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Today I came home and for whatever reason my mother was really angry. I was going to do cram as soon as I got home but she decided to beat me with a potspoon again for no reason. As usual I took it all an layed on the ground for an hour and cried. I tried to take my own life again but then I didn't.... Because I can remember the good times I've had with my friends and I can remember smiling from all your comments... Naturally even though my mom screams and beats me I can't help but feel I deserve it... Sometime... Somewhere I know I've done something....
I Really can't order my sentances right now.... Kind of... Still in shock after that. Anyways even though my mom hits me and screams at me I still feel like I owe her... Because I do. I would really like for her to hit me no longer, but, it won't happen....
Looking myself in the mirror and saying....
"where's that beautiful smile honey... "
In real I haven't ever dated anyone, because no one is my type. I never had a dad that was like I wanted... so I play all the members of my family... I know your probally thinking psycho.... But no one really seems to care about me in real so I act like my own family for myself. I think my mom cares about me though... I D K.