lolz I found these when hunting through the forums these are my all time favorites.
Btw this is from omegle.com.xD
Alright so wtf to this guy >=o
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Where are you from
You: That fast? You must be the 7 minute man =o
You: and Canada
You: you?
Stranger: I'm froma place where seven is eight, eight is nine, and ten has endless possibilities, but is also 2 in binary
Stranger: Massachusetts
You: ;D Well you may as well divide by zero in that case.
Stranger: youre also the first north american person I've come across today
Stranger: oh we do
Stranger: like I said
Stranger: ten has endless possibilities
Stranger: it even cooks us breakfast in bed sometimes.
You: =o that kinda sucks.. I emt someone from Turkey and the others didn't last long enough because I insulted them for being pre-pubescent boys. Does it do it by 10 though? or is it a little late?
Stranger: but many of these things are only possibilities, not actualities
You: What I mean is, is it a woman, or a man this number 10?
You: Of course of course.
Stranger: its the number ten
Stranger: it's more of a concept
You: ohh so it's like the machine off of honey I shrunk the kids then?
Stranger: I hate that spot in the morning where it goes from nocturnal north americans to some sort of asians.
Stranger: who barely speak english
You: well have no fear, I nevar go to bed.. Until like 45 minutes from now. honestly first time i've ever used the site was today
Stranger: I mean, they have every technology ever over there, but they don't have an omegle in their native ;anguage?
Stranger: oh I See
Stranger: what you're STILL up? s**t you're worse than me. last night I woke at 7 PM, fell alseep at like 11 AM
Stranger: I took something to fix my sleep schedule tho, so I woke again at like 3 AM
Stranger: buried my cat in the early morn, ******** my whole schedule up
Stranger: So wahts your story
You: xD well this si the "universal" language. we're cocky ******** dontcha know. well I woke up like.. 19 hours ago. no biggy. wha happund?!
Stranger: he was 17.
You: and Insomnia leading to ******** schedule and so on.
You: oh christ. almost as old as I am >.<
Stranger: bladder filled, backed up into his organs
Stranger: would have been costly to get him surgery and chance of survival was low
Stranger: yeah I usually rock insomnia based ******** schedule, but that was a 330-422 AM adrenaline of a dig. so I was up til like 8 AM
You: This conversation is getting mundane. I feel empathy for you lost cat, I truly regret it. I hope.. you never forget them, and they don't come back from pet semetary.
Stranger: are you in high school, college, somewhere in between, or none of the above
You: erm should be done high school
Stranger: should be, what are you a derp?
You: dropped out in grade 10. and 10 times since then.. in 4 years..
Stranger: you dont seem like a derp
Stranger: ohhh ok
Stranger: why?
You: s**t sucks bro.
Stranger: well obv
Stranger: but do you just hate books
You: Mostly they're all alme wads and ********.
Stranger: or do you hate your town
You: Just the people of my town
Stranger: yeah
You: being all stupid and whorey and s**t.
Stranger: you should get a slice of that whoredom, sex is good, and that fountain of youthful sex doesn't last forever
Stranger: and the drama does end, and the orgasms are worth it
Stranger: just be safe.
Stranger: I'm 24 and it's already harder to get laid
Stranger: and believe me, I've never had any problem
Stranger: still don't, but its still harder
You: man. im 18 and I havent been laid in almost a year D=
You: srsly. almost all the girls have the clap here.
Stranger: ok, I feel you
Stranger: thats ******** disgusting
Stranger: move, *****
Stranger: just move
Stranger: get your canadian GED, come to america, go to high school, then move on to college
Stranger: theres plenty of p***y on that path
Stranger: btw, I was implying canadian schools are an entire 4 years behind the american equivalent
Stranger: we aren't huge on denim suits, but flannel is making a comeback in the indie community.
You: I'm going to but. apparently education is relevant to all things necessary to change my life >.< blah. college. I'm going for university. once they see my track record they'll cream fluffer nutter sandwiches. and yeah I realise. from are you smarter than a fifth grader.
Stranger: lol
You: yeah ******** indie. they're trying to steal the nineties back man.
Stranger: ya but the chicks are smoldering
You: and not to worry I own absolutely no denim. and yes they are. and they dig guys who play guitar. or well any instrument
Stranger: yeah, not so much
Stranger: they dont dig brass, saxophone, or the ukulele
You: Well FUUUUUU. I play trombone.. and guit.. but mostly trombone D= they don't dig Tiny Tim?! Who couldn't dig Tiny Tim?
Stranger: oh s**t, is your name david, by any chance
You: =o how'd you guess?!
You: my middle name.
Stranger: ebaums?
You: naww dog. xD I go there for laughs but.. no I'm Calum.
Stranger: newfag.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(My input:Wtf dude...wtf...?(O..O)? )
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hii
Stranger: Asl
You: Ohayo
You: Female-British-16
You: XD
Stranger: Male 16 uk so good match wink
You: *fires-layzors*
You: DENIED
You: >:O===============
Stranger: Er yerr...
You: D;
Stranger: So you horny?
You: -__-"
Your conversational partner has disconnected
(My input:OOOOooo DENIED! ;3 )
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hey there ;D
Stranger: how are u?
You: I'm old. how about yourself?
You: wait. Can I ask you something?
Stranger: okay
You: Are you the grim reaper? Come to take my soul and put in your heart shaped box? Like the tooth fairy shoves all the old teeth up her rectum?
You: Please tell me you are
You: I hurt so badly.
You: I'm 187
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
Stranger: asl?
You: Hai there
You: 19/f/soon to be your pants
Stranger: 16
Stranger: finland
Stranger: male
Stranger: sounds young;>
You: who me? If you'd like a pic, I'll send one?
Stranger: no im young!
Stranger: biggrin
Stranger: meant
You: Ohh well that's no problem, what's the age of consent in Finland?
Stranger: of what
You: of sex you silly goose!
You: Naughty Naughty. Bend over and let Mother Theresa spank you for your sins. Then Jesus shall join in. then the fun really begins =)
Stranger: i dont know...
Stranger: havent like that
Stranger: biggrin
Stranger: every one can sex
Stranger: lol
Stranger: biggrin
Stranger: Its not Crime
You: =o sounds exciting. sountry wide orgy? that sounds good.
You: country*
You: but you don't like sex? =o
Stranger: i like!
Stranger: im fuking 10 women
Stranger: on this week
Stranger: biggrin
Stranger: do you?
You: ohh well chalk me up cowboy ;D ridin them horses allll night long are ya?
You: Ohh I love it more than heroin.
Stranger: yee
Stranger: biggrin
You: You ever try heroin. it's the bees knees little boy. And I think I'm going to inject into some candy and feed it to you ;D then you'll wake up in my pink sheet'd bed and you'll be begging for more. But you won't know what you want more. me or the heroin
You have disconnected.
(My input:Why the hell does the kid keep smiling? .(._.). )
Stranger: 141
You: idgi
Stranger: Dammit RAMIREZ, read a book for once
You: shut up b***h
Stranger: IT'S A ******
Stranger: OPEN FIRE
You: HO s**t
You: AHHHHHHHH
Stranger: RAMIREZ, MAN THAT HARPOON
Stranger: RAMIREZ, MELEE THAT CHOPPA
Stranger: RAMIREZ, FIRE THAT GRENADE
You: RAMIREZ AIN'T DOIN s**t
Stranger: RAMIREZ, TAKE THAT BUILDING
Stranger: RAMIREZ, TOSS THAT GRENADE
You: b***h
You: I LOVE YOU
Stranger: OH s**t, ITS A GAY
You: YES
Stranger: MAN THE HARPOONS
You: YOU KNOW YOU WANT MEEEEE
You: GET ON YOUR KNEES
Stranger: RAMIREZ, MAN THE LAZERS
You: THEY DIED
You: YOUR PRECIOUS RAMIREZ IS A FILTHY MEXICAN
Stranger: RAMIREZ, RADIO FOR EVAC
You: NOOOOOOOO
Stranger: DAMMIT CHOPPA'S TAKING FIRE
Stranger: RAMIREZ, MAN THE AA GUN
Stranger: RAMIREZ, TAKE THAT RPG AND TAKE OUT THAT JET
You: I'M A HIPPIE AND WHAT IS THIS s**t?!
Stranger: s**t, CAPTAIN PRICE WE HAVE A SITUATION
You: SIR?
Stranger: WHO ARE YOU SOLDIER?
You: JESUS
You: RESPAWNED
Stranger: s**t IT'S A JEW
You: ONLY ON THURSDAY
Stranger: RAMIREZ, GET THAT CHOPPA ON THE GROUND
Stranger: STAY FROSTY MEN
You: IS THAT AN INVITATION?
Stranger: GET TO THE CHOPPA!!!
You: CAN I GET FROSTY WITH YOU?
Stranger: SQUADS OUT
Stranger: WE ARE OSCAR MIKE
You: LET'S GET FROSTY
Stranger: .../b/rother O_O
You: I DON'
You: T CARE
You: NOW SAY YOU LOVE ME
Stranger: I'M 12 AND WHAT IS THIS?
You: ITS SHOTACON
Stranger: just gtfo
You: NO
You: YOU LEAVE
Stranger: I ALREADY GOT OUT IN THE CHOPPA b***h
You: LIES
Stranger: TRUTHZZZ
You: REFUSSSEEEEE
Stranger: DEEERRRRPPPPPP
You: I DON'T SPEAK SWAHILI
You: SORRY
Stranger: IT'S TIME TO BECOME AN HERO
You: I'LL BE YOUR ROBIN IF YOU'LL BE MY BATMAN
You: ;d
Stranger: OH LAWD
Stranger: IS I IN HEAVEN?
You: OH YESSSS
Stranger: WHERE MY ******** KFC?
You: SHUT UP NIG
Stranger: NAW *****, JUST WANT FRYIINN CHIKEENZZ
You: LAWLS WERE ARE YOU FROM?
Stranger: TEXAS
Stranger: LAWL
Stranger: OH THE IRONY
You: ONLY STEERS AND QUEERS COME FROM TEXAS AND I DON'T SEE ANY HORNS ON YA
Stranger: YOUR DOIN IT WRONG
You: NUUUUU
Stranger: RAMIREZ, GET OFF THE DAMN ROOF AND HELP ME WITH THIS GUY
You: AHHH ********
You: YOU SUCK a**
You: ******** YOU
You: I JUST SHOT RAMIREZ
You: IN THE d**k
Stranger: RAMIREZ, IM NOT PAYING YOU TO LOSE YOUR GENETALIA, SHOOT THE DAMN JEW
You: BUT IMMA LADY!
Stranger: A JEW LADY!!!
Stranger: s**t
Stranger: CALL IN THE AIR SUPPORT
You: ANNE FRANK FIRE ARTILLARY
Stranger: RAMIREZ, PUT A FLARE OUT
Stranger: RAMIREZ, GO STAND OVER THERE
You: JEW MUSIC
You: JEWS
You: JEWS
You: JEWS
Stranger: ******
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
I don't even know...
(My input:LOLZ...wtf?)
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: I'm 14 and male,, what are you??
You: 14 female
You: O-O
You: one question.
Stranger: ooohhhh
Stranger: finally
You: what the heck are you going on about ehre?
Stranger: someone my own age
You: here*~.
You: tryna get some n***s?
You: like 90% of people on here.?
Stranger: nooooo
You: Lol@bs.
Stranger: wbu??
You: Ehhm,
You: i'm actually messing around.
You: Posting all my conversations in a forum.
Stranger: fair anough
You: you'll be in it.
You: biggrin
Stranger: cool
You: What's your name?
You: say hi.
Stranger: be sure to send me the link
Stranger: secret
Stranger: wbu??
You: ohai.
You: i'm jen.
Stranger: oh ok
You: biggrin
Stranger: lets start the convo
Stranger: lets make it funny
Stranger: include some sexy stuff
You: you know they're gonna read this part too.
Stranger: hi
Stranger: lmfao
You: Unless you want me to cut it off?
Stranger: well where the fun in that??
Stranger: i aint bothred
You: lolk.
You: Ohithere.
You: you smell like fish.
You: ever heard of a shower?
Stranger: no i actually am a fish
You: bleh.
You: Ohreally?
Stranger: we live in water
You: i think i knew that.
Stranger: no need for showers in here
You: water overdose?
Stranger: but for gods sake close your legs
You: you stink cause you're so wrinkly.
Stranger: smells nasty
You: Lolwut.
You: i'm all clean.
You: D;
Stranger: i cba lmao
Stranger: bye x
You: that's your fishy
You: smell
You: comming from above.
You: D:
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(My input:Tom says fish swim in water.lolz.xD)
You: YO
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(My input:Tom says that's just racist man...racist...)
Stranger: hello strangeeerr
You: BILLY MAYS HERE
Stranger: OH JOY
You: TO SELL YOU OXICLEAMSHAMWOW
Stranger: WTF IS THAT DUDE? D:
You: AFTER MARRYING VICE WE PRODUCED THIS HYBRID
Stranger: oh lol
You: IT'LL SLAP YOUR TROUBLES AWAY AND ABSORB YOUR ******** DOG
Stranger: CHUCK NORRIS IS HERE TO SELL YOU DOUBLE GLAZING
You: ********
You: IT HAS MOAR SUCKAGE THEN A HOOKER USING A VACCUM
Stranger: BUY HIS ******** DOUBLE GLAZING b***h.
Stranger:
You: ******** YOU I;M BILLY MAYS
Stranger: ******** YOU, IM CHUCK NORRIS.
You: I CAN KILL YOUR CHILDREN WITH OXICLEAN
You: OLD MAN YOU BE CHALLENGING ME?
Stranger: ******** YOU, CHUCK HAD A SEX CHANGE AND IS NOW A WOMAN
Stranger: HE/SHE WILL BERE YOUR CHILDREN
You: BACK THE ******** UP
You: CHUCK IS NOW A WEEMINZ
Stranger: NEEEEVER
You: GB2 THE KITCHEN
You: AND TRY MY NEW PRODUCT
Stranger: YES HE I MENT SHE IS WEEMINZ
You: THIS s**t IS SO EXTREME
You: I HAVE TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS
Stranger: CHUCK NORRIS HAS MAN SLAVES TO DO HER COOKING FOR HER
Stranger: CAPS ARE IMMENCE MAN
You: IMMENCE YOU SAY?
Stranger: INDEED
You: I AM SO MANLY I DRINK OXICLEAN WITH GUNS
You: GUNS MAN
You: GUNS
Stranger: CHUCK IS MANLIER THAN THOU.
Stranger: HE PISSES PURE OXILEAN
You: I'M SO GODDAMN MANLY I s**t BULLETS AND RAEP OTHER MEN
Stranger: I MEAN SHE
You: BUSTED
You: D:
Stranger: WHEN SINCE WAS ******** OTHER MEN MANLY? FAAAAGGOOOOTTT
Stranger: OH NOES D:
You: IT IS SO GODDAMN MANLY
You: BECAUSE IT'S RAEP
Stranger: MMM YES
You: UNF UNF UNF
Stranger: RAEP IS MANLY
You: MY TEARS CURE CANCER
You: FROM MY PEN0R
Stranger: p***s TEARS?
Stranger: GOD THATS ******** MANLY
You: I CREATED OPTIMUS PRIME WITH THEM
Stranger: YOU GAVE BIRTH WITH p***s TEARS?
Stranger: WIN, I SAY.
You: THANK YOU GOOD SIR
You: BUT I MUST BE ON MY WAY
Stranger: IT'S MADAM ACTUALLY.
You: TO DO MANYLY THINGS
You: LIKE DRINK GUNS
Stranger: OH SO MANLY
Stranger: MM
You: I BID YOU ADIEU
You have disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: biggrin
Stranger: male or female
You: GUESS WHAT I LIKE TO DO!
Stranger: wat >_>
You: I LIKE TO COLOR!
Stranger: good for u how old r u
You: I AM 16 YEARS OF OLD
Stranger: male or female!
You: FEMALE
Stranger: !!!!!!!
Stranger: really
You: ARE YOU A MALE?!
You: AND YES REALLY! DER DER DER
Stranger: uh um yes
You: EWWW! BOYS HAVE COOTIES!
You have disconnected.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: looking for a girl to cyber
You: let's do this baby
Stranger: ok u start
You: I'm a little shy....
Stranger: describe yourself
You: um, brunnete(sp?)
Stranger: what are you wearing
You: 5 foot 3 inches
You: a pink t shirt
You: and pantys to match wink
You: you?
Stranger: jeans, a nice t shirt and nice boxers
You: hurry up dude I need to get off so bad
You: let's just cut the small talk OK baby?
Stranger: all right lets run a small scenario
Stranger: your sanding in the door way wearing just what you have on
Stranger: im seated on a chair
Stranger: what are you dooing?
You: I start walking towards you
You: but slowly, because I'm shy remember
You: I get closer to you, and I start breathing harder as I get closer
Stranger: slowly i take off my shirt
Stranger: then you cautiosly take off your shirt
Stranger: showing your perkky tits
You: wow wow wow
You: I actually don't have perky tits
You: I have nice round C cups smile
Stranger: works for me wink
You: OK
You: I then get on my knees, almost trembling I reach for your zipper
Stranger: go on...
You: I slowly start pulling it down, stopping before I get it all the way down
You: I think about what I'm doing, but then realize the moment is right.
You: I then reach for my v****a and pull out a rusty razor blade and cut off your d**k.
I had to stop because I was lmfao too much.
(My input:btw the you was a guy lolz.xD)
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: sex?
You: HURGH
You: me?
You: why
You: I love sex
You: sex is awesome
Stranger: really?
You: which reminds me
Stranger: i never done it
You: Honestly why haven't we had sex yet?
Stranger: jesus told me to wait til i was married
You: well he never had sex
Stranger: neither did his mom
You: so who is he to tell you when you should have sex
You: and look what happened
You: she got preggers
Stranger: her son died
You: which goes to show you
You: dude
You: god just stuck the tip in
You: and BAM
You: blew is load on the spot
You: then jesus came about
You: bein chill
You: then the jews where liek
Stranger: yea ******** those guys
You: D00D STOP BEIN KEWL IN OUR HOMEZ DAWG
You: and jesus wus like
You: SHUT UP NIUGGAS I ROLL WHERE I WANNA ROLL
Stranger: werd
You: and then jesus was a permanent Y for people to finish with M C A
Stranger: damn ur mad smart
You: I know
Stranger: i think im gonna go out and stick it in random a** ppl now
You: dude
You: happens all the time
You: 4 srs
You: hell
You: 5srs
You: but not 6 srs
You: that's just silly
Stranger: WROD!!!
Stranger: gotta go stick in the dog!!
Stranger: catch you later
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
(My input:.....Werd...)
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